Amor Manet
by Roadrunnerz
Summary: Time flees, love remains. Or does it? Amor Manet takes place two years after Strangers ended and follows the lives of the same characters. Some try to escape their past and others realize that they can't. David/Anna, Alex/Dimitri, Robin, Robert.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1 **

_Pine Valley, PA_

* * *

Leah Hayward sat at the piano when Robin entered the mountain cabin. What she was doing wasn't exactly playing but sometimes Robin thought she heard her sister string a couple of notes together. Maybe she was going to take after her Dad, after all.

Leah jumped from the piano seat when she her sister come into the room and ran into her arms.

Robin Scorpio scooped her up and held tight. Or at least as tightly as Leah let her.

In turn Leah planted a wet kiss on her cheeks.

"I am going to miss you _so_ much," she whispered into the little girl's ear.

She didn't see her mother sneak up behind her and plant a kiss on the top of her head too. "We'll miss you a little too," she said with a smile.

"Stay Robin," Leah told her. Her black hair was past her shoulders now and its ends curled up. Robin loved to play with them, on the rare occasions when Leah sat still long enough to give her the chance.

Her mother scooped Leah up from her arms. "Good luck with that," she whispered to her youngest daughter. "Your Dad and I tried for two months. We even resorted to blackmail and bribing and it didn't get us anywhere."

Robin raised her brows. "I thought tonight we were going out to celebrate?"

Anna raised her hands in defence. "Sorry...I couldn't resist a last ditch effort."

"Nice try." Robin smiled and gave her mother a kiss too. "You look great, Mom. Judging from what you're wearing and the fact that you managed to get Leah into a dress, it's going to be a fancy restaurant."

"Nothing but the best tonight. It's not every day my daughter goes off to save the world."

"I'm going to be back before you know it. I wouldn't miss your summer wedding for the world."

Anna cringed. "Ah...David's wedding."

Robin laughed. "Last time I checked you were going to be in it too."

"Don't get me wrong...nothing will stop me from being next to him when we walk down that aisle. But the idea of a big wedding is about as appealing to me as spending an afternoon cooking."

"I think the idea of a big wedding is a whole lot _more_ appealing than you cooking."

"Funny."

Robin was still wearing the jeans and sweater she'd worn on her drive down from Chicago, but she had enough clothes at the cabin that she could change into something more suitable. Looking at her mother holding Leah made her realize she'd miss them too. More than she'd admit, at least to her mother.

"Is David here?"

Her mother nodded, "He's getting ready upstairs. If you think I look fancy you should check out his suit."

"Do you mind if I go see him alone for a sec?"

"No...of course not. Go ahead."

Robin caught her mother eyeing her with curious eyes, instantly wondering what she had in mind. Robin bit her lip and avoided her gaze. If anyone could read her like an open book, it was her mother. She was the one person in the world that Robin couldn't keep anything from and knowing that, it had been a long time since she'd even bothered to try.

Suddenly the weight of the backpack she carried seemed unbearably heavy, making Robin doubt herself all over again.

Anna was still holding Leah in her arms and Robin took another look at her. It hadn't been flattery when she said her mother looked good tonight. It was fair to say she looked stunning; wearing a black evening dress that left one shoulder-bare and the other one draped in a shawl-like sleeve with a tiny row of crystal sequins that ran from her shoulder blade to her wrist. A diamond engagement ring, her silver Swiss watch and diamond stud earrings were the only jewellery she wore.

It was elegant and stylish to a fault, but what made Robin take notice more than anything else was that for the first time in a long time, her mother looked happy. Healthy. She finally gained some much needed weight and because she hadn't worked in the last six months and spent much of that time outside with Leah, her skin was tanned and glowing. She even sported a few freckles.

It was a stark contrast to the image she had of her mother just over year ago when all their lives had been vastly different.

Robin had been in Paris then, still studying at the Sorbonne.

Anna, David and Leah had gone back to the US. David had initially wanted to return to Pine Valley but Anna had protested, saying it no longer felt like home.

Robin thought they'd made a reasonable compromise when Anna suggested Chicago instead. They rented a Victorian town home there, while David kept both his job and mountain cabin home in Pine Valley, commuting to and from the two cities on a weekly basis.

Robin knew that in order to open to open her private investigation agency, she needed to be in a large, urban centre. Robin also knew that the job would give her the time and resources to work on finding Alex and that on occasion Sean Donley would help her with the task.

All of it made sense and Robin didn't think to question it.

But because she was an ocean away and consumed with her studies, Robin had no idea of the full extent of their fixation. She didn't realize that finding Alex Marick and Cesar Faison was a mutual guilt-fuelled obsession for both Sean and her mother. One that took up nearly every waking moment of their lives and that in turn, both their personal lives were coming apart at the seams.

It wasn't until long afterwards that Robin found out that Tiffany had threatened to leave Sean if he didn't stop.

And that David had contemplated suing for full custody of Leah only days before he made that phone call to her in Paris, in the middle of the night.

It still gave Robin chills when her mind drifted back to that phone call.

* * *

_One year earlier_

_Paris, France _

_"David? Is that you? It's three in the morn..." _

_"Robin, it's your Mom. There's been an accident." _

The words had cut to the bone and shaken every last bit of sleepiness from her.

_"An accident...what do you mean?" _

_"She was crossing a street in Toronto, when a car hit her." _

_"A car hit her? In... Toronto, as in Canada?"_

None of what he was saying made sense then.

_"She went up there to follow some sort of lead on Alex."_

_"Is she...?" _

_"I don't know, Robin. But I need you to come here." _

_"To... Toronto?" _

_"No, Chicago. Anna left Leah with Sean and Tiff thinking she'd be back tonight. I'd feel better knowing you were there with her...Robin, I need you to take care of your sister for me."_

_"But David...I can't just....why don't you go to Chicago, you're so much closer? And what about Mom?"_

_"That's why I need you here, Robin. Because I need to do something I should've done a long time ago...I need take care of your mother." _

_"David, is something else wrong?"_

She remembered asking more questions. Wondering why he was so insistent. He'd never before sounded as angry and determined as he did that night.

That night, for the very first time, David reminded Robin of her father.

_"Please, Robin, can you do this for us? For all three of us? I know it's asking a lot, but I wouldn't ask if I didn't think it was really important." _

Robin knew what her answer would be before he finished asking. Of course she wouldn't say no. She could make up a class, or an exam, but with the exception of her uncle; her mother, Leah and David were the only family she had left. They meant the world to her. She had already lost one family once. She wouldn't risk losing this one too.

_"Okay, okay...I'll go to the airport right away. I'll take the first flight to Chicago..." _

_"I'll reimburse your fare, sweetheart. Whatever you need to pay, just take the first flight, alright?" _

_"Will you call me as soon as you know more about mom?" _

_"Of course. I'll be in Toronto before you're in Chicago. I'll call you as soon as I get there." _

Robin remembered trying to swallow because suddenly her mouth felt completely dry.

_"Please make sure she's okay." _

_"You bet. And Robin..." _

_"What?" _

_"I love you." _

She didn't remember much of what happened until she arrived in Chicago. There was a mad dash to pack something. Anything. Bundles of clothing were tossed into a dusty suitcase. A hurried taxi ride to Charles de Gaulle. Desperate, irritated pleading with an unhelpful ticket agent to find her seat. Any damn seat that would bring her as close to Chicago as soon as possible.

What happened afterwards _was_ still clear in her mind though.

She remembered her shock at seeing Sean Donely, who came to pick her up at O'Hare, and barely recognizing him. He'd been happy to see her, but he looked nothing like the man she knew so well. He'd lost weight and sported a week-old beard and the suit jacket he wore was rumpled. On the ride back into the city, the tension between him and Tiffany was so thick, Robin could have sworn she could cut it with a knife.

It was a feeling so foreign to her that she didn't know what to make of it. Didn't know what to say or how to react. For the first time she was at a loss of words with two people who'd always been as close to her as if they were her flesh and blood family.

Leah, on the other hand was blissfully oblivious to it all. She'd greeted Robin with a beaming smile and ran into her arms the moment she arrived, leaving them only with considerable protest when Sean insisted on putting her into the car seat. She babbled all the way home, managing to do something she didn't think was possible. She made Robin laugh with the smattering of new words she'd mastered and now used in completely random sentences, every other one of which seemed to end in a question.

_"Since when have you been such a chatterbox?" _

_"What's a chatterbox?" _

Robin laughed and Leah pulled at Robin's hand, declaring that she loved her big sister, words that made Robin wonder how she'd managed to stay away from Leah for many months.

True to his word, David called shortly after she landed, while they were still on the highway, and Robin gave Tiffany a grateful look when she saw her making an effort to entertain Leah while she was on the phone.

_"I'm with Leah..."_ Robin started.

David didn't make small talk_. "Your Mom's okay. Some bruised ribs and a twisted ankle but thankfully nothing more serious. I took her back to the hotel and we're flying back to Pine Valley tomorrow." _

_"Can I talk to her?" _

_"She's sleeping now." _

_"Do you want me to stay in Chicago, or come to Pine Valley?"_

_"Can you come to Pine Valley with Leah? I think it would be good for your mother to have her whole family around for a while. To make her realize what she's been missing..."_

The things he didn't say made Robin worry more than those he did.

_"David...is everything okay?" _

His pause was long enough that he didn't need to answer.

_"No, Robin. They haven't been for a while. But I'll be damned if I'm not going to try one last time to make things right."_

Robin remembered doing as he asked, in spite of Sean and Tiffany's protests, who tried to convince her to stay in Chicago. At least for a few days.

She remembered packing Leah's essentials the next day and hitting the road in her mother's Mustang just as the sun rose, with her sleepy sister in the car seat behind her.

It would be a long drive to Pine Valley and the jet lag was just starting to hit her, but Robin didn't care. She turned up the radio, bought a large cup of coffee at the first drive-through she saw and realized it had been a long time since she felt quite as at home as she did that morning, driving down an American highway with her little sister.

It was the calm before the storm.

She arrived at the cabin with Leah before David and her mother did and she wasn't sure anymore how she'd gotten both of them to bed, but she did remember ordering a pizza and that it was cold and she was fast asleep, when she was woken by the sound of David and her mother stumbling into the cabin.

Robin grabbed a robe and silently made her way down the stairs. There hadn't always been an 'upstairs' to the cabin. That is, until David decided that she and Leah both needed their own rooms here. He'd told Robin that he her to think of the cabin as her home, just as much as Leah and Anna did.

A trench coat was draped over her mother's shoulders and David had an arm around her as she entered the cabin.

"Mom..." Robin turned on the light and rushed towards her mother, wanting to hug her, but David held out a protective hand.

"Maybe wait until the ribs..."

"Oh, I'm sorry...I wasn't thinking, " she squeezed her mother's hand, getting a look at her for the first time, shocked at what she saw. "I'm so... glad you're okay."

To say her mother looked terrible would've been an understatement. She'd lost weight since Robin had last seen her, and at first glance she looked not only hurt, but completely spent and exhausted.

Anna's eyes widened, in equal shock. "Robin? _What are you doing here?"_

Robin turned to David, "Didn't you tell...?" He didn't quite meet her eyes and it was all the answer she needed. She sighed. "I'm guessing you didn't."

Her mother turned to David in silence, her look making it obvious that she didn't appreciate being left in the dark.

"I thought you could use your entire family around you for a change," David mumbled.

"You could have let me know."

"Mom..." Robin suddenly felt like an intruder.

Anna touched her shoulder and gave her a lopsided smile. "It's good to see you, sweetheart. I'm just...surprised." She managed a genuine smile. "In a good way."

Robin wasn't convinced. "I brought Leah here. She's asleep upstairs."

"Leah's here?" Anna was even more surprised now. "I thought she was in Chicago with Sean and Tiff? Robin, what made you decide to bring her here..."

David didn't give Robin a chance to answer. "I asked her to."

Robin cringed, sensing what her mother's reaction would be.

Anna turned to David, fuming. "You feel like deciding anything else for me? Like what I should wear tomorrow?"

David didn't look even mildly apologetic. "Pyjamas." He shot back without missing a beat. "Since you're going to stay in bed tomorrow."

"Don't bet on it..."

"Oh, I will. Bet on it."

Robin was beginning to feel like an unwanted fly on the wall and it was making her angry. As if the jet lag and the lukewarm welcome weren't bad enough, she now had to play peacemaker. "Mom...why don't you get some rest and finish this argument tomorrow?"

Her mother's lips tightened. "Thanks. I needed one more person telling me what to do."

Robin's cheeks flushed. "It's just a suggestion. And while I'm..._suggesting_, maybe have a look in the mirror, Mom. You look like you could use more than a day's rest."

David flashed Anna a triumphant smirk. "_That _is exactly why I needed her here."

* * *

_Next day_

Robin was already sitting in the kitchen cradling her second cup of coffee when she saw David make his way in, still in his sleep wear, looking like he hadn't slept much longer than she did.

He gave her a grin nonetheless. "Still on Paris time?"

Robin nodded. "Probably will be for another couple of days."

He poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down at the table next to her, yawning.

Robin loved this room. It was bright, spacious and had a giant window with a view of the forest that surrounded the cabin. A birdfeeder hung outside and Robin had been watching at least a dozen birds of just as many colours make use of it this past hour.

"Since it's just you and me, you want to tell me what's going on with you and Mom?" she asked, cupping her ceramic mug with both hands.

David swallowed. "No small talk about the weather with you, huh?"

"I didn't fly across the ocean for that."

"No, I suppose you didn't."

"Well? On the phone you told me that things haven't been okay for a while. What did you mean by that?"

David stared into his own coffee mug and his eyes didn't meet her gaze. His silence seemed to last forever, until he finally raised his head to look at her. "I'm not sure I have a right to discuss my marital problems with you. I said some things in the heat of the moment yesterday..."

"I'd have to be blind not to notice that things aren't good with you and Mom," Robin interjected. "And I think if you ask me to leave Paris on a moment's notice to bring Leah here, I deserve at least the courtesy of an explanation."

David exhaled. "Fair enough."

"Tell me one thing first...is Mom okay?"

"No...she's not okay. She's beyond exhausted, Robin. It's why she walked into an oncoming car."

"I don't understand? What's changed?"

"Look, Robin...I'd never ask Anna to give up her career. Part of what made me fall in love with your mother is her passion for what she does. I'm guilty of the same. Establishing a new business is hard enough as it is without spending every spare minute trying find her sister..."

"I thought she stopped trying to find Alex?"

"It's no longer a professional case for her. But that doesn't mean she stopped. Now it's a personal obsession. Between work and Leah and finding Alex there's no room for anything else in her life."

Robin raised her brows. "No room for you, you mean."

David gave her a lopsided smile. "No...no, it's not what I mean. It's not about me feeling jealous. Or left out." He sighed. "God...I wish it were that simple." He gave her another disarming smile. "Then I could just buy a self help book. Or a really fast new car."

Under a ray of sun that burst through the window, Robin suddenly caught the shadows under his eyes, making her realize he was as tired as he sounded. Making her regret her words nearly as soon as she'd said them.

"It isn't even really about Alex. It's about Anna feeling so weighed down by her guilt and regrets, that she's pursuing this at the cost of everything else. At the cost of her health and her family. She could've been killed yesterday when she walked into that oncoming car, do you realize that? _Killed_." He cupped his face in his hands and paused before meeting her eyes. "I can't watch her self destruct, Robin. I just can't do it anymore....I love her too much for that."

* * *

_Later_

Anna Devane winced when she fastened the belt on her bathrobe, stopping just short of biting her lip.

Her ribs were killing her and it was impossible to take a deep breath without her body punishing her for it.

Yet when she thought back to the sleek, black Lincoln town car whose hood she collided with two days ago, she realized that things could've been worse.

She could still be unconscious in a Toronto hospital bed.

Or worse.

A faint knock on the bedroom door made her turn around, and that action too, made her wince.

The sight of Robin's silhouette standing in the doorway, was enough to bring the hint of a smile to her lips. Seeing her beautiful daughter in front of her made her realize that it had been much too long since they'd been on the same side of the globe.

"Hi, Mom."

"Hi, sweetheart."

"Should you be up?"

Anna nodded. "I think it hurts worse to lie down."

"Aw...Mom."

Anna put an around her shoulder. "I'll be fine. Honestly. It's just going to be really sore for a while. All things considered, I got off lucky."

Robin frowned, looking at her as thought she didn't believe a word.

"Sweetheart, believe me. I don't want you to worry."

Robin's face was serious and for a moment Anna couldn't read it.

She used to pride herself on knowing her daughter well enough to be able to read all the subtle nuances on her face. A raising of an eyebrow or pursing of her lips could tell whether she was trying to hide anger, disappointment or irritation. Now she wasn't so sure anymore.

"I owe you an apology for last night," Anna told her. "You flew halfway across the world and I barely gave you a decent hello. I love that you're here, Robin. _Always_. It's just that I didn't feel like David had to scare you into coming here..."

Robin leaned against her drawer. "He _is _scared for you."

Anna frowned as her anger rose. It was one thing to ask _her_ daughter to come to Pine Valley without so much as telling her, it was another altogether to share his unfounded worries with her.

"What exactly did David tell you?"

"Nothing I didn't already guess."

"And what is it that you guessed?"

"You're still trying to find Alex aren't you?" There was a hint of accusation in her voice.

"Yes," Anna shot back, feeling all defensive all of a sudden. "I've never made that a secret."

Robin sighed. Unlike her mother, Robin didn't believe that Alex was still alive.

She didn't think her aunt would have stayed from them if she was. There was no reason for her to think she would. After having spent time with her and Dimitri at Vadsel, Robin didn't think it was possible for Alex to willingly stay away from Dimitri. She'd never seen two people more in love. Then there was Andrei. Crazy, impulsive Andrei whom Alex couldn't have loved more if he were her own flesh and blood. No, she decided, there was no way that Alex would willingly stay away from all of that.

Robin might not have been able to keep a dry eye every time she gave it a moment's thought, but she _had _made peace with the fact that Alex was gone.

The fact that her mother couldn't think straight on this subject if she tried, made Robin want to shake her.

"If Alex were alive she'd let us know. I think I knew her well enough to know that much."

"You don't know everything that happened to her at Alexei Estate...or the state of mind she was in when I last saw her..." Anna said softly.

Robin balled her fist. "It doesn't matter, Mom! Don't you get that? Can't you get that through your thick skull? Alex isn't some WSB spy who's gone into hiding to protect her family or something crazy like that! It's been two years without a word from her! She's...gone. _Dead_."

"I'm sorry, sweetheart...but I don't believe that...."

Robin was crying now, even though it was the last thing she wanted to do.

"You know what I believe, Mom? That if you don't stop this obsession with Alex and Faison, that you're going to lose the only family you have. I think you're going to lose David and that he's going to do everything in his power to take Leah with him." She wiped away a tear with the back of her hand. "I think you need to make a choice...between chasing a lie and fighting for what you have in front of you."

One look at her face told her how much the words stung her mother. But just then Robin didn't care.

"I don't think you're being fair..."

"Fair?" Robin looked at her incredulously. "I spent the first six years of my life not knowing my father! I'd hate to see my baby sister grow up not knowing her mother!"

Knowing she'd crossed a line, she couldn't bear another look at her mother's face.

Instead she'd turned around and slammed the door behind her.

* * *

_Present Day_

Robin cringed when she thought back to that day, wishing there was a way to take back some of the things she'd said.

Her words might've changed things for the better. In fact, Robin was almost certain that they'd been more of a catalyst that her mother would admit. Still, she didn't deserve that kind of tirade.

Some much changed after that day.

Not just with her mother. That morning instigated Robin's decision to finish her studies not at the Sorbonne but at the University of Chicago.

Even so, thinking back to that day filled her with guilt now. 'Especially after what I know now...' Robin thought uncomfortably. 'I convinced you that you were wrong about Alex, when I think I might have been the one that was wrong.'

Reaching the top of the staircase, Robin paused before knocking on the door of her parents' bedroom.

"Come on in," was the cheerful reply.

Robin smiled when she saw David trying to put on a bowtie with mixed success. It was tied in decent looking knot but when he put it around his neck it drooped off to one side.

"Need a hand with that?"

David returned her smile. "Absolutely not. What kind of heart surgeon can't tie a simple knot?"

"This one apparently," Robin answered with a chuckle. Her mother had been right. He looked like a movie star in his all black tuxedo. Together they'd make stunning couple tonight.

"You have to hurry and get changed if you want to try and look as good as us," he told her with a wink.

"I will," Robin told him, serious now. "But first there's something I wanted to talk to you about."

"Sure. Anything." He was still focused on his bowtie and the mirror in front of him.

"It's kind of important..."

Now she had his full attention.

"Alright..." he sat down on the bed, gesturing for her to join him.

Robin took a deep breath, pondering one last time whether she was doing the right thing. Whether this wouldn't change everything all over again. Whether David wouldn't hate her for it.

"Before I show you something, will you promise me not to tell Mom until we know more?"

"Robin?" There was concern etched in his handsome face now. "What's going on? Is it the HIV? Are you alright? Are you having second thoughts about Africa?"

She shook her head. "No, no...I'm fine. It's nothing like that. Please, will you promise me? I need to have your word on this."

He nodded solemnly. "Alright...you have my word."

Robin set her backpack down on his king-size bed, pulling out a file folder from it.

"After Alex...disappeared, I read a lot of her research papers," she started. "I mean, it's not like I understood a whole lot of them. Her field is totally out of my league. But I..." she paused. "I thought it was a way for me to get to know her a little better. By trying to understand something she was really passionate about."

David squeezed her hand. "I understand. I think she'd be flattered."

"The more of her papers I read, the more I thought I was starting to get a feel for her research vision. I started to understand her work a bit better. It was fascinating."

"Alex was a groundbreaking researcher," David added. "A lot of advances in stem cell therapy can be attributed to her ideas. Crazy, radical, brilliant ideas."

Robin opened her file folder and handed twelve sheets of paper, stapled together. "I found this paper online last month. Something about adding anti-oxidants to a certain medium used for the growth in mouse cells."

David glanced at the paper. "And?"

Robin handed him another paper. "Here's a paper Alex published a year before she disappeared. It's about how vitamin C increases the pluripotency of cell populations."

"One's a continuation of the other, is what you're trying to say? That's someone's carrying on Alex's research? That's not unusual or even unlikely..."

"No," Robin corrected him. "I think...I think it's more than that. I think was written by the _same_ person."

"Robin..."

Robin didn't give him a chance. "The second paper was published a month ago in an online journal put out by some Midwestern research centre. Check the name of the author at the end."

David flipped through the pages and Robin could have sworn he was a notch paler when he took a look at the final words.

_A. Merrick, MD, PHD._

"I think all this time Mom may have been right about Alex being alive and..." She took a deep breath. "I need your help to confirm that for me. I need your help finding her."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

_London, England_

* * *

"Are you nervous?" Dimitri Marick asked his son.

Andrei shook his head, taking a swig of his pint. "No."

They were sitting outside, on a giant patio near Covent Garden, watching the tourists and soaking in the sun.

"You know what a win tomorrow means, right?"

Andrei laughed. "Are you _trying_ to make me nervous?"

Dimitri lit a cigarette and smirked. "I think so...'cause frankly your nerves of steel make _me_ uneasy."

"I would be nervous if I had to ride another horse, but I will be riding Tempus, and me and him, we know each other, like this..." he said twisting his fingers together, before reaching to steal one of his father's cigarettes from the silver case. "I will never be nervous riding him."

As his reputation as a jockey grew, Andrei inevitably had to start riding other horses, and he'd notched an admirable number of wins and decent results on other Marick thoroughbreds. But Tempus Fugit was different. That horse was like a second skin to Andrei. The two of them had the kind of inexplicable connection that other jockeys could only envy.

"A win tomorrow means you'll be racing at the Royal Ascot races."

"Geez...I know, Dad! Stop reminding me!" He lit his cigarette with Dimitri's lighter. "Are you going to be there?"

"Of course. Someone's got to cheer you on."

"With Helen?"

Dimitri's smile was lopsided now and he debated how to answer. "Would that be alright with you?"

Andrei shrugged. "Why not?"

Dimitri eyed him quietly, as he exhaled his cigarette smoke. He knew his son so well now. Knew that Andrei had always loved Alex more than he'd admit. For nearly two years Andrei had been as determined to try and find her as Dimitri had been.

But every time they thought they had a lead, they ended up at a dead-end.

Two years later, with Alex still missing, Dimitri realized he had a choice. He could get on with his life, or he could keep banging his head into a wall. While there was many a morning where the latter had more appeal than the former, Dimitri figured he owed his son more than that.

He hadn't taken him from a miserable orphanage in Romania only to offer him a father who'd turned into a brooding, grieving recluse.

So he'd taken baby steps. He started joining one of his many cousins whenever they went out for dinner in Budapest. He didn't allow himself more than one call every couple of days to the investigators he hired to try and find Alex. He began travelling to London more often. Not just to sit in the stands and watch Andrei race, but to rekindle old business contacts. He even went so far as to try and turn those contacts into friendships.

Dimitri also made another attempt at forging some sort of meaningful relationship with Anton, his biological son. The inroads he made on that front, however, were so small they were barely worth mentioning. At least now, on occasion, Anton picked up the phone when his father called, instead of letting him listen to voicemail. But in the end, no matter how hard Dimitri tried, Anton made it clear that he had no real desire to have his father be a part of his life.

Knowing that he'd already lost one son, made him all too aware that he didn't want to lose Andrei too.

None of it had come easily, and in spite of himself, the last image he saw every night was of the one person he still couldn't get out of his mind. The one person he couldn't let go of.

But lately he felt like things were getting better. Afternoons like this one felt less forced now. They felt_ good_.

A few weeks ago he was introduced to the sister of one of his London friends.

Blond, outgoing and indifferent to anything beyond the things she loved, Helen was the polar opposite of Alex. She didn't know the first thing about horses. Or business. Or politics. And she didn't care to.

Where Alex had been serious and cerebral. Helen was fun. Flirtatious. The life of the party.

She'd managed to make him laugh the very first night they went out for drinks together. And because of it, he couldn't resist asking her out following night too. She wasn't shy about letting him know how much she enjoyed his company and that too felt good.

Dimitri wasn't sure whether it would lead to something more serious. He wasn't convinced Helen even wanted that, but right now being in the company of a woman who made him feel something, no matter how primal those feelings were, felt good too. It felt like climbing another rung on a ladder that he desperately needed to scale.

"You sure you don't mind?"

Andrei smirked. "If she makes you happy, then I am happy. You deserve it."

Dimitri swallowed a sip of wine, enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sunshine on his face. Enjoying the feeling of being a father again.

Only a couple of weeks ago Andrei had asked him whether he thought Alex was still alive.

The question had taken him aback and Dimitri wasn't sure whether he owed Andrei an honest answer or one that he needed to hear.

_"I think we have to accept that there's...a chance she may not be."_

It hadn't been what Andrei wanted to hear. In fact, he'd stormed out of his room at Ascot that night, telling Dimitri he was giving up too easily.

But deep down, Dimitri knew it was exactly what his son needed to hear. An acknowledgement from his father that it was okay to stop searching. That it was alright to be happy. To enjoy life as much as he clearly wanted to.

It's what Dimitri wanted for him.

Even if he'd answered the question with a lie.

Dimitri didn't believe Alex was dead.

Sure there were angry, bitter moments when he tried to reason to himself that he was wrong. That she had to be gone, because the Alex he knew couldn't possibly be so cruel as to stay away from them all this time unless she was dead. The woman he'd loved wouldn't willingly put them through the kind of agony they'd lived through the last two years.

But even then, during those moments, that was still one rung in the ladder he wasn't ready to climb yet.

In fact, without hard evidence, he wasn't sure it was one he'd ever be ready for.

Not when every instinct told him she wasn't dead.

They sat and chatted some more and Andrei reached for another cigarette from Dimitri's pack.

Dimitri grabbed his lighter before Andrei got to it.

"Didn't you say you were going to quit?"

"They're not mine. It doesn't count."

Dimitri raised his brows. "In that case I give them to you."

Andrei laughed. "You're supposed to quit to before me. That was the deal."

"I've already cheated death once. If some rare prion disease won't kill me, these things definitely won't."

"Maybe..." Andrei emptied his beer glass. "But this time Alex is not here to save your butt."

Dimitri sighed. "Good point." He handed Andrei the lighter. "Alright, we finish these and then that's it? Deal?"

Andrei shrugged and gave his father a sly smile. "How about this...I win tomorrow, we stop. If I don't..." he smirked. "Then we...wait until the next race."

_Seaview Hospital, Pine Valley, PA_

* * *

David picked up the phone and dialled the number a second time. "I know you're there, Levy. Just answer the damn thing."

Answer he did. On the fourth ring.

"Yeah?"

David chuckled. "Am I interrupting?"

"Who is this?"

"Hayward," he shot back.

"_The_ David Hayward? Well, I'll be damned...I haven't seen you in what? Seven years?"

David didn't feel like small talk. "Remember the experiment with Brombeck? When you swore you owed me one? I've decided to take you up on it."

There was silence on the other end and David could hear his ex-colleague breathing.

"Look, Hayward...I know you saved that project. But the kind of research you do...I don't do that anymore. I haven't for a long time."

David bit his tongue. Sometimes his current respectability made him forget that he had a past that was anything but respectable. "Levy...it's nothing like that. There's a researcher I'm trying to get to know better. I want to contact her without her knowing that I'm trying to contact her."

"I don't understand."

"Stem cell research is still your baby isn't it?"

"My 'baby'?" There was no mistaking the indignation in his voice. "In case you haven't heard, I got the Garrett Innovation Grant last year."

David didn't recognize the award, but he figured it was something big. "I take it that's a yes?"

"Yes, take that as a yes...look, Hayward, I'm insanely busy right now."

"I'll make it quick then," David shot back. "I'm going to e-mail you an article and I want you to contact the author."

"What?"

"It's a research article, and, stem cell therapy...it's just not my thing, you understand? I wouldn't know where to start having a conversation that would catch her attention. You on the other hand..."

"_Why_ do you want me to contact the author?"

"Just read the article and then ask her about it. Pick her brain. Pretend that you're interested in her theories...and then I want you to forward me your e-mails."

"I don't get it...why? Who is this author? Is this some chick you're trying to pick up."

David chuckled. "No, no... nothing like that."

"Who is she?"

"Dr. Alexia Merrick."

"Never heard of her," Levy told him and this time David could sense the irritation on the other end.

"She's brilliant."

"If she was brilliant I'd know her."

David had to bite his tongue. Maybe it was time to remind him why he was asking. "Look, I don't like calling in favours. But this one's important. _Really_ important. Kind how it was important for you to take over the Fresno lab for a week and for me to make sure you could."

There was silence on the other end and David cringed. It was a not-so-thinly veiled reminder that if it wasn't for his wheelings and dealings one of Rosenberg's early studies might never have gone as far as it did. Might never have elevated his career the way it did. It was exactly the kind of half-threat he used to utter all the time, and the sort of commodities he used to love trading in. Except now they left a bitter taste in his mouth.

"Send me the e-mail," was the strained acknowledgement at the other end. "I'll get on it as soon as I have a free moment."

"Look, I appreciate it..." David tried knowing it was too late for pleasantries now. He'd already crossed the line.

"Is there anything else?"

"No."

"I'll copy you on what I send her."

There was no good-bye as Rosenberg hung up the phone and David frowned.

For a moment he felt like a stranger in his own skin. He felt like the David-he-used-to-be.

"I hope this is worth it," he mumbled to no one. "I hope this brings your sister back, Anna..."

_London, England_

* * *

_They were walking along a beach. _

_It was chilly and there were no palm trees. _

_Tall, green beach grass covered the sand dunes on one side of them and ice cold waves lapped against the golden beach on the other. Olive-grey peaks jutted out across the water; most of them uninhabited islands that dotted the shoreline. _

_In spite of the striking scenery, his gaze was focused on her. When a crisp, salty gust of air blew her hair across her face, it made him smile. _

_Her hair was long again, the way he loved it. Long enough that he could run his fingers through it. _

_She wore a thick, white wool turtle-neck sweater and her hand was firmly clasped in his._

_"Isn't it beautiful?"_

_"Yes, you are." _

_"It's not what I meant..." _

_He smiled. "I know." _

_Alex smiled at him in return and cupped his face in her hands, kissing his lips unexpectedly. "I love you so much." _

_He liked the feel of her lips against his, and the way the wind tossed her hair into his face. It all felt so good. So warm and familiar. If it were up to him, they'd stay like this forever. Walking along a deserted beach in northern Scotland. With her lips on his, and the wind sweeping the salty air into their lungs. _

_"I have to go." _

_Her words came from nowhere, shocking him. _

_"What do you mean?" _

_"I have to leave you. I'm sorry, but I have to..." _

_He held on to her hand tighter, but it was futile. She slipped from his grasp with ease, as though her flesh was made of the same sand as the beach under his feet. _

_She was walking towards the water. Into the ice-cold waves. He could see the water seep through her jeans. _

_"Alex, stop!" _

_He tried to run after her, but he couldn't. _

_His legs were immobile, sinking into the sand below. It wasn't a beach anymore. It was quicksand. _

_"Alex! Don't go!" _

_She kept walking further. Into the water. It came up to her shoulders now. _

_She turned around once more. Her smile was gone and she looked afraid. "I love you so much." _

_It was the last thing she said before a wave swept over her._

_Drowning her. _

"No!"

Dimitri tossed the blanket off, gasping for air. Wanting to run out of the room.

Into the ocean, after her.

"Hey..." A sleepy voice in the dark. "Is something wrong?"

"No..." Dimitri managed, his voice sounding foreign to his ears. "I'm just going to get up and get a drink of water."

"Okay..." was the yawning response.

Dimitri quietly left the bedroom, knowing the way in the dark all too well from the many sleepless nights he'd spent here. He lived in Alex's old London flat now. The flat they'd kept saying they were going to sell in order to buy a house further afield, so as to have a real, permanent home in London.

It was just one more thing they never got around to doing.

Dimitri turned on the tap and waited for the water to get cold, before pouring it into his glass.

_Ice cold. Like the waves on that beach._

Dimitri took a large sip and then held the glass against his cheek, letting the glass cool him.

How could he still miss her somuch? How could he want her so badly that he'd have given an arm in exchange for a few minutes in the same room with her?

_What about you, Alex? Do you ever think of me? _

He wondered whether she missed him even half as much as he missed her.

He swallowed another sip of water before he angrily threw the glass back into the sink.

"Obviously not. Or else you'd be here."

He thought he heard it smash, but didn't care to even look. He'd clean it up in the morning.

"Damn you, Alex," he whispered. "Damn you for leaving us and for not trusting me enough to even give us half a chance. "

He lit a cigarette in the dark, and smoked it in silence, waiting for his heart to stop pounding before silently going back to the bedroom.

Helen had turned on the bedside lamp and was sitting up when he got back.

"I was about to send out a search party..." she told him.

Dimitri pulled back the covers to join her back in the bed. "I'm sorry. I needed some air."

Helen wrinkled her small, perfect nose. "You needed to pace and brood and have a cigarette."

Dimitri smiled a lopsided smile. "That too."

She yawned and sank back onto the pillow. "What do you dream about all the time anyway?" It was the first time she asked him.

He was lying on his back now, staring at the ceiling. "Nothing important."

"Are you fretting about that race tomorrow?"

He looked at his Longines watch, the hands glowing in the dark. "That would be the race _today_."

Helen's fingers ran through his hair, more interested in him than in his response. "Oh..."

"Will you come with me?" he asked her. He'd asked her before and she said no. Horse races bored her to tears, she argued. That and she had work to finish at the office this weekend.

"Oh Dimitri, I've got to get this report finished. And the perfect time to do it is over the weekend, when no one's in the office to distract me. You know I get distracted way too easy."

"Please? It would mean a lot to me..."

Helen sighed. "Fine. But only if you take me to dinner at the Savoy on Saturday."

Dimitri grinned. "It's closed for renovations, but I'll try and find something comparable."

"But why Dimi? You know I could care less about horses running in a circle and I haven't got a clue how to read those racing forms. Besides, people are going to wonder about us if you show up at these things with me."

_I want you to come because watching Andrei race with Tempus makes me miss her even more._

_I want you to come because I desperately need a distraction. Because today is about Andrei not about missing Alex. _

He squeezed her hand. "That's okay. Let them wonder."

_Vancouver, Canada_

* * *

Alexandra Marick tip-toed down the stairs, purposely not turning on the lights because she knew Maria liked to sleep with the door of her room open. She knew the stairway light would shine right into it, waking her.

Her good intentions flew out the window when she accidentally stepped on a toy truck in the darkness, sending it careening down sixteen steps. It made a clanking noise on every single one of them until it finally settled, upside down, on the bottom.

Alex cringed.

It didn't take more than a few seconds for the old, Spanish woman to come running out of her room, turning on the light, blinding Alex.

_"Alejandra! Ay caramba! Que haces?"_

Alex squinted in the light. "Sorry...it's just me. Go back to sleep."

"Sleep? After I almost have a heart attack? If you are trying to kill me, next time you take a pillow, you put it over my head and then you push down! That's what normal people do. Not this, Alejandra! Let me be asleep when you do it!"

Alex laughed. "God, you're dramatic."

Maria waved her hands in the air. "Why you are sneaking around your own house like a thief? What time is it anyway?"

"It's almost four. The race is going to start soon. I told you last night I was going to watch it."

"_Si..si._ I remember now. You and your horses."

Alex put her hand on Maria's shoulder. "I'm sorry I woke you. Will you try and go back to sleep?"

The older woman gave her an indignant look. "No, I will not sleep. I will go and make sure your noise didn't wake Liam, then I will make us a coffee, and I want to see your horse win. That horse that you always watch at crazy times."

"Fine," Alex relented. "Come watch with me. Grab a robe, and I'll go check on Liam."

There was a time not that long ago when she'd have been instantly uncomfortable with the thought of having company when she wanted to be left alone.

But tonight it didn't bother her. She liked the thought of maybe sharing Andrei's victory with the woman who'd helped her through the worst two years of her life.

'You've come a long way,' Alex realized. She knew she still had a ways to go, but she was getting there. Finally.

She walked back upstairs and into her son's room, a smile lifted her lips when she saw that he was sleeping with his head resting on the palm of his hand.

Alex gently moved his hand and watched him stir in his sleep. "You are too cute, my little man," she whispered. She wasn't surprised that the noise hadn't woken him. Liam could sleep through anything, including the blaring of the ships' horns across Coal Harbour that often woke her at night.

She couldn't resist bending down to give him a kiss. "Sweet dreams. Of your brother winning his race."

Alex left his room and closed the door behind her, shuddering when she thought back to how close she'd been to not having him in her life.

After she left Moscow two years ago, Alex wanted an abortion. There were few things she was certain of at the time but that was one of them. She went to three different clinics, but in the end, couldn't go through with any of her attempts.

Later, near the end of her pregnancy, Alex convinced herself that adoption was her only alternative.

She could only guess it was near the end because of her size, as she really had no clue when the due date was. There hadn't been a single medical appointment since the emergency room doctor had told her she was expecting. Not one since she left Moscow a complete mess and completely unable to deal with the post-traumatic stress. Or with the thought of her mother coming after her. Or of Faison finding out that she was carrying his child.

Alex had no clue what adoption entailed for the mother giving up the child. She decided she would just leave the hospital after giving birth. One thing was certain, she didn't want Faison's child. But at the same time the baby deserved a chance at happiness. It wasn't the baby's fault that its father was a monster. The best thing she could do for that child's safety and happiness was to make sure it never knew its father.

But the day he was born, Alex couldn't bring herself to do that either.

One look into the boy's dark eyes and she realized that she wasn't looking at Faison's son.

Or Dimitri's.

It was _her_ son she was holding in her arms.

Holding him after all these months was an indescribable feeling. Unlike like any other she'd ever experienced.

One minute in her arms and she'd have given her life for him, if that's what it took to protect him.

It was a love so strong and so unexpected, it took her breath away.

Alex hadn't thought of a name. Hadn't even thought she'd be the one to choose one.

There was a glossy, entertainment magazine lying on the bedside table in the hospital. It had an actor whose first name was Liam on the cover. That's what she picked when the doctor asked her.

It was an impulse decision, but now, nearly two years later, Alex was happy with it. It suited the little boy she fell in love with all over again, every day.

While Alex might not have made a single sane decision while she was pregnant, seeing that by some miracle, she gave birth to a healthy child in spite of it all, made her realize that Liam deserved much better than she'd given him so far.

Finding Maria and convincing the stubborn Spanish woman to help her raise the newborn baby, was the one good decision she made since leaving Moscow in a haze of confusion.

"It is starting!" she heard Maria yell from downstairs. "Hurry up."

When Alex took her seat next to Maria, the horses were in the process of entering the track. Andrei and Tempus were the second ones to come in, and as was the case with every race she managed to catch, the sight of her son and his horse about to race gave her goose bumps.

Maria handed her a bowl of coffee. "I made you some _cafe con leche_. With a little _canela _on top. The way you like it early in the morning."

"Thank you," Alex told her, taking the cup into her hands. It was only since living with Maria that she started to love the smell of fresh coffee.

Alex couldn't take her eyes off the TV screen.

The way Andrei rode Tempus was so natural, the two of them were seamless together. One complimented the other to make a perfect whole. Alex set down her coffee and bit her nails as the horses neared the starting gate.

_Come on, Andrei. You can do it. You're the most amazing rider I've ever met_.

"Did we bet money on your horse?"

"No."

"Why not? If you are so sure he is going to win."

"I'm not _sure_...I just really want him to."

For an instant Alex wondered if Dimitri was there, in the stands, watching the race.

She smiled at the thought. Of course he was. The man she knew and loved wouldn't miss this for the world. This one was too big to miss.

She was surprised that the TV camera hadn't zoomed in on him yet. Dimitri Marick was more than a minor celebrity in the world of thoroughbred racing, and Tempus Fugit was one of the favourites going into the race today.

As if someone could read her mind, the next close-up wasn't of some British aristocrat, it was of Dimitri.

Alex's heart skipped a beat.

These last few months, there wasn't a day that went by that she didn't want to go back to him. Just to feel his arms around her again. To let him know she couldn't stand missing him this much any more.

The camera zoomed in on him, standing up, leaning into the course from his seat, too excited to sit down.

It also zoomed in on _her_. The tall, good-looking blonde woman standing next to him, her arm hooked into his.

Alex's heart caught in her throat.

_He found someone else_.

It shouldn't have surprised her. She told herself more than once that she wanted as much. Wanted him to be happy.

Still the sight of him with someone else triggered something in her that she wasn't ready for. Longing, anger, regret. All three emotions hit her with a force that made her want to run out of the room and catch the next flight to London.

For the first time in a long time she wanted to fight. Relished the thought even. Fight for what she loved and lost.

Her eyes watered again against her will.

_He didn't leave you, idiot. You left him. _

Even so, the knowledge hurt more than she thought it would.

Unblinking, she forced herself to focus on the TV screen, hoping that Maria wouldn't notice. The camera had panned back to the racetrack.

The horses were in the gate now and Alex couldn't make out Andrei anymore. He was hidden behind the bars, next to the other riders. Her heart was pounding.

The pistol fired and the horses sped off.

_Come on, Andrei. Come on!_

He was in third place after the first turn. Only a few hands back from the second horse, Alex knew he could make it up at the next turn.

The horse behind him pushed ahead of Andrei, putting him in fourth.

Alex jumped to her feet.

"Come on, Andrei! Push him, Tempus can handle it."

As if he heard her, Andrei pushed ahead, neck and neck with the horse that just passed him.

"Now take the next turn on the_ outside_," Alex whispered. "Tempus is fast enough to make up the extra distance."

This time he didn't take her advice, taking the next turn on the inside. It was the riskier move, but Alex should've known that would've made it the obvious choice for him.

She cringed as he brushed dangerously close to the next rider. "Better to lose than injure Tempus."

Even so he was in second place now with only one turn to go.

The first rider wasn't more than two yards ahead of him. It was a lot of catching up in a short distance and Alex had a feeling he wouldn't push it more than he had to. The first two horses would both get a chance to race at Royal Ascot next month, the Kentucky Derby of the United Kingdom.

"Stay with him, but stop pushing," Alex mouthed.

This time Andrei seemed to agree. He was at least a yard ahead of the third rider and crossed the finish line a comfortable second.

Alex smiled, feeling the tension ease from her shoulders. "Beautiful run, champ."

She barely heard Maria setting down her tiny espresso cup on the coffee table. But Alex did catch her serious expression when she turned to her. "Hey...this is good news, it's great. Even though he came in second. It means he races Royal Ascot!"

Maria's face was sombre. "Why this boy and this horse means so much to you?"

Alex raised her brows. "What do you mean?"

"Is he your son?"

This time Alex was speechless. For as long as she'd known her now, Maria had always been brutally honest and, at times, exasperatingly perceptive. Two traits that hadn't always been easy too stomach, but two traits she'd desperately needed in a friend these days.

That said, she wasn't ready to have_ this_ conversation just yet.

"Maria...I don't know what you're talking about."

The old woman had her arms folded defensively. "You are not answering my question."

Alex frowned. "You're right, I'm not answering that question."

"_Alejandra_! You said you are going to be honest with me."

_That's why I'm not answering your question. _

Alex took a long sip of her _cafe con leche_ and then got up from the sofa. "I'm going to go for a run."

Maria looked at her as though she announced she was going bungee jumping. _"_At four in the morning? _Estas loca?" _

"I'll be back before Liam wakes up..."

"Don't go, please." This time there was something else written all over her face. _Fear_. "I will not ask you any more questions. Just go back to bed, Alejandra. Please..."

"Look, I'll be fine. Lots of people jog in Stanley Park in the morning..." And then it dawned on her that Maria wasn't afraid that something sinister would happen to her in the early morning. It was something else.

The last time she went for a late night jog in Sydney she didn't come back until two days later.

_I wanted to keep running that night. _

_Running. And running and running. Away from everything. _

Alex closed her eyes, hating what she'd put Maria through. Wishing she could somehow make it up to her. Knowing she couldn't. And it wasn't just Maria. It was everyone else she loved and hurt by disappearing from their lives. Not just for two days, but nearly two years.

The old woman's eyes were close to tears now. "I think maybe it was a mistake that you stopped taking the medication."

Alex took a deep breath and put her hands on Maria's shoulders.

That was something else she'd just as soon forget. The anti-depressants she needed to take after Liam's birth in order to function. Followed by her decision, to go off them nearly a year later, when she realized that feeling nothing wasn't an option anymore. Even at the risk of falling back into the abyss. It was better to hurt, than feel nothing at all. Even if the ensuing withdrawal made her sick enough that she nearly changed her mind halfway through.

_But I didn't. _

_I made it. _

_I came this far because I trusted my instincts. _

_Now it's time to let others know they can trust me too. _

"No. It was definitely the right decision," Alex said softly. "I'm going for a run and then I'll be back. Then you can ask me again, and I hope I'll be ready to answer, okay?"

Maria nodded, wanting to believe her.

Alex kissed the old woman on the cheek, and managed a smile. "I'll be back before he wakes up. Promise."

* * *

Authors note: Sorry for the delay in updating! Been busier than I was hoping to be! I'm aiming for an update every two weeks, but it might occasionally be longer than that, so thanking you in advance for you patience! Thanks too to my two editors, Annie and Kel. You may now blame all typos, grammatical and factual errors and storyline inconsistencies on them. (I kid!). Thanks for reading. :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 **

_Vancouver, Canada _

* * *

Alex didn't make it all the way around the nearly fourteen mile Seawall in Vancouver's Stanley Park. She stopped to catch her breath two-thirds of the way through.

Sweat dripped down her neck and her heart pounded from the exertion.

There wasn't another soul on the trail this morning. It was still dark outside; there was a blanket of trees to her right and an equally dark ocean to her left.

Alex took a deep breath and stared out into the Pacific.

She used to be night owl, rarely getting up at the crack of dawn, but the last few months, during which she forced herself to stick to an exercise routine, had changed that. Dawn was her favourite time of day now. She liked that time when the day still felt fresh and new, just before the sun came up and the rest of the world woke up.

Usually gazing out into the ocean gave her a sense of calm, but today the only thing she saw was the image of Dimitri with that woman. The blond, beautiful woman on his arm.

_Do you miss me at all?_

Lights glimmered in the distance of the vast English Bay. Alex counted twelve. Each of them was a cargo ship patiently waiting to enter the harbour.

She kept staring out into the ocean, taking in the salty smell of the sea and the sound of the waves lapping against the park's rocky edges.

It was a very different climate here from that of Sydney, where she first attempted to run in the mornings. It was colder and harsher here, but rather than defeat her intentions it had the opposite effect. It had spurned her on.

She hadn't survived a youth full of Welsh winters, only to give in the wet, chilly days of Canada's West Coast.

As if to remind her of the challenge, it was starting to drizzle now. A cool, pre-dawn rain sprinkled her face.

"God, no wonder, I'm the only one here."

She probably should've been afraid to jog alone through Vancouver's answer to Central Park in the middle of the night, but after being kidnapped by Faison and thinking she'd lost her mind; a night time forest was rather far down on her list of fears.

Alex moved to sit down on a bench, right at the rim of the forest. The bench was barely visible from the running trail in the dark, but she knew it was there because it wasn't the first time she used it as a rest stop. In fact, it was her favourite spot in this new city that she now called home.

Alex pulled back the sleeve of her sweat shirt to reveal a permanent reminder of her time with Faison. The vile, branded tattoo that no plastic surgeon would be able to remove without transplanting the skin on her entire arm.

_Alexandra._

Raindrops fell on every single letter and ran down the length of her arm, dripping onto the ground below.

It was hard to decipher them. The infection she had after the branding had made a mess of Faison's handiwork. The letters blurred into one another now, the 'x' nearly swallowed

the 'a' that followed and the 'r' lost it's upper curve, nearly turning into an 'i'.

At first glance it looked more like _Alexndia. _

It had taken months for her to work up the nerve to look at it without flinching. Without having it take her back to that day and tormenting her.

_"I hear your friends call you Alex. It's too bad I'm not your friend, Alexandra." _

But now she could look at it and get angry rather than afraid. It reminded her that Faison was still out there, and that if he knew she was raising his son, he'd do everything he could to take Liam away from her.

"I'll kill you if you try..." she whispered to no one.

Alex knew it was that subconscious, maternal fear that had made her flee as much as anything else. Long before she even decided to keep her baby.

The thought of Faison finding her and Liam still terrified her and because of it she'd kept her small family on the run. Every eight months they would move. She started in Glasgow. Then Sydney. Now Vancouver. All the furthest corners of the world.

_What next? Tokyo? Novosibirsk? _

"Not bloody likely," she thought with a chuckle. Given her lack of linguistic skills, she knew she had to limit herself to English speaking countries. Preferably members of the Commonwealth, where she'd have an easier time getting in as a British citizen.

"Maybe it's time to stop running. Time to face Faison and let him know I'm not afraid."

Anna and Sean had the means to protect her and Liam. So did Dimitri. If he'd forgive her.

_Who are you kidding? Anna couldn't keep her own daughter safe from Faison? What makes you think she could protect Liam from him? _

Alex closed her eyes as she remembered another early morning run, in Sydney, when she first staring jogging. When she still dreaded being in her own skin and facing her home at the end of the day. She wanted to run far away from it all.

And she did.

For two days she kept walking along the coast. Until sunburnt, exhausted and dehydrated she finally had the good sense to take a bus back home to her son and Maria.

The old Spanish woman had been frantic and tearful. Wanting to call the police but knowing it wasn't an option. She'd hugged her and yelled at her, and, in the end, she'd taken care of her as though Alex was her daughter.

The thought brought another bittersweet smile to Alex's face. _My own mother would never have done what you did, Maria. _

Things were different now.

She wasn't terrified of being herself anymore. She wanted to go home to be with her son. Her funny, charming, beautiful son.

"You also have to go home and work," she reminded herself. She was hoping to finagle her way into joining a research team at the University of British Columbia, in an attempt begin re-establishing a research reputation again. Not as Alexandra Devane, but as the alias she'd been using the past two years, Alexia Merrick.

Alex Devane would have had no trouble getting access to the best research labs in the country and her papers wouldn't be rejected by the best medical journals, but Alex Merrick had to find ways of getting access to third rate labs and she needed to be persistent and pushy to get something published in publications that barely anyone read.

The truth was her financial reserves were running dangerously low. Over a year of not working while supporting three people had all but depleted her savings.

That too, was a new world for her.

While she might have lacked a lot of things in her life, money was never one of them. Not while she was a practising physician and certainly not while being married to one of Europe's richest men.

"You still are..." she reminded herself. "Married to him."

She glanced down at her exquisite wedding band. At the tiny diamonds that ran along the inside of it. It was one thing she hadn't thought to purge from her past life, even when she wanted to throw away everything else.

She probably should have pawned it to pay for the rusting, used car she bought last week, instead of letting it nearly deplete her account. But she knew she'd sooner make cappuccinos at a coffee chain than do that.

_If you won't let go of him, then find a way back to him. Stop living in limbo. He deserves to know you're alive. He deserves that and more. Dimitri and Andrei both do. And so do Anna and Robin. _

A month ago, she'd been so close to calling him. But she couldn't go through with it.

_Because you're a coward. Because you didn't think you could handle him not forgiving you for what you did. _

It was raining harder now and Alex was soaked to her skin.

It wasn't about him forgiving her anymore, she realized. It was about her family deserving the truth. If she lost Dimitri in the process, she'd have to deal with it.

_As it stands now, I've already lost him anyway. _

Alex stood up, smiling when she saw another lone jogger stop in the exact same spot where she stopped her run earlier. Staring out into the bay, just as she'd done.

It was time to stop hiding in fear. It was time to make her way back into the world of the living.

But not because she was broke.

"First," she mumbled to herself. "You're going to find a way to pay the rent next month."

_Kigali, Rwanda_

* * *

It was almost two in the morning. A fan whirred above his head.

Next to his desktop, the ice cubes had melted in his scotch on the rocks, leaving behind a half glass full of diluted light brown liquor. Half a sandwich also sat untouched on a plate next to it.

He'd been too engrossed on what he was seeing on the computer to notice either of them.

Robert Scorpio had promised Sandrine they'd leave early in the morning to see her sister's family.

Still, he couldn't tear himself away.

For the first time in a long time, he felt that he wasn't following a dead end.

"It makes sense for him to be there."

Faison's primary dealings these past two years had shifted away from Europe and Russia, and towards the Far East. There was a casino in Macau. An import-export company on the island of Hainan. Thoroughbreds in Hong Kong. A brothel in Taipei.

None of them could be directly linked to Cesar Faison of course, but Robert had done enough digging that he'd have bet his life on it that Faison was the puppeteer pulling the strings behind each of them.

Robert could smell the scent of her jasmine perfume, giving her away, before he heard the sound of her bare feet, approaching him from behind. He smiled when he felt her hands massaging his shoulders.

"It makes sense for who to be where?" she asked.

"Faison," Robert told her. He pointed to a map on his computer. "There are two remote island groups in the northern Philippines. The Batan and the Babuyan islands. The population is less than 30,000 on all the islands combined. Life there is pretty simple. We're talking remote fishing outposts, some of which don't even have electricity and running water."

"What does this have to do with Cesar Faison?"

"I've been trying to track his cyber activity, and I've been finding that much of it traces back to an island so small it's not even on a map. An island that's part of the Babuyan Islands in the Philippines. Consistent cyber activity from a region that's barely inhabited or supplied with electricity? _That_ made me take a second look."

"You think he set up his new headquarters there?" Sandrine yawned and pulled up a chair next to him. "Two months ago you were convinced he was in Kazakhstan..."

"Kyrgyzstan," he corrected her, cringing at the thought of that futile trip. The number of dead end leads on that mission had turned it into the ultimate wild goose chase. "In hindsight, I should have realized that Kyrgyzstan made no sense. But given where all his latest business ventures are, the northern Philippines makes a lot of sense. Having your own private island within a hop, skip and jump from both Hong Kong and Taipei, is pretty ideal. Aside from the occasional typhoon, the climate is ideal too, and unlike in the 'stans there's no political chaos to contend with."

Sandrine frowned. "So this means you are going to the Philippines to find him now?"

Robert smiled and kissed her forehead. "Well, I didn't exactly book a flight yet."

Her frown deepened. "It's not funny. The last time you took off to kill him, he almost killed you instead."

"Russia was different. I went to rescue someone, not kill Faison." He pulled her towards him. "This time I'll return the favour by doing more than almost killing him."

Sandrine lowered her head, unwilling to meet his eyes.

He lifted her chin with hand. "Hey...you know I have to do this."

Her expression was sullen. "Yes, you were always honest with me about your obsession with him. I accept it and put up with it because I love you. But that doesn't mean I have to agree with it, or even like it."

Robert moved to turn off the computer. He had a feeling he wouldn't get any more work done tonight. It was too late anyway. He finished the rest of his diluted drink and sighed. "Fair enough."

"It's not just about keeping you around for me anymore, you know," she added, still pouting.

Robert smiled and gently ran his hand over her pregnant belly. It awed him all over again each time he did. Sandrine was due in less than three months now. "I have one more reason to end this forever," he said softly. "The best reason of all. I need to know that my little girl will be safe from him."

Finally Sandrine managed a smile. "Stop calling our son a girl."

Robert was convinced it was going to be a girl, and Sandrine was equally convinced that it would be a boy. Both of them preferred to argue about it rather than have an amniocentesis give them the answer.

"I need to know that there's no chance that psychopath will one day decide to come back into my life in order to take away that which means the most to me. Because he's done it before."

"So you're going to kill him as a pre-emptive measure? That's illegal you know."

"So is killing for revenge." Robert shrugged. "But either one will do for me."

Sandrine's smile was gone. "All this talk of killing makes me scared and sad. It doesn't sound like the man I love. I wish you could just..."

Robert put an index finger on her lips. This was one argument he wasn't geared for tonight. Not after making his biggest find in months. "You wish I would just shut up and come to bed with you? But not before I bring you a glass of warm milk and rub your tired feet?"

Sandrine's eyes smiled. "You think it is so easy to change the subject with me?"

"How about some warm milk, a foot massage and a romantic movie? I'll even suffer through a late night viewing of Casablanca if you let me off the hook?"

Sandrine laughed. "No movie. Early morning visit to Marie-Therese, remember?"

Robert groaned. "Right, how could I forget..."

He wrapped his arms around her growing waist, glad that she stopped grilling him about Faison.

_Vancouver, Canada_

* * *

Alex was still soaked by the time she got back to the townhouse.

She hoped that Maria might have gone back to bed and that she could sneak into the shower without her noticing.

No such luck.

The old woman was sitting in the living room, her wrinkled hands wrapped around a large mug of coffee, and the relief on her face was painfully obvious, even though she tried to look at Alex as if she wasn't the least bit surprised to see her back.

"Were you the only _mujer loca_ running in the woods, in the middle of the night, during the pouring rain?"

Alex held back a smile. "No. There was at least one other one." She was getting better at deciphering the Spanish that Maria always threw into her conversation. Occasionally Alex could even reply with a word or two in Spanish of her own.

"Go take a hot shower, get some dry clothes before you catch pneumonia, and I will make you another coffee."

"Okay, Mom."

Maria narrowed her brows, "Not funny. You should be so lucky to have me fuss over you."

Alex did smile this time. "I am." She was about to walk up the stairs to take a peak into Liam's room, when she heard Maria say something else.

"_Alejandra_..."

Alex turned around. "Yes?"

"I'm sorry, about before. I was being nosy," she said softly. "I have no right."

"Sure you do."

"No, I don't. Just because act like your mother, doesn't mean that I am... your mother."

Alex sat down on the staircase and brushed a wet strand of hair behind her ears. Her hair had grown long again, after she cut it short on impulse two years ago, not wanting to look like her sister anymore. That is, until she realized it was herself she was running from, not Anna. That she liked her hair long as much as her sister did.

"You asked me a question before I left..."

"You really should get out of your wet clothes," Maria repeated, cutting her off. Letting her know she didn't need to answer.

"The boy riding the horse, the one I always root for... he _is_ my son," she admitted softly. "Your instincts were right. His name is Andrei and I miss him. I miss him a lot."

Maria looked as though her heart might break. "Oh _mi hija_..."

"I'm not sure how to make my way back to him yet," Alex added. "But I have to...and I will. I just need a little bit more time."

Maria slumped her shoulders. Alex knew she'd have given her a fierce hug if she'd let her.

"Oh Alejandra...if I can help you..."

"You help me every day," she told her. "But things are complicated...and it's not only about me wanting to be with him. It's about keeping Liam safe too."

_Later_

* * *

Alex sat in front of her computer and yawned. Checking her e-mail was a quick affair these days. It was rare that she found more than a message or two in her inbox.

Liam was on her lap and drove a toy car in front of her keyboard.

"Boom!" he announced when it fell off the table edge.

Alex kissed the top of his head, enjoying the smell of baby shampoo and the soft, silkiness of his dark hair against her lips. Simple sensory pleasures that she wouldn't have enjoyed or even picked up on a few months ago. "That's it. No more car for you."

He looked up at her and grinned, as though he couldn't care less. He had a smile that lit up his whole face. One that made it impossible not to smile at him in return.

Alex expected him to jump off her lap and go after the car, but instead he stayed put, lazily draping an arm over hers, entranced by the screen in front of them.

She clicked on a new message, surprised at what she saw. The mail came from a Dr. Levy Rosenberg, whose signature indicated he was a lead researcher at a lab in San Francisco. Unlike the handful of questions she'd gotten from med students who'd read her articles and wanted to verify basic procedural steps, this one offered several thoughts on her theories.

The prospect of discussing stem cell research theories with someone of that calibre suddenly excited her. It felt like a lifetime since she'd interacted with a top level researcher on equal terms.

"If I could get my foot back in the door in_ that_ world, I might not have to worry about the rent anymore..." she told Liam, who was pressing down on bunch of letters on the key board now. "Unless I send him an e-mail back with your gibberish."

Even so, as soon as the excitement hit her, so did the fear.

She'd spent so much time making sure she was invisible to Cesar Faison and Charlotte Devane, she had to careful not to let her guard down now.

The thought of either of them having found her, and contacting through these means, sent a shiver up her spine. Liam sensed her tension and he squirmed out of her lap, running after the toy car that was halfway across the room now.

"Let's do some digging first and find out whether this Levy Rosenberg actually exists," Alex mumbled softly.

_London, England_

_The next day_

* * *

"Can you believe it?" Helen said, after hanging up the phone. "Harry Winston invited me to a marketing forum for Lloyds? I thought he was just blowing hot air when he mentioned it at the races. The chief executive officer of bloody Lloyds!"

She poured herself a glass of cognac from his decanter and raised it, toasting with the air, as Dimitri wasn't having one.

Dimitri smiled. "So you're glad you came along after all?"

"It wasn't just him, Dimi. The people we chatted with that day...it's unbelievable. The Earl of Essex, the chairman of Boots, some Lord from York that flew in from Dubai for the day...I could swear, Dimi, the entire who's who of the United Kingdom was at Ascot yesterday."

Andrei was in the room too and he eyed her. "There were some horse races too."

Dimitri couldn't hold back a chuckle.

Helen didn't seem to hear him. "Tilly's going to be so damn jealous."

Dimitri got up to give her a kiss. "Have a good time with her at the spa."

Helen was still beaming. "I will." She turned to Andrei, "Bye, Andrei. Good seeing you."

"Bye, Helen." Andrei raised his brows after she left. "Did you forget to tell her I was racing?"

"Shh..." Dimitri motioned with his fingers, letting Andrei know she was still within earshot.

Andrei raised his arms in defence. "I know she doesn't care about racing. But yesterday was a _big_ race. She should pretend better," he told him. "Not for me, for you."

"Look, she_ loved_ being there," Dimitri added. "That's more than I expected."

Andrei shrugged. "Okay."

Dimitri eyed him. "Aren't you supposed to be in class?"

"Nope," he shot back. "Elliott is sick with the flu and he finds no one to take his place." He shrugged again, with a smile this time. "It's too bad for me. I really wanted to do math inside. Instead, I have to go outside in this beautiful day and spend it with Tempus..."

Dimitri snickered. Elliott was Andrei's private tutor and Dimitri wasn't surprised to hear that he was sick. Again. The old man looked more pale, thin and frazzled every time Dimitri saw him. A few more months and hopefully Andrei would have his secondary school equivalency diploma. That is, if Elliott lived to see his prize pupil graduate.

Dimitri had no illusions that Andrei's formal education would continue after that. His son hated school and Dimitri knew that Andrei was only doing it because it had been the condition for being allowed to move from Vadsel to Ascot to train Tempus.

"Have lunch with me then," Dimitri suggested.

"Sorry. I promised Tempus, but I will be here for dinner for sure."

Dimitri didn't doubt it. He would probably bring along an appetite that would impress his cook, as usual. Where Andrei put all the food that he devoured, Dimitri had no idea. Most jockeys had to constantly watch what they ate. Andrei on the other hand, ate like the horses he rode. He was only slightly bigger since he'd adopted him over two years ago, as a small, scrawny sixteen year old. In fact when she first met him Alex thought he was about twelve.

_Alex. _

_Why was it that so many thoughts still came with a memory of her? _

"See you, Dad."

"See you tonight."

Dimitri bit his lip. The truth was that he'd hadn't enjoyed Ascot with Helen. She'd missed the end of Andrei's race because she was chatting with someone Dimitri barely knew. Some Earl or Duke or whatever.

And it hurt him. Not that he'd admit it.

It wasn't just that she didn't care less about the race, but about one of his son's biggest victories. Dimitri had taken her along because he didn't want to think about Alex. And instead it made him miss her even more.

"You're blaming Helen for something that's your own damn fault," he admitted aloud. It wasn't her fault that she didn't care for the races. The fact that she missed Andrei crossing the finish line wasn't something she'd done on purpose. She liked Andrei. "You coerced her into coming and now you're upset that she liked the one aspect of it that you don't. The meaningless small talk."

It would've been the same if she'd dragged him to a cricket match and afterwards he told her what he liked most about it was the food at the concession stands. It wasn't her fault that he couldn't make heads or tails of cricket.

_But it wasn't about the race, it was about Andrei..._

"Stop it..." he chided himself.

Dimitri picked up a local paper and went to the society pages near the end. As expected there was a photo of him and Helen among them. That too had delighted her and she'd shared the news with no less than a dozen friends this morning.

He smiled when he remembered her excitement.

In turn he'd gotten a dozen calls from friends and family, asking him whether their relationship was official. Sure it was, he'd answered. Unlike certain other members of his gender, Dimitri had no problem with commitment. If that was what Helen wished for, he'd be glad to oblige.

_Is that what she wants? Have you even asked her, or are you just hoping? _

With Alex it had been different. He _knew_. And Dimitri also knew with one look into her eyes that she wanted it as much as he did.

The thought made him angry again.

"Stop comparing her with the woman who didn't even trust you enough to tell you why she left you, yanking out your heart out in the process..."

He threw down the paper and grabbed his keys.

Tomorrow he was due to fly back to Vadsel for a few days. Maybe there he'd come up with a hobby that would interest the new woman in his life.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

_Pine Valley, PA_

"Sing him a song," David told his daughter.

"No, I can't." she protested. "You sing."

David shook his head. "He likes _your_ voice."

Leah's dark brows narrowed and she looked at him with the kind of scepticism he'd seen from Anna more than once. "I don't know any songs."

"You don't need words. Just anything." He pointed towards the cage where Ruben, the guinea pig had raised his head, as if interested in the conversation. "See, he's waiting for you."

Leah's lips widened into a smile. "I love Ruben."

David gave her a nudge into her room. "Go show him how much. Tell him that Melissa is coming soon."

David observed her with a smile as she tried to string a few notes together.

Content that she'd be staying out of trouble for the next five minutes, he moved to his study, next to her room.

Sitting down at his desk, David Hayward turned on his desk top and read his electronic correspondence with interest.

Rosenberg had sent Alex five e-mails so far, all of which he'd forwarded to Hayward. They were lengthy, pertaining to the article she wrote, while at the same time discussing other stem cell research theories. Much of it might as well have been in Greek. It didn't mean much to David.

He forwarded one of the e-mails to his head of IT at Seaview; an anti-social genius who wasn't embarrassed about living and breathing computer technology. David figured the man could probably hack into his online bank account if he asked him to. Instead, he asked him whether he could determine the location of the sender of the e-mails Rosenberg was receiving.

David had no idea whether the request was simple or impossible.

-vancouver, canada.

That was the response he got less than an hour later.

David swallowed, impressed. _What the hell are you doing in Vancouver, Alex? _

He wrote back to him.

-Are you able to get an exact address?

-you're in luck. it's a provider based e-mail. i can narrow down the ISP in a coupla hours.

David figured that was a yes. He marvelled that a chance discovery by Robin had been able to accomplish in just over a week what Anna and Sean had failed to do in two years. _Find Alex._

"You don't know for sure that it's her yet," he reminded himself aloud. It could all be a massive coincidence. Another stem cell researcher whose name just so happened to resemble Alex's.

He looked at Rosenberg's latest e-mail.

-I set up correspondence with Alexia Merrick. What else do you want me to do?

David frowned. "I may have set you up with one of the most brilliant minds in your field and all I get in return is thinly veiled irritation. Granted, I did it through blackmail...but still."

-Keep writing to her. Share more of your ideas with her, he responded.

Levy Rosenberg must also have been sitting at his desk because his response was immediate.

-That's what I've been doing!

-And?

-She gave me some interesting ones of her own. Maybe interesting isn't the right word. Radical, farfetched? Some of her theories are way out there!

David held back from typing what he was thinking. _Outside the box. Revolutionary. Maybe those are the words you're looking for. It sounds exactly like the Alex Marick I know. It's why you'll never be in her league. Major breakthroughs aren't meant for the timid and narrow-minded. _

David decided to cut to the chase.

-In a couple of weeks I want you to have established enough of a professional rapport that it won't sound strange to suggest a local medical conference to meet up with her, to discuss some research ideas in person.

-Is she here in San Francisco?

-No, I think she's in Vancouver.

The e-mail response came with lightning speed.

-Vancouver? I don't have time to fly to Vancouver to meet up with this woman! Do you have any idea what my schedule is like?

David wanted to roll his eyes.

-You won't be meeting with her._ I_ will

There was a marked pause at the other end before his reply came through.

-Fine. I'll work on it.

-Thanks

There were no more replies after that.

David sighed. If his head of IT _could_ get him an address, why not take the next flight to Vancouver and show up on her doorstep? Why bother with the charade and force Levy to play along against his will?

'Because you don't want to spook her even more than you're already going to,' he thought, answering his own question. 'And because you still don't know whether it really_ is_ Alex...'

He saw a new e-mail in his inbox and was about to open it when suddenly he felt something crawling up his back.

He nearly jumped out of his chair and hit the ceiling.

Anna laughed.

David's heart pounded. "Jesus Christ...you nearly gave me a heart attack." He took a deep breath. "How the hell do you do that? How do sneak up on me without making a single sound?"

"Skills? WSB training?" She shrugged her shoulders. "Or maybe you're just deaf. Did you know our daughter is singing to her guinea pig?"

David pulled her onto his lap. She'd come straight home from one of her karate classes. Dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, Anna's hair was pulled back into a messy bun and she barely wore any make-up. She'd never looked more beautiful to him.

He wanted to kiss the nape of her neck, but she beat him to it, when she leaned in to kiss him on the lips. There was a hint of perspiration on her skin, mixed with the scent of her perfume. It was a subtle fragrance that he caught only when her skin was close enough to touch his. He loved that it wasn't obvious, but an intimate scent for him alone.

He kissed her back, deeply, enjoying the warm feel of her lips on his.

"How was class?" he asked afterwards.

"Good," she told him. "Our dojo officially got the okay for training the kids from the Better than Gangs programme. It's going to be a challenge. But I'm looking forward to it."

"The what?" She had his full attention now.

"It's a city programme. Free karate classes for low-income kids that have been in gang related trouble. We teach them that you don't have to be a bully to get respect. That there's lots of other ways to be tough."

David raised his brows. "You're going to teach karate to gang members? Baby, are you crazy? Do you know what sort of stuff these kids carry on them these days? Guns and knives! You have no idea what kind of gang related injuries I've seen at the Seaview ER!"

Anna groaned. "Actually, I might have some idea...you forget I used to work for the PVPD."

David frowned, hating the whole idea instantly. Imagining some punk striking back with a knife after Anna had the audacity to toss his butt on a mat. "I don't like this. Can't you get someone else to teach those kids, so you can stick to the five-year olds?"

Anan pulled away from him and David could sense her annoyance before she voiced it. "Actually sensei asked me to spearhead the programme and I agreed."

"For god's sake, Anna! You realize that you of all people can't risk a head injury again. You shouldn't even be doing this kind of physical stuff. Never mind increasing your chances of getting into fights with gang members."

"They're not exactly gang members...they're kids who might end up in one if we don't get to them first! Secondly..." she paused, her dark eyes meeting his angrily now. "How about a little faith in my abilities? Not that it will happen, but _if _I were to get into a fight with some fourteen year-old, it wouldn't be _me_ you'd have to worry about."

"Karate chops can't stop bullets, Anna," he shot back. This was going to be a fight now, but David didn't care. If that's what it took.

Anna bit her lip. "I'm not having this argument. _Again_. I've already quit my full-time job. I'm certainly not about to quit this because you have all sorts of misconceived ideas about it."

"I don't want to see you hurt, that's all..." he tried to reason.

"No, you're wrong." She wouldn't let him finish. "That's not it at all. After all this time, you still think you can turn me into something I'm not. And you're doing it while you're treating me like a child. It has to stop or else..."

This time she was the one who stopped in mid-sentence, staring at the computer. "What's that...David, did you get an e-mail from Robin? Finally a sign of life from her! Let me see!"

David turned his attention back to the screen in front of him, realizing now that the e-mail he was about to open before Anna snuck up on him _was _from Robin. Just above all the others from Levy Rosenberg.

It was the first correspondence from her in almost a week. Although she didn't like to admit it, Anna had started to worry. So much so that she'd been on the verge of contacting the US embassy in Rwanda.

The realization that Robin had sent_ him_ an e-mail made his thoughts race.

_What if she mentions the article and Alex? _

His mouth suddenly went dry. He didn't open the e-mail.

"I'm sure she sent you one too, or...copied you."

Anna didn't understand his hesitation. "Maybe...but I didn't get a chance to check. Can you open yours? I'm dying to know if she's alright."

David took a deep breath, hating that he was thinking of ways not to. Right down to tossing his wireless mouse out the window. Followed by the keyboard.

_If this e-mail was meant for me and she mentions Alex, Anna will never understand me not telling her sooner. _

Their relationship very nearly hadn't survived his constant lies at the beginning of it. She'd left him and took off for Paris while pregnant with Leah,_ because_ of his lies. He'd sworn to himself that he'd never go back to the kind of dishonesty that used to break her heart on a weekly basis.

It was the one thing he knew Anna wouldn't forgive.

"David, what is wrong with you? For god's sake can you open it? I just want to know if my daughter's okay!"

"Yeah, sure..." he tried to sound nonchalant, unable to look her in the eye. Knowing that his delayed reaction was already all she needed to arouse her suspicions.

He clicked on the e-mail, opening it. It was short. Barely five lines.

_Hi David, _

_Sent Mom a longer e-mail (in case you get this before she does) but I also need to ask whether you've found out anything more from the article I gave you. It's hard getting access to the Net where I've been, but please, please keep me updated! I'm dying to know what you found out. _

_XOXO_

_Robin_

David exhaled an audible sigh of relief. Thank god she didn't mention Alex by name.

"See..." he managed. "There's a detailed report on how she's doing in_ your_ inbox."

Anna looked at him as if trying to figure out what had just transpired. "What is she talking about? What's so important about an article?"

"There...there's been a breakthrough in AIDS research." He pointed to the other e-mails in his inbox. "Robin asked me to contact a colleague to see if I can get an inside scoop for her."

Anna looked suspicious. "What kind of breakthrough?"

"A possible vaccine." The lies rolled off his tongue much easier now. Too easily almost.

Anna's gaze was relentless. "Is that right?"

"Haven't you been reading the news?" David managed a smile. "The full extent of their progress hasn't been released to the public yet but they're very close. I trust you can keep a secret?"

His last words finally elicited a smirk from her. "I've kept a couple of yours haven't I?" She stood up and undid the clasp on her hair, letting it fall past her shoulders. "I'm going to check my Blackberry before Melissa gets here. I'm dying to know how Robin's doing."

"Let me know too," he told her, relieved that there was no more explaining to do. For now.

_Later _

Anna stared at her Blackberry and read the e-mail a second time.

_-Hi Mom_

_Sorry, I haven't been in touch. Internet and phone service are sporadic, but you and Leah and David are in my thoughts all the time. Please give them a big kiss from me, especially my little princess!_

_I won't lie and say the last few days haven't been hard. MSF transferred me from the Kigali clinic to a refugee camp near the DRC border, close to the Kivu region where the armed conflict is happening. Most of the refugees in the camp are fleeing that civil war. Conditions here are rough and the heat is bad. Supplies are constantly running out or getting stolen, it's so damn frustrating. Thought I'd seen everything after a year at the Pine Valley ER, but that didn't even come close. There isn't much time for sleep or much of anything besides the work we're doing. It's not what I thought I'd be doing here. I was prepared for AIDS related cases, not war injuries, but... this is where I'm needed right now and I'm grateful to have the skills for it. _

_I love you Mom. _

_Robin_

_ps: Tell me how the wedding plans are coming along! _

Anna bit her lip, hating that the news from Robin had worried her more than the lack of news did earlier. Her HIV positive daughter was working in a refugee camp near a war zone.

_Why do you have to go to an African war zone of all places to make a difference, sweetheart? Do you have any idea how hard it is to know you're there, and that if anything happens to you I'm too far away to help you? It's so damn hard, and every time I give myself two minutes to think about it I want to hop on the next plane to Africa, and bring you to your senses. _

Anna leaned against the kitchen counter and drank the ice-cold water she'd poured into a glass. Exhaling after she set it back down on the counter.

_Is this how David feels when he sees me teaching gangster-wannabes karate? _

"It's not the same," she whispered aloud. "Not even close."

She was angry. Enough so that she wanted to kick the counter she was leaning against.

Not just because David still didn't believe that she was capable of taking care of herself.

_If that's your reaction to my teaching troubled kids karate, I can't wait to see how you react when I tell you I plan on going back to the PVPD in the Fall..._

But more so because she knew he was lying about something.

_You used to be such a good liar. Not anymore. Or maybe I just know you too well now. _

While she might not like it, Anna could tolerate his bull-headed over protectiveness because she knew it was rooted in love. Sometimes it even reminded her of Robert.

But Anna swore she wouldn't tolerate any more lies. Not when it was one lie after another that nearly killed their relationship before it even had a chance. And not when she thought that it was something to do with her daughter.

_What if Robin is asking you to look into research developments because her medication has stopped working? Would you keep that from me if she asked you to?_

Beside the anger, there was hurt too. Anna couldn't understand why now, when they'd weathered so much to get to where they were, David would go back to keeping secrets.

Part of her wanted to go back upstairs to his study and confront him, right now. But now wasn't the time. Melissa would be here any moment, and Anna knew that the teen girl she'd grown so fond of loved spending time with them because it gave her a chance to escape the drama of her own family. Leah loved having her over. The two of them would spend most of the afternoon playing with Ruben, the guinea pig that Melissa had to give up and was now part of their family.

The doorbell rang and Anna exhaled again.

Whatever David was hiding, she'd find out, Anna decided. Even if she had to play by his rules for a change.

Anna pushed a strand of hair behind her ears, as Leah came running into the room, to answer the door with her.

"Is it Melissa?" she asked.

Anna hoisted her daughter into her arms. "I think so. Let's find out."

Anna opened the door to find Melissa and her mother on the other side.

"Hi, Anna."

She smiled when she saw the teenage girl. "Hi sweetie." Leah slipped out of her arms and pulled Melissa into the house before Anna had the chance to say anything else.

Melissa's mother gave her look of mild disdain before holding out her hand. "I never get a chance to say hello to your little girl before she storms off, Mrs. Hayward."

'I wish I was three again and could do the same,' Anna thought fighting the urge to correct her. Instead, she shrugged her shoulders. "What can I say? She's happy to see Melissa." Anna gestured into the hallway. "Why don't you come in?"

"I can't have her stay long tonight," Patsy Cartwright pointed out ignoring the invitation. "The Senator and I have an early appointment tomorrow, so we can't pick her up too late."

It always made Anna smirk when Mrs. Cartwright referred to her husband as 'the Senator_'_. _Maybe I'll refer to David as the Surgeon from now on. _

The surgeon snuck up behind her, and Anna suddenly felt his hand on her lower back.

"Why don't you let her stay the night?" David suggested to Melissa's mother, with a smile that was full of easy charm.

It amused Anna to see Patsy Cartwright respond to it, blushing slightly.

"Oh...I don't want to impose. No, I couldn't..."

"You're not imposing. We're angling for a free babysitter."

Anna smiled. David had a way of doing that. Of putting anyone at ease. Her husband was a hard man to resist.

David's hand still rested on the small of her back, but he'd pulled her closer to him. There was never any doubt of how much he loved her. How much he wanted her. It was frustratingly easy to love him.

Patsy Cartwright managed a thin-lipped smile. "Surely you have plans too? I wouldn't want Melissa to interrupt them."

David shook his head. "Not a one. Does she have enough meds on her?"

"Yes...yes, she does, always. But she didn't come prepared to spend the night. She doesn't have any..."

"She can borrow one of Robin's pyjamas and sleep in her room. We have extra toiletries," Anna added. "It really is no trouble."

"Well...alright then."

"Are you sure you don't want to join us for dinner?" David added, knowing she'd decline.

"No, I can't. The Senator and I have dinner reservations at Millicent tonight."

"Well...can't say my cooking compares to Millicent's," Anna admitted.

"Or even Melissa's..." David added.

Anna shot him a look. "Thanks."

Patsy Cartwright eyed them both and offered another meagre smile. "I'll be off then, please tell Melissa I said good-bye and that I'll come pick her up tomorrow afternoon."

Anna closed the door, shaking her head in disbelief. "Because it would kill her to say bye to her daughter herself..." It never ceased to amaze her how Patsy Cartwright always somehow made Melissa seem like an afterthought. And that the gentle daughter who didn't have a single selfish bone in her body, never thought to call her mother on it. David told her that Patsy Cartwright had refused to let Melissa keep the guinea pig she loved so much, following her extensive heart surgery, making Anna think she was every bit as heartless as she suspected.

David's arm was around her now. "Funny how no one thought to ask Melissa whether she wanted to stay."

"You know she'd let us adopt her if we could," Anna sighed, leaning against him. It was hard to stay angry with him too. "Should we tell her the good news?"

"Go for it. But first tell me how Robin's doing."

Anna shrugged her shoulders, not wanting to think about her daughter near an African refugee camp. "She says she's alright, but I still don't think this is a good idea given her condition..."

"Anna, the virus is nearly undetectable in her system now. Don't forget that. She has no symptoms. She's _healthy_."

"It's _nearly _undetectable. Kept in control only by medication."

"Don't look at it that way, baby."

Anna bit her lip. "Right."

Anna paused, turning to meet his eyes.

_I'm going to ask you one more time. Because I want to believe we're past lying to each other. _

"What is it that Robin wants you to look up?"

The question took him by surprise. "What?"

"The research you said she wants you to look into, what exactly is it?"

Anna could sense his defensiveness already by the way he tightened his lips. "It's nothing, really..."

"It sounded important to Robin."

He raised his hands, not meeting her eyes this time. "Look, do you really want me to bore you with medical jargon right after our young guest got here?"

"Just tell me the basics, in layman's terms."

"It's...it's about a possible AIDS vaccine, like I said. Very experimental at this point. I can't really go into details."

_Fine then. Have it your way. Remember that I gave you two chances._

Anna said nothing as he put his arm back over her shoulder.

"Come. I want to make our girls my out-of-this world spaghetti bolognese. You open a bottle of red, and I'll do the rest."

Anna bit her tongue. "Alright..."

* * *

_Kigali, Rwanda_

Robin Scorpio looked at the fruit stands in front of her.

There were so many varieties in such a rainbow of colours, they nearly competed with the colourful print dresses of their vendors. The afternoon market was a noisy, crowded and chaotic affair and Robin wished she'd taken along a camera. It was a beautiful change from the misery she'd seen this past month.

One African woman held out a greenish-yellow fruit with five pointy ends to Robin, urging her to buy it.

Robin shook her head with a smile. Beautiful as they looked, none of them made her want to take a bite. The nausea that had been with her all week was still bad. She knew she had to try and eat something since they took out the saline IV last night. But it was almost late afternoon now and she still hadn't made the effort.

Robin cringed when she thought of the past few days.

She fell ill almost a week ago at the rural clinic that the Médecins sans Frontières team was running near the DRC border. At first she was certain it was something she ate, combined with the unreliable refrigeration, making it impossible to keep some of her protocol meds as cold as they needed to be.

Dehydrated, running a fever and ultimately collapsing after a twelve hour shift, the MSF team promptly stuck her on a land rover that brought her to a nearby landing strip, where a wobbly single engine plane brought her back to a hospital in Kigali, where she remained for the next three days.

"And where I found out that my viral load is detectable again..." Robin whispered aloud. The thought still frustrated her enough that it almost brought on a fresh batch of tears. No matter how much she liked to deny it, the truth was that her immune system would never be as strong as that of someone who never had the virus to start. The numbers were still low enough not to be cause for serious worry, but they had increased for the first time in years.

Even so, Robin wasn't ready to quit.

She even resisted calling her mother, instead sending her an e-mail from the hotel that suggested she was still at the camp because that's exactly where she planned to be again in the near future.

Robin knew that her mother's worried voice might just be the straw that broke the camels back. The one final push she needed to hop on a plane back to the US. God knows it felt like the obvious thing to do right now, when even after three days in bed, she barely had the energy to walk a few blocks in the African heat. Every fibre of her exhausted body wanted nothing more than to call it a day and spend a week or more at the mountain cabin in Pine Valley, loving her baby sister and being taken care of by her mother and David.

'It's a setback, that's all,' she reminded herself. It was easy to give in when you felt miserable. At least she was out of the hospital and back in a hotel. All she had to do now was get back on track with her meds, rest and regain her energy and decrease the viral load again. It was something that could feasibly be done in a week.

Robin frowned. Her head pounded and she knew after less than half an hour of venturing outside it was time to head back to her hotel room. Mentally she needed an escape from the four walls that had surrounded her the last few days, but physically she wasn't quite up to the task. Besides, one of the MSF doctors was due to check in on her early this evening.

Much as she hated the fuss, she had to admit the young Belgian who'd come to see her the past two days at the hospital was easy enough on the eyes that she didn't mind his visits _that_ much. His dark hair and easy smile reminded her a lot of David.

'A European David without the swagger,' she thought.

Her stomach lurched as she turned to head back to her hotel. It was less than a ten minute walk from the market.

She felt like she might throw up, except that she was certain she had nothing to throw up. Her nausea was now accompanied by dizziness and part of her wanted to scold herself for venturing out on her own.

Amidst the noise and chatter of the market, Robin heard a voice that made her turn her head. It was that of a woman arguing in the native tongue with a market vendor. The voice wasn't louder or more distinctive than anyone else's in the throng of people that surrounded her but there was something about it that Robin recognized.

Robin squinted her eyes in the sun as she eyed the tall, beautiful and obviously pregnant woman. Suddenly she realized that she_ did_ know her.

"Sandrine?" she called out to the woman, unsure whether it really was the African woman who worked for the WSB and had helped her mother and Sean search for Alex two years ago. Maybe her mind was playing tricks on her. Hadn't Sandrine said she lived in Kinshasa?

The woman turned around and judging from the look of utter shock on her face, Robin had no doubts that it was indeed her.

"Robin?" she asked in disbelief, dropping a piece of fruit she held in her hand. It fell with a plop onto the wooden market stall. "Is that you?"

"Yes..." Robin managed a smile. It was oddly comforting to see a familiar face halfway across the world from her home. "What are the chances?"

"_Je peux pas le croire_..." Sandrine muttered. "Robin Scorpio? Robin...what are you doing here?"

Sandrine didn't look like she shared Robin's pleasure in seeing someone familiar. In fact the shock and disbelief written all over her face seemed excessive.

Suddenly there was another voice in the crowd that sent chills up Robin's spine.

"Sandi, we have to get going or else we'll never make it to the dinner in time..."

The voice came from behind her and, though it seemed impossible, Sandrine looked pale now. Pale and shaken and upset.

Robin felt like holding her hands against her ears. She couldn't have heard the voice she thought she heard. It was one she hadn't heard in over fifteen years and knew she wouldn't, _couldn't_, ever hear again.

The dizziness was unbearable now and Sandrine's face was swimming in front of her, drowning in a kaleidoscope of African colours.

Robin was dreaming. She was sure of it.

Even so, she turned around to see where the voice came from, and for the first time in almost two decades, she saw her father's blue eyes again, staring back at her in shock.

The realization of what the vision meant suddenly dawned on her.

She was dying.

She was going to die in the middle of a bustling African market, a world away from the family she loved.

But it was okay.

She was going to be with her father again and _that _thought sent an unexpected warmth all over body. It made her lips curl up into a smile even.

"I missed you, Dad...but I'm coming..." she whispered, low enough to make it impossible for anyone to hear her. "I think I'm going to be with you now."

It was her last thought before the world around her went dark.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five **

_Vancouver, Canada_

* * *

_It was late and dark and the rain pounded against the windows. _

_A loud knock on the door carried over the noise of the rain. _

_She ignored it, hoping it would go away. _

_Instead, whoever was outside knocked again. Louder this time, banging against the door._

_She got up to answer it, an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach._

_"Mummy...here!" Liam's voice called to her from hallway. "Mummy, stay here!"_

_She opened the door and gasped when she saw his face. _

_"You didn't think you could run from me forever, did you? Did you really think you were communicating with a stem cell researcher?" The creases on his pockmarked skin deepened when he spotted Liam standing behind her. "You know what happens when you play with fire too often, Alexandra. You get burned. First you play me for a fool then you steal what's mine. This time you went too far."_

_Alex slammed the door, but he was too fast. He was already inside. _

_Cesar Faison was standing in her hallway._

_Her heart pounded, her limbs immobile. _

_"Maria, take Liam! Take him and run!" _

_She saw the gun in his hand. The hatred in his eyes when he raised it towards her. _

_"You can't protect him if you're dead, Alexandra."_

_She threw herself at him, but it was too late. He already pulled the trigger. _

_"No..." _

_It couldn't end like this. Not like this. She couldn't die having failed her son. _

_She couldn't die before she had a chance to see Dimitri and Andrei one last time. _

"Alejandra?"

Alex jumped back in shock at the old woman's touch.

She realized that she was in the living room, half-sitting on her couch. Her heart was racing and she felt uncomfortably hot. Like she was suffocating.

"You had a dream, that's all," Maria assured her.

Alex must not have looked convinced because Maria repeated herself.

"You fell asleep here, after you come back from the park with Liam. He fell asleep upstairs and you here, on the sofa. Then you had a dream. It's okay." Her face was calm and reassuring.

Alex bit her lip guiltily. Maria was calm because she'd been through this before. More than once. "I'm sorry..."

"Why? Is not your fault." The old woman sat down next to her and ran a hand along the back of Alex's hair, before gently moving a strand away from her face. "If one day you don't wake up, then I promise I will be mad at you."

Alex took a deep breath, trying to keep from hyperventilating.

_It's okay. You did a background check on Levy Rosenberg. You even called his supposed office in California from a pay phone to verify his existence. And there's no way Faison could correspond with you about this kind of research with that kind of knowledge. No way._

"Can I bring you something to drink?"

Alex nodded, noticing only now that her cheeks were wet too. "Please..."

She cupped her forehead in her hands. She felt drained, as always, after a nightmare.

_Who are you kidding to think you can return to the land of living, like a normal person. Normal people don't take a nap and wake up screaming. Why would you even think to put the man you love through this again? Let him love someone who's not nuts. _

The thought gave her a morbid smile.

_What kind of physician uses the term nuts? _

"It's okay," Maria answered, handing her a glass of water.

Alex didn't think she'd spoken the last words aloud. But she must have.

"I have seen crazier people than you. _Mucho mas loco_."

Alex gave her a lopsided smile. "Thanks."

_Batuyan Islands, Philippines_

* * *

Cesar Faison took a drag of his cigarillo as the ocean waves lapped at his feet.

He was seated on a lounge chair on the beach that ran along the front of his island home.

It wasn't just his beach. It was his island.

The tropics weren't really his cup of tea. Never had been. Too warm, bright and sunny.

But he was getting used to it. He had come to a point in his life where the cold and damp weather of northern Europe was starting to bother his joints.

'I'm getting old,' he thought wryly, hating the thought.

Besides, most of his business ventures were in the East now, along with the economic future of the planet. It made sense for him to be here. At the heart of it all, yet at the same time away from it all.

Behind the colonial beach house was a landing strip where a gulfstream jet could take him to Taipei or Hong Kong in just over an hour.

Faison wore a dark, short-sleeved shirt and linen pants, one foot resting on the pristine, white sand below, the other one on his chair. It was as casual as he allowed himself to be.

There were half a dozen newspapers on the rattan table next to the chair. Much as Faison profited from modern technology, when it came to personal knowledge, he preferred digesting it in the form of the printed word rather than the pixel.

Faison put out his cigar, discarded his copy of the _Frankfurter Allgemeine_ and picked up _The Times _just as Jan came running out of his house.

"Sir, you left your cellular phone inside the house, Mr. Cheng is on the other line. He says it is urgent he speak with you..."

Faison raised a brow. Annoyed.

"Didn't I say I wish to not be disturbed? I haven't had a chance to go through my papers yet."

"He...he says it's urgent."

Faison sighed and looked at his assistant, wondering if there was ever a moment when Jan didn't look tense, frazzled and slightly ill at ease. If there was he hadn't seen it yet. Normally he wouldn't tolerate this kind of questioning. But this was Jan after all. His patience and appreciation for him was growing with time.

"Tell him I'm not available," he said softly.

Jan nodded. He wore a three-piece suit and there were several beads of sweat running along his hairline. "Yes, sir."

Faison listened as Jan informed Cheng that his boss had taken the boat out to go fishing.

Faison cringed after his assistant ended the call. "Fishing?"

Jan blushed. "Sorry. It was the first thing that came to mind."

Faison open _The Times_, starting at the end, as he liked to do, preferring to save the main course once he was deeper into the publication. He was surprised at the first picture that caught his eye. "Take a look at this," he told Jan. "Look familiar?"

Jan squinted his eyes and adjusted his wire-rimmed glasses. "Dimitri Marick?"

"He's at Ascot, with a woman." He stared at the photo, examining her. She was tall, pretty and blonde. She fit in well with the beautiful society crowd that surrounded her. "She suits her surroundings better than Alexandra. But I think Alexandra was a better fit for Dimitri than this..." He searched for the name. "This Helen Reed." Faison smiled. "I feel as though the Hungarian Count is better suited to having someone as dark, brooding and tortured as himself in his castle. This woman looks entirely too.._.happy_." He uttered the last word with disdain.

Jan said nothing. Faison knew he was humouring him.

"We still have a credit card trail on Marick, don't we?" Faison asked.

"Yes, sir."

"Anything unusual?"

Jan shook his head. "Nothing. He keeps his time between London and his estate in Hungary. He buys an occasional thoroughbred along with an expensive suit. That's all."

"I'm curious to know what happened to Alexandra, Jan," he admitted. "She disappeared from the face of the Earth after escaping from Alexei Estate. If I didn't know that Scorpio was now in Rwanda, I'd say she walked off into the sunset with him. I'm disappointed that we don't know what's happened to her."

"I think...it's best we don't bother with her anymore."

Faison smiled. Jan rarely voiced an opinion but there was no doubting how much he wanted his boss to stay away from the Scorpios. Faison knew that his love of Anna stressed his assistant like nothing else in this world.

"Don't worry," he assuaged him. "I could care less about Alexandra Marick. I want to know only to satisfy my curiosity." He took another look at the photograph of her husband. "But I won't lie to you and say that Anna Devane isn't in my thoughts every single day."

Jan swallowed, a notch paler after that confession.

Faison chuckled. "It's mad, isn't it?" He pointed at the photograph. "Dimitri Marick only needed two years to get over Alexandra and I still can't let go of Anna after more than two decades."

_Vancouver, Canada_

* * *

"I see you've worked in a clinic before?" the old Arab doctor asked her a second time, glancing at her doctored resume. His thick, dark hair was peppered with white and his demeanour surprisingly relaxed, given the loud, jam-packed waiting room. "You're also a certified nursing aide?"

"Yes," Alex nodded.

"This is a small, busy place and we're open 24 hours. I run it at night, so you will be working with me. It's rare that I'm here during the day," he explained in flawless English as he ushered her into his office. "There will be times when you'll need to do more than just register the patients. You'll need to help stock the cabinets, clean the exam rooms and help the RN on duty with basic procedures. Stitching up the UDs mostly..."

"The what?"

"Undesirables," he explained, mildly apologetic. "The homeless. Not very PC, I know...but you noticed what neighbourhood we're in."

'The infamous East Side,' Alex thought. The only place where she'd seen a decently paying job that she might be able to wing with her new resume.

She was still just beginning to get to know her new home town, but already she was well aware of the East Side. It was hard to pick up a daily paper without finding an article about it. It was Vancouver's most notorious neighbourhood. Known mostly for its embarrassingly visible drug problem. And partly for the ensuing sex trade and poverty it spawned. The constant rain made the area's worn down, warehouse-style buildings look even more glum than they already were.

"Look, I'm going to be blunt with you," he added, not unkindly. "The majority of our patients are victims of violence or drug abuse or life on the street. It's not pretty."

Even so the doctor had a smile that was disarming and Alex liked that despite its location, the clinic was clean, bright and full of little human touches. A vase with fresh flowers sat on a window sill. A bowl of apples on the counter. A wall full of children's drawings.

It was a bleak place in a bleak neighbourhood, but it was run by someone who gave a damn in spite of it. An idealist.

Alex mustered a smile. There were too many cynics in the world. It was nice to think the old Arab wasn't one of them. "Alright, I'll be blunt with you too then. I'm English. I'm new here and I need Canadian experience. I daresay I'm overqualified for this job, but I _need_ it, and I'd like you to give me a chance."

This time Dr. Ahmad Hussain laughed. "Ah...an immigrant. We have to work twice as hard, eh? To be considered half as good. But as a woman you're used to that, no?" He paused. "It's not always fair...but when I see I'm giving my children a chance to grow up in a country without war, where everybody has the same rights and the same chances to succeed. Then I think it's worth it. Many, many times over. Do you have children?"

"Yes." Alex paused. "I have... two sons."

"Then you know that we do everything for them, Mrs. Merrick, I will check your references today. You'll need to take a drug test as well. If everything is fine you can start yesterday."

"A drug test?"

The old doctor frowned. "Our last receptionist had an opiate addiction that we didn't clue in on until several dozen bottles of Vicodin went missing. It's standard now."

Alex nodded. "I see."

"Are you taking any medication?"

Alex shook her head, happy to give him her second honest answer of the day. "No." The drug test wouldn't be a problem. The references on the other hand...

_Pine Valley, PA_

* * *

"You're not joining us?" David asked her, surprised, as he buttoned up a short sleeved shirt. "Breakfast at IHOP with the girls? Since when do you willingly miss out on that?" He pressed a hand against her forehead. "Are you sick?"

Anna winced. "No...just..."

David frowned, serious now. "Headache?"

Anna nodded.

"Migraine?"

"It's getting there..."

His frown deepened. "It's been a while..."

"I think I'm overdue."

He moved to close the blinds for her. "Stay here and rest then. I'll take Leah and Mel somewhere else after breakfast."

Anna bit her lip. It wasn't what she had in mind. In fact, she was looking forward to spending time with both of them after she was done with her task. "You don't have to do that..."

"It's better for you if the cabin is quiet," he insisted. "And Patsy's not coming to get Mel until later today anyway."

Anna sighed. "You don't need to..."

He'd already left the room and came back with a jug of water that he put down on the bedside stand, along with a small container of prescription tablets. "In case you need them," he explained. He also placed her Blackberry next to it. "Call me, if you need me."

Anna had to hold back a chuckle. "Yes, doc."

He bent down to give her a kiss. "I love you."

"I love you too," she whispered, reaching up to kiss him back.

"Feel better, okay?"

She sunk back into her pillow. "Thanks. Tell the girls I'm sorry."

Anna stared at the ceiling, listening to the noise outside, cringing guiltily when she heard David tell Leah, that, no she couldn't go upstairs to say bye to Mommy, just in case she was already sleeping. She propped herself up on her elbow, staring at a photo of the four of them, Leah, David, Robin and Anna, next to the pitcher of water David had brought her.

It had been taken by an exasperated professional photographer, because David had insisted he wanted a portrait of their family before Robin took off for Africa, and, preferably before Leah started high school. Leah had been unable to sit still that afternoon, and nearly every picture the photographer had taken that day was of Leah's face as a blur.

That is until Leah spotted a piano in the room next door and plopped herself down on its chair, entranced by the ebony and ivory keys, pressing down on each one of them with great care and deliberation.

The photographer made them move over to the piano and one of Anna's favourite photographs was one with Leah's face etched in concentration as she played the piano for the first time. They bought one shortly after, not only because Leah loved it but because it gave David a chance to play again too.

David often neglected his musical talents. It was a shame, because he played very well. On the rare occasion he sat down to play an entire sonata, it reminded her of a day over three years ago, when he'd been playing a hotel piano and Anna was about to kick him out for trespassing. She'd been pregnant with Leah then and he'd convinced her to sit down next to him so he could play her a song.

It was a beautiful piece. Mozart he'd explained. Anna didn't know much about music, but she knew that every time David insisted on playing something just for her, it made her fall in love with him a little more. He played the piano the same way that he operated on his patients, and the same way he loved her and Leah. He did it with all his heart.

She stared at the water and the pills on the night table stand, feeling bad for her ruse. He always worried when she had a migraine. Maybe it was his ability as a physician to envision some horrible neurological consequences that would never occur to Anna.

For that reason, unless it was bad enough to make it obvious, Anna generally didn't tell him when she_ did_ get one. She knew that following her head injuries on the tanker explosion all those years ago, she'd never be entirely rid of them, but for now she was grateful they didn't plague her with the same frequency that they used to. David was right about one thing. Stress made them worse, and, much as she hated to admit it, she had to make a conscious effort to avoid it.

Anna waited another fifteen minutes before getting up. Just in case he forgot something.

Then she made her way into his study and sat down across from his desk top computer.

_So you lie to him, in order to find out whether he's lying. Hypocrite. _

His e-mail was password protected but it didn't take Anna long to figure it out.

"Jesus Christ, David. My name and Leah's birthday? _Really?_ For such a celebrated ex-schemer you do a lousy job of covering your tracks. I should have taught you better than that." She smiled. "Or maybe not."

Her eyes scanned the screen. The first few were obviously from Seaview Hospital and she didn't bother opening them. A couple looked like spam and she ignored those as well. There were a few from names she didn't recognize, including a Levy Rosenberg.

She opened the first unread e-mail that caught her eye.

-I mentioned to her that I'll be at the Seattle conference. But I won't mention the idea of meeting up for another couple of e-mails, 'cause you said you didn't want to spook her. I have to confess, I'm starting to consider meeting up with her myself. I sent her part of my latest project and she pointed out something that I hadn't noticed! Something that could even change the test results! Can you believe it?

Anna frowned. There was no salutation, no signature, no mention of who 'she' was. Obviously the recipient was implicitly familiar with both the sender and the topic.

"Bizarre..."

Anna closed the e-mail and marked it as unread.

She scrolled down and went through a few more that were obviously work related.

Then she saw another, older one also from Levy Rosenberg that made her eyes widen.

-I set up correspondence with Alexia Merrick. What else do you want me to do?

_Alexia Merrick?_

"What the...?"

Anna hastily read the other e-mails from Rosenberg but there was no mention of the name again. From what Anna deducted David was trying to set up a meeting with this Alexia, using Rosenberg as an intermediary. There was another e-mail to someone else asking to locate her and the response was Vancouver.

Anna's breathing quickened. "You're trying to meet up with a woman in Canada. A researcher, whose name is almost identical to my sister's..."

None of it made sense. Was it even possible?

_Did you find Alex? _

Anna couldn't wrap her mind around the possibility that David might have tracked down her sister without mentioning it to her.

_I spend every free moment for two years trying to find her. You know that. You know I'd give anything just to know that she's okay... you couldn't possibly have found a lead and not told me. The man I know and love wouldn't do that to me..._

Anna felt a teardrop rolling down her face.

_Alex...are you really alive, sis? _

It took every ounce of willpower for her not to pick up the phone and call David right now, demanding an explanation.

"Don't," she stopped herself. "Not when he's with the girls..."

Instead, Anna read the e-mails in disbelief for a second time. Needing to make sure she hadn't imagined what she just saw.

_King Faisal Hospital, Kigali, Rwanda_

* * *

Sandrine watched him as he paced, a cup of coffee in her hand.

Robert Saunders was a man who had once negotiated for her life with rebel guerrillas about to cut off her head. He'd done it with courage, icy-cool determination and nerves of steel while Sandrine had been reduced to a mess of uncontrollable tears as her life flashed before her eyes. But now her hero was the one who was a nervous wreck. One who couldn't stop circling the row of chairs in the waiting room.

Robert ran a hand through his increasingly gray hair. "What the hell is Robin doing in Kigali?"

Sandrine handed him the coffee. She'd chosen decaf for both of them this time.

"When I was with her in Paris, I remember her saying something about wanting to go to Africa, to work with AIDS victims."

"The doctor...the doctor said _she's_ HIV positive, Sandi. But I know that's not possible. He must've made a mistake. I told him to redo the blood test."

Sandrine sighed. "Robert...please sit down for a minute."

"I can't...I can't sit. I'll go stir crazy." He glanced towards the closed door of the patient room where his daughter was lying unconscious.

"Robert, please! There's something I need to tell you." Sandrine grabbed his arm. "I can't do that when you are walking like a lion in a cage!"

Robert's blue eyes met hers, looking as helpless as she'd ever seen them. "Sandi...what am I supposed to tell her when she wakes up?"

Sandrine took his hand in hers. "Let _me_ see her first. She recognized me, remembered me, let me talk to her first to lessen her shock."

Robert finally sat down. "I don't know if it's possible for anything to lessen her shock. Unless you tell her what she saw...it wasn't real. Maybe she still doesn't have to know..."

"Oh no! You are_ not_ leaving her this time!" Sandrine glared at him. "I don't care how much you think her life is better without you. You are going to stay here. You are going to tell her the truth. About you, and about us..." She put a hand on her pregnant belly. "About the baby brother she is going to have soon."

"Sandi, I can't..." the words nearly got caught in his throat, making them sound like a croak.

"We will find a way to tell her."

"She'll never forgive me. My daughter is going to hate me. And she has every right to hate..."

Sandrine tightened her grip on his hand. "Robin is going to find out her father is alive. Hating you is _not_ going to be the first thing on her mind!"

Robert couldn't stay seated, in spite of her grip. "Where is that doctor with the blood tests? I thought when you pay to stay in a private part of the hospital you actually got treated with some sort of efficiency..."

"Robert, please sit down there is something else I need to tell you, about Robin and the HIV."

He looked at her puzzled. "You have something to tell me?"

"When I went to search for you in Paris, two years ago. I met Robin and Anna..."

"Yes, I know! You worked with Anna and Sean."

"One day I had to go to Anna's apartment because she left a disc there and Robin was home." Sandrine paused. There really was no way to put this gently. "There were a lot of medication containers on one counter...I assumed they belonged to Anna. She didn't look good then. She had headaches all the time. I was sure she was sick, maybe more so than she was telling anyone. I asked Robin about them...but she corrected me. She said they belonged to her, not Anna. That it was a cocktail to prevent her HIV from becoming AIDS."

"What?" Robert's face was pale. "What are you saying?"

"Robin _is_ HIV positive. She has been for a long time."

He finally stopped pacing, his face completely devoid of colour now. "Sandi...how is that...?" He sat down, sapped of energy, as if something had struck him.

"It's not AIDS, Robert. HIV is something you can live with," she tried.

"I know what HIV is, Sandi!"

"Robin, she is healthy. She is going to be okay."

He raised his head to look at her. "My daughter's lying in a hospital bed, unconscious. How do you know if she's going to be okay?" He cupped his face in his hands, mumbling now. "Damn it...how is this possible. Robin is here doing god knows what in Africa...and she's HIV positive? I don't understand. Where the hell is Anna in all this?"

Sandrine sat down next him, hating what he was going through. "Try to be patient. I know this is hard, but when she wakes up, she is the best person to answer your questions."

Robert looked at her incredulously. "Answer _my_ questions? I can't even begin to fathom _her_ questions when she realizes that I've lied to her for all this time." His eyes watered. "Why didn't you tell me about the HIV?"

Sandrine took his hand into hers. "I would have if you had not decided to go to Paris two years ago, after Alex's kidnapping. You were supposed to tell her that you were alive. I thought after that she would have a chance to tell you herself. That's the way it was supposed to be."

Robert sighed. "But I came back from Paris, without having seen her...because I was too much of a coward. Because I couldn't face..."

"Stop it," Sandrine cut him off. "You are a lot of things, Robert. A coward is not one of them. Every single choice you made was because you believed that it was the best choice you could make for Robin."

"I should have had the guts to face her two years ago, like you told me to," Robert insisted. "No matter what the consequences. Even now I'm terrified of telling her the truth."

Sandrine shrugged. "Two years ago you did what you thought was best for Robin and her family. Maybe it_ was_ the best thing for her. Or maybe not. It's possible you made the wrong decision and maybe _that's_ why you are given another chance now."

"I just don't know what's right anymore. What if every decision I made was the wrong one? Maybe she wouldn't have become infected with this disease if I had been around." Robert stared at the door that marked Robin's room. Shell-shocked. "My little girl has HIV. How..._how _is that possible?"

Sandrine put an arm around his shoulder and kissed his cheek. "I don't know...but when she wakes up, you and me, we're going to make sure that she will be okay."

* * *

Authors note: Sorry this one took forever to get out! Big thanks to my two awesome editors, Kel and Annie. And thanks to the readers for your patience. :)


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_King Faisal Hospital, Kigali, Rwanda_

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_

* * *

_

Robin's vision came into focus slowly as the dark, blurry figure in front of her became the familiar face of Sandrine Mutanga.

She felt as though she was waking up from a three-day nap. Refreshed. But groggy and vaguely uncomfortable.

Sandrine's face broke into a beautiful smile. "Hi, Robin. Welcome back."

"Thanks..." Robin muttered, testing her voice. It sounded sleepy but fine to her. "So, I wasn't dreaming. I did see you at the market."

"You did. The world is very small sometimes, isn't it?"

Robin gave her a lop-sided smile. "Seriously."

"I'm glad you saw me when you did," Sandrine said softly.

"What happened..." Robin paused, embarrassed now. "Did I faint?"

"You did. Then your...my...my husband and I, we brought you to this hospital. We talked to your doctor. He says he is worried about your virus levels. That you need to take some time to lower them. Maybe change your medication. But..." Sandrine gave her another smile. "Compared to a lot of the patients he sees with HIV he says you are doing very, very well."

Robin eyed Sandrine's belly. "You weren't married when I saw you in Paris. And..." She smiled. "You're expecting too."

Sandrine nodded. "My life has changed a lot."

Robin's curiosity was piqued now. "When you were in Paris you were searching for your partner. My Mom tried to get a hold of him after Alex disappeared. There are things that she wanted to ask him about how he helped her escape from Faison. But she couldn't, something about him working under deep cover. I think she tried to contact you too."

"I left Kinshasa not long afterwards."

"With your partner?"

Sandrine offered her what looked like a meagre attempt at a smile. "You are asking a lot of questions. You were unconscious. You just woke up. Slow down, Robin, because I have some questions for you too."

Robin eyed her. "I'm sorry...you're right. I see you for the first time after two years and drop like a sack of potatoes in front of you. I bet you want to ask me some things too."

"Are you here alone, Robin? Is there someone we should be contacting?"

Robin suddenly thought back to the young Belgian who should have met her tonight at the hotel. _Was it even still tonight? How long had she been unconscious?_ "Yes, and no. My family's not here. But I'm here with MSF. You're right, one of my colleagues might be worried." Another thought suddenly occurred to her too. _What if her doctor friend had_ _been worried enough to call her family back in the States?_ The thought made her cringe. "Sandrine...can you help me call my colleague? To tell him that I'm okay?"

"You're not really okay, Robin."

"I mean, let him know I haven't been kidnapped or something."

"Yes...of course. But..." Sandrine paused. "We should also call your mother. Tell her that you're here."

_That is the last thing I want to do_, Robin thought. "Yeah, I will. But first I need to call Jean-Luc." _Before it occurs to him to call Mom and completely freak her out by telling her that I'm sick and missing._ "Will you look up the number for the MSF office in Kigali for me? You'll be able to get a hold of him there." Robin wished she had his personal number to expedite the process.

Sandrine nodded. "Sure, but first there's something I need to tell..."

"Can you do this first?" Robin pleaded, cutting her off. "Please, I don't want him to worry."

"Alright, I will find the number," she told her. "I will find the number and I will call him. If you promise me you will rest and take it easy while I do that?"

Robin promised her she would. _I'll feel a lot better knowing that he's not alarming my family needlessly. _

Sandrine got up slowly and gingerly, making Robin realize she must be quite far along in her pregnancy. The realization piqued her curiosity. "Sandrine...can I ask you, your baby's father? Is it your partner? The one you were looking for, who saved Alex?"

Sandrine held Robin's gaze for a long, quiet moment, before answering.

"Yes," she finally replied.

_Vancouver, Canada _

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_

* * *

_

It had been a long time since Alex worked this hard.

She'd started at eleven at night and now she spied the sun rising outside. She didn't think there was a moment, aside from this one, where she had two seconds to reflect on her new surroundings.

The steady stream of patients that had filed through the clinic since she started her shift had kept her so busy that when she picked up a plastic bottle of water to have a sip, she realized it was her first one of the night. Even so, she did it while holding a toddler in her other arm. A young, Native girl with ash black hair and huge, plump cheeks that Alex wanted to kiss. "Your Mom is going to be just fine," she whispered into her hair.

The mother was a teenager whose forms Alex had helped her fill out an hour earlier. Although the young woman wouldn't admit it, Alex suspected that she was borderline illiterate and couldn't read the questions, so she'd read them aloud to her and written the answers in herself.

The girl in her arms was quiet and there was a disturbing resignation about her as she leaned her head against Alex's shoulder. She was so different from her curious, energetic son who couldn't get enough of experimenting with his newfound vocabulary. She could barely get a peep out of this girl.

"We don't have time to be babysitters," Oliver reminded her. "I think Ahmad's going to have her mother admitted, which means we have to call someone to pick this girl up. The patient gave you a contact number didn't she? "

"Yeah," Alex mumbled in reply. She couldn't blame Oliver, the only nurse on duty at the moment for wanting her to help him free up the next examination room. He was even more taxed than the rest of them. But she didn't have the heart to set the little girl down. Not after one of her arms were now lazily draped over her shoulders and she was on the verge of falling asleep. Nor was she surprised to hear that her mother was being shipped off to the nearest hospital.

Given some of the teenager's responses to her questions, Alex had guessed a diagnosis herself.

And, for the first time in a long time, it had made her want to walk into the exam room with her. To make a_ real_ diagnosis, based on examination and testing, rather than guessing.

It made her realize how much she missed being a physician.

She missed both the challenge and the thrill that were at the root of her profession - that of identifying the problem, followed by the more daunting one of finding a solution. It was that last step she loved the most.

But now that she was holding a sleeping toddler in her arms, she realized she missed the human side of it too. The joy and the heartbreak of trying to change someone's fate.

Instead, after more than a decade of studies, followed by more years honing her skills, she was now stuck registering patients that might once have been her own.

'This is about paying the rent while doing something I'm actually capable of doing,' she reminded herself. This wasn't about returning to medicine. Besides, even if she did have a license to practice here, which she didn't, it was a lot harder to lay low as a practising physician than an administrator in a street clinic.

Turning around she saw Ahmad exit the exam room with the girl's mother. From the handful of times she'd seen him interact with patients tonight, she'd been impressed. The dignity and patience with which he treated everyone, whether it was a strung out crack addict, an irritable street worker or a punk with a head wound from a broken bottle, was inspiring. She marvelled at how he never lost his calm, never rushed a patient, even when it meant filling the waiting room to near capacity.

"I'm sending Amanda to St. Paul's," he told Alex. "Can you do me a favour and take Kayla to her grandmother? She lives in North Van and can't come down to pick her up. Take a taxi and come back after."

"Uh...sure." She didn't think it was part of the job description but that went for much of what she'd done so far.

Alex handed the sleeping girl to her young mother so she could tell her goodbye, while Ahmad took her aside.

"You did good tonight, Alex," he told her. "I apologize we had so little time to show you around, but you caught on quick. You're asking exactly the right questions. That makes it easier for me by the time I see the patient." His eyes met hers. "I'm starting to think I made the right decision."

Alex wondered whether he was referring to the fact that he'd taken a leap of faith and hired her in spite of the fact that her references didn't check out. "Thanks."

He handed her two twenty dollar bills from his pocket. "Take this for the taxi and make sure she gets home safe."

Oliver had heard his instructions and started to protest.

"Have you seen how many people are waiting here? And you're sending Alex off to babysit a little girl?"

"Ming is coming in to help out in half an hour. We'll manage until then." He said it quietly but there was no mistaking the fact that it was the end of the conversation.

By the time Alex had dropped the girl off, got back to her desk and finished her shift she was thoroughly exhausted. More so than if she'd added a few miles to her morning run after Liam had kept her awake all night.

But it was a satisfying exhaustion. The kind she used to feel after fourteen hours in a lab finally got her the results she'd been searching for.

It made her think that maybe she was ready to re-join the land of the living after all.

_Pine Valley, Pennsylvania_

_

* * *

_

Anna paced and did something she hadn't done in a while. She bit her nails between stealing countless glances at the wall clock above her.

The anger she was barely holding in combined with her anxiousness to have David return home was giving her a headache.

_That's what you get for faking one. Karma and all. _

She stopped pacing when she heard the door opening downstairs and the sound of excited voices filled the cabin.

Melissa giggled. "You swear you won't tell my Mom I had the strawberry pancakes with whipped cream? Mom thinks whipped cream should be illegal."

"Scouts honour," she heard David reply.

"What's a scout?" Leah asked.

Anna didn't catch his answer as she made her way down the stairs. But whatever he said, it made her daughter laugh.

David raised his head when he saw her coming downstairs. "Hey, baby. You feeling better?"

Anna ignored the question turning to Melissa instead. "Do you mind taking Leah out to the swings for a few minutes? I need to talk to David alone."

Melissa eyed her with her customary perception. Trying to read her face but not succeeding when Anna smiled at her in return.

"Sure, Anna."

"Thanks."

David however knew her well enough to know something wasn't right.

"What's wrong?" he asked as soon as the girls were out of earshot.

Anna looked at him with accusation. "Have you found my sister?"

His eyes widened. The question had come out of the blue and he didn't know what to say.

"What?"

"You heard me."

"What...are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about your e-mails regarding an Alexia Merrick."

His face was a mix of shock and defensive indignation. "So you tell me you're sick, so you can hack into my computer when I'm away? Nice."

"I'd feel bad if what I saw didn't justify it."

David sighed.

"Don't make me the villain in this," Anna said softly. "And for the last goddamn time, I'm asking you to tell me the truth. The plain, simple truth."

David sat down and he suddenly looked tired and weary.

"Before she went to Africa, Robin came to me with a research paper she found in a medical journal, written by someone by the name of _A. Merrick_," David told her without hesitation. "She asked me to compare it an article that Alex wrote before she disappeared."

"And?"

"You have to understand, stem cell research pertaining to prion diseases is_ not_ my field. Sure the research topics and presentation style were similar to something Alex wrote, but a lot of things didn't connect. The article was published in a third rate journal, the research results had no significance of any sort...it didn't make sense for a researcher of Alex's calibre to publish something like that."

"Unless of course she deliberately wanted to lay low..."

"Merrick is a common English name, Anna," David added. "I figured there was no point in getting your hopes up with something that would likely turn out to be nothing more than a coincidence."

"I see," Anna whispered, her anger not the least bit assuaged. The opposite in fact. She felt it threatening to erupt again. "Heaven forbid I should have the chance to make that decision myself."

David narrowed his brows, angry too now. "Did you already forget that your obsession to find your sister nearly ended up with you being run over by a car in Toronto? Forgive me if my first thought when I found this wasn't to send you down that same path again."

"And now?" she pressed, indifferent to his anger. "Should I be getting my hopes up at this point? Or should I keep waiting until I get the okay from you? Until this Alexia Merrick disappears again?"

"I asked an old colleague of mine, a stem cell researcher, to make contact with Alexia Merrick. In order to pick her brain while giving me time to try and track her down."

Anna seethed. "Did you ever consider that Sean and I might have the resources to _help _you track her down?"

David's expression was equally furious. "Can you take a step back for a moment and consider that maybe this woman isn't Alex? That she's just another scientist whose name happens to resemble your sister's?"

"What do _you_ think?"

"I think if it_ is_ Alex, it doesn't make any sense."

"What do you mean?"

"If Alex is alive and well and writing research papers in Canada, why in god's name hasn't she let any of us know? Explain that to me?"

Anna leaned against the wall of the hallway. Her head was pounding now. "Just because she's writing a research paper doesn't mean she's well. What I'm asking is, from the contact you and your colleague have had with her so far...is it possible that it is Alex?"

David took a moment to consider her question. "It's...yeah, I guess it's possible. From the correspondence Levy's had with her so far, it's become apparent that she's a very skilled researcher. But then so are a lot of scientists..."

"You've tracked her to Vancouver?"

"According to the head of IT at Seaview, yeah, the ISP she's using to communicate with Levy originates from Vancouver, yes. Not that that necessarily means _she's_ in Vancouver."

"Do you have an exact address?"

"I have an address that matches the ISP address, yes."

Anna bit her lip. Anger aside, she had to hand it to him. He'd done an admirable job of following through with the information Robin gave him. Initiating communication through the research article, verifying the facts as they trickled through, taking painstaking care not to spook his subject...she could envision herself and Sean following a very similar procedure. "I'd like to have it," was all she said.

David's irritation was written all over his face. "What are you going to do with it? Take the next flight to Vancouver?"

"I'm going to find out what I can about the occupant of the address in question."

David got up to stand next to her. "Look, Anna...I know you're upset. But surely you can understand why I didn't want to share this with you until..."

Anna didn't let him continue. "What I understand is that you don't think I can handle much of anything."

"That's not true..."

"What if something else comes up? What if Robin gets sick? Or you lose your job? Would you keep that from me too? Just in case I can't bear it?"

"You're not being fair," he said softly. "All I ever wanted was to keep you safe..."

"Oh no...you're not going to play that card again," Anna looked at him in disbelief. "And you're certainly not going to use it to justify this."

"It's the truth..."

"No...that's not the truth. The truth is that you're trying to control my life. You think it's up to you to decide what's best for me and to determine what I can and can't handle! That somehow you know what's good for me better than I do. I've been on my own since I was a teenager, David! I've always accepted the risks that come with the life that I chose to lead. Sure, I've made some _really _bad decisions in my time and some of them hurt me...and you know what? I'm probably going to make a few more bad decisions along the way...and I'll probably get hurt again. But I'll take _that_ chance over losing the right to make them. If you can't handle that...then we _really _have a problem."

"Yeah..." David face couldn't hide the sting left by her words. "I guess we do."

He didn't bother with any more apologies. Instead he turned his back on her and walked away. Leaving her standing alone in the hallway.

_Kigali, Rwanda_

_

* * *

_Robin's eyes were half closed when Sandrine went back to her room.

"Did you call Jean-Luc?" she asked.

Sandrine smiled. "Yes. I did. He said is going to come see you tomorrow."

"Thanks." Robin opened her eyes, still looking sleepy. "Tomorrow? I'm going to stay here another night?"

"The doctor says you still have a fever. He wants to make sure it is gone before he sends you home. I'm going to go home now and let you sleep but I will be back tomorrow too."

Robin pushed herself up, to sit against her pillows. "Sandrine...there's something I wanted to ask you before you leave."

Sandrine swallowed. "Sure."

"You said your husband is man you were looking for when we met in Paris. Your partner in the WSB."

"Yes..." Sandrine suddenly felt uncomfortable. Like she'd almost made it to the finish line but if she stayed here for another moment it would soon be impossible.

"If he's the man who helped Alex escape from Faison...he's someone that my Mom's been looking for. I remember her telling me that she hadn't been able to get a hold of Roger Saunders, that the WSB in Africa kept giving her the run-around. That he was under deep cover or something. Is that true?"

"Yes," Sandrine lied. "He didn't know Anna was looking for him."

Robin's intelligent eyes were looking at her with the sudden realization that things weren't adding up. "But _you_ must have known that my Mom would want to speak with him. In fact, Alex made her promise to get a hold of him! She said you just took off from Moscow without even saying good-bye to anyone."

Sandrine closed her eyes. The moment of truth was here and maybe now was as good a moment as any. Maybe it was better that Robin found out this way, rather than seeing her father walk through the door of her room without any explanation.

"Sandrine...?"

"Before you fainted at the market, did you notice something else Robin?"

Robin was wide-awake now. "What do you mean?"

"Did you see or hear anything else?"

Sandrine could see Robin's mind trying to remember, to put the pieces together.

Robin smiled, shyly almost. "I did. But what I saw...it has nothing to do with this."

"Maybe it does. Tell me what it was," Sandrine prompted.

"It's silly, Sandrine..."

"Tell me," Sandrine pressed.

"I saw...look I thought I was dying and I heard my Dad. I heard his voice." Her smile widened. "He sounded _so_ real. Like he was there with me at the market. It's incredible, isn't it? What the mind can conjure up in moments like that. It's almost enough to make you believe in ghosts."

"Maybe what you saw and heard was real."

Robin looked at her as though she was crazy. She also sensed a trace of anger on the young woman's face.

"What are you saying, Sandrine?

_Be gentle, _Sandrine reminded herself. This was going to be one of the biggest shocks of her life. "Robin...what I'm going to tell you is going to sound unbelievable, but it's true."

Robin was wide awake now.

"Roger Saunders and Robert Scorpio are the same person. My partner is your father."

Robin chuckled, but her eyes were dead serious. "This is not funny, Sandrine. I don't want to play games with you."

"Remember when I came to your place in Paris, and saw the photo of you and your parents, and I asked you about your Dad? It wasn't because of the WSB connection. It was because I wanted to see your reaction..."

Robin bit her lip and said nothing.

"When I disappeared in Moscow, it was because Robert wouldn't let your mother and Sean see him."

"I don't believe..."

Sandrine made sure her voice was calm. Gentle. But at the same time she wanted to bombard her with the facts. Given her no chance to consider that she wasn't telling her the truth. "It's why Anna couldn't get a hold of Roger Saunders afterwards. Because Robert Scorpio made sure she couldn't. It's why Alex probably insisted your mother get in touch with him...because_ she_ knew who he really was."

Robin shook her head. Completely unconvinced. "Alex wouldn't not tell..."

"Robert had just saved her life. She owed him."

Robin laughed out of sheer disbelief. "You are so full of it...I don't believe a word you're saying. I don't know why you'd tell me something like this or what's in it for you."

"I'm not lying to you, Robin."

Anna's daughter looked more furious than Sandrine thought she was capable.

"Look, if my Dad's alive, prove it. Bring him in here. Otherwise get out of my room and don't come back."

"Are you ready to see him?"

"I can't believe this..." Robin narrowed her eyes. "As if..."

Sandrine got up. It only hit her now how very tired she was.

She'd done the first step. The rest was up to Robert.

She turned to Robin before leaving the room. "I'm going to get him. Then you can decide for yourself whether I'm lying or not."

Sandrine half expected Robin to come after her. Instead she stayed put, stunned.

She didn't see Robert until she started walking down the corridor.

"Hey, sweetheart...how'd it go?"

Sandrine looked him in the eye, not envying the encounter he had to face next. "She knows," she told him in a whisper. "I told her. It's your turn now. _You_ need to go see her."

_Pine Valley, PA _

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_

* * *

_

"You okay, Anna?" Melissa asked. Her perceptive eyes noticed absolutely everything. It almost made Anna dread the time when Leah would be her age.

"I'm fine, sweetie," she reassured her. "David and I just had a little disagreement, that's all."

Anna saw the apprehension on the girl's face and she almost felt bad for telling her as much. This house was Melissa's escape from her own lack of domestic bliss, and Anna could tell that she dreaded the thought of losing it. Then again, she'd had enough lies for one day today.

Melissa reached up to give her a hug. "Thanks for having me. It was really nice."

Anna smiled, hugging her tightly. "Having you was really nice." She'd barely finished her sentence they heard a knock on the door.

Leah ran up to give the girl a final hug too. "Next time stay more longer."

Anna managed a forced smiled for the Senator's wife. "How lovely to see you..."

"Is Melissa ready? I'm afraid I don't have much time. There's a recital we need to attend this evening. Very last minute. Melissa, you'll need to change into something that will make you look like the young woman that you are."

"Mom, do I have..."

"Oh, yes you do..."

Anna watched the exchange in silence. She heard Melissa groan but by that time she was already halfway out the door.

She raised her hand and waved a mock good-bye. "Nice to see you too...anytime you want to leave her here for good, you let us know..."

"Anna..."

David suddenly stood behind her, his face sombre, holding their cordless phone in his hand. The fact that he made no move to touch her made Anna realize he was still fuming.

Anna didn't care. It wasn't as though she was ready for reconciliations yet.

"There's a call for you. It's important..."

"Who is it?"

"It's Sandrine Mutanga."

"_Sandrine_?" Anna looked at him puzzled. "I haven't heard from her since she disappeared off the face of the Earth in Moscow. Why in the world...?"

"Apparently she's in Kigali. At a hospital. With Robin."


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7 **

_Vancouver, Canada_

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_

* * *

_

Alex moved the toy train off her desk chair and sat down with a sigh.

"This is not adding up," she mumbled aloud, frustrated.

She prided herself on being good with numbers. Basic mathematics and accounting were much like science. Logical and linear. If you knew what you were doing, the numbers rewarded you by adding up.

Except this time they didn't.

After deducting rent, utilities, phone, internet bills and the minimum payment on her credit card, the amount she was left with was exactly two hundred and three dollars. And seventy-two cents.

"How the hell do people live on these wages?" She bit on a finger nail, searching for something else to deduct. "I can barely feed the three of us on that for two weeks, never mind anything else we might need, like gas for the car..."

"Alejandra? _Vas a comer?"_

Alex saw Maria's face in the doorway. "In a sec..."

"Before it gets cold, _por favor_!"

"Okay, Mum."

Alex smirked as she imagined the face the old woman was making. Alex was certain she didn't hate being called that as much she pretended. Suddenly seeing Maria's face made her realize something else. "Damn...I haven't paid Maria yet." Most struggling, single mothers probably didn't have live-in nannies.

Before this month, it had all come out of her bank account. On the first of every month. Like clockwork.

That was before the funds ran out.

Maria once told her that she sent the bulk of her income to her son in Spain. That he could use it more than her since he'd lost his job. It was one of the very few snippets of her personal life she'd shared with Alex.

The thought made Alex feel guilty. She should have taken action before this. Should have gotten a job months ago. Not waited until there was nothing left.

Except that a few months ago she was still struggling to put one foot in front of the other, to make it through a day without breaking into tears, and to have a simple conversation with another human being without wanting to crawl out of her own skin.

It was ironic, she thought, the fact that her savings had lasted _exactly_ as long as she'd needed them to last.

Alex leaned back in her chair. Grateful, as she was for the job at the clinic, she had to find a way to supplement her income.

"I've got to get access to one of the university labs here..."

She checked her e-mail hoping to find another one from Levy Rosenberg. His last couple of e-mails had been about his latest research project. It surprised Alex that he shared as much of it with her as he did, but she wasn't complaining. The project was a fascinating one that involved the use of safe stem cell tissue for the treatment of spinal cord injuries. Alex had read over his earlier findings, spotted a couple of tiny oversights and pointed them out to him, hoping his ego could handle it.

The fact that he kept e-mailing her with additional theories told her he was handling it alright. Or at least that his ego was ultimately smaller than his love of research.

_How about a job for me, Levy? _

Alex smiled at the thought. It was a ludicrous thought. Alexandra Devane might have had weightier credentials than Rosenberg; Alexia Merrick on the other hand was a nobody whose only claim to fame was publishing two articles in a journal that barely anyone read.

Even if Levy were crazy enough to take an unproven scientist under his wing, it wasn't as though she was ready for that kind of exposure. There were far too many people in that world that might recognize her, especially at the level Rosenberg was working at.

_Telling your family that you're alive is exposure too, _she reminded herself.

Alex bit her lip. A few days ago she'd been determined to make contact with Dimitri and Andrei, to hell with the consequences. In fact she wanted it so badly, it was hard not to hop on the next flight to London. Now she wasn't sure anymore.

_How do I return to the land of the living and keep Liam safe from Faison at the same time? _

Was it even possible?

But what was the alternative? Trying to eke out a life of anonymity by working a series of low wage jobs? Until now she'd been able to live comfortably while on the run because she had the finances to do it. That wasn't the case anymore.

And that thought terrified her. What if Faison _did_ find her here?

She no longer had the means to go back on the run.

The realization made her heart beat faster.

'If only I could get licensed to practice here...' she thought. If she could somehow forge enough documentation so that Alex Devane's credentials became Alexia Merrick's. 'Then I could go to some northern settlement and practice in the middle of nowhere.' Judging from some ads she'd seen, the Canadian government was always looking for physicians to set up practice in some of the country's most remote settlements. In exchange they were given a whole host of financial incentives.

'Sean Donely could help me when it comes to the forged documents...' In fact, he'd helped her get away from Moscow initially, along with Anna. Had inadvertently told her enough about creating a false identity to help get her this far on her own. But he'd never help her now without telling Anna where she was, even if he did feel like he owed her one. Sean and Anna were far too close for that.

'Anna...'

The thought of her sister brought another smile to her face.

She missed her crazy, fearless, impulsive sister. No one could make her laugh like Anna and she had loved every minute that she'd been able to spend with her since getting to know her.

They were so different, the two of them. Yet so alike at the same time. Sometimes Alex felt as though they really could read other's thoughts.

"I miss you, Anna. I miss you so much. You and Robin both. And I'm dying to see Leah again. I know I've hurt you by staying away from you, and I'm not sure if you'll ever forgive me..."

_"Alejandra!" _

Maria's voice nearly made her jump out of her chair. Alex didn't think the old woman had it in her to yell so loud.

"Coming!"

Alex turned off the computer. It was all so damn complicated. But she'd figure it out.

After dinner.

_King Faisal Hospital, Kigali, Rwanda_

__

_

* * *

_

Robert Scorpio didn't think he heard right.

"What did you say?"

Sandrine sat down on a chair in the empty waiting room. "I told Robin. About you."

"You what...?"

"She thinks I'm crazy, and lying and trying to play mind games. Naturally. Who can blame her? You need to go in there and clear things up."

Robert's heart started racing. It was too soon. He didn't prepare himself for this. He wasn't ready to do this right now. He needed to think about what he was going to say. You didn't just waltz into your daughter's hospital room after she thought you'd been dead for over ten years.

"Sandi, I'm not ready..."

Sandrine put a hand on her belly. "You are never going to be ready, _mon amour_. There is never going to be a perfect moment that you get to choose. You are going to go in there now and see her, if you are ready or not. If you can't think of anything to say, then you are just going to hold her and tell her how much you love her, okay?"

Robert nodded, unable to speak.

Sandrine was right. There was never going to be a perfect moment.

Now was as perfect a moment as any.

He felt her squeeze his hand.

"You are going to find the right words, you will see," she said softly. "Let your love for her guide you."

"Okay..." Robert wondered if he looked alright. He couldn't remember if his hair was combed or whether his blue, khaki shirt was wrinkled.

"You look fine," Sandrine reassured him.

"Did I say anything?"

She smiled. "You didn't have to."

"I'm going..."

"Yes. Go. Before I push you through the door." She leaned back in the chair. "Oh...and Robert. There is something else. After I called the MSF office that Robin asked me to call, I also called Anna."

Robert stopped dead in his tracks. "_You what_?"

"She's her mother. She has a right to know that her daughter is in the hospital."

"Did you tell...?" Robert felt his knees give in. This was too much all at once.

"No. I will leave that up to Robin. Or you."

_Pine Valley, USA _

__

_

* * *

_

Leah tugged at her arm. "Come play piano with me."

Anna shook her head. "Not now."

_"Please?" _She said it with the dramatic desperation of a three-year old. As if the instrument might self-combust instantaneously if her mother didn't comply right now.

David snuck up behind Leah, scooping his daughter up in his arms while kissing the top of her pony-tailed head. "I'll come play with you, but I want you to start the song before me."

"Come now," she insisted. "You and Mom."

"We'll both come but only if you start first, okay?"

She gave him one of Anna's sceptical looks. "Promise?"

"Promise."

He set Leah back down and gave her a nudge before she ran off into the study. He could hear her eager fingers pushing down the keys only moments later.

David sat down next to her. "What did Sandrine say?"

Anna stared into space. Nothing that Sandrine Mutanga said made sense. The mere fact that she called her didn't make sense.

"I spent two years trying to get a hold of that woman," Anna said softly. "Her and her partner, Roger Saunders, disappeared into thin air after Moscow." She turned to look at David. "And now she calls from Rwanda to tell me she ran into Robin at a market in Kigali, where she fainted and that Sandrine then took her to a hospital? _Am I supposed to believe a word of it?" _

"Did you tell her that?"

"I don't even remember what I told her," Anna realized. "All I could think about was Robin, in a hospital in Africa..."

"What else did Sandrine say?"

Anna thought back to conversation and now that she gave it a moment's thought, it seemed more than just surreal. "She said...that she knows it's a shock to hear from her. That there are other things she needs to tell me. And that I should come to Rwanda because Robin is going to need me."

"Are you serious?" David looked at her with concern now. "Did she say what was wrong with Robin?"

"She said..." Anna felt warm tears running down her cheeks now, against her will. "That it's to do with the HIV. That she wasn't able to take her meds properly and it made her ill."

"We can't believe her unless we speak to Robin," David warned her. "All of it sounds suspicious."

Anna wiped the tears from her face, not wanting David's comfort right now. Not wanting to give him the chance to offer it. "I know..."

"Did she tell you what hospital Robin checked into? Then I can contact the chief of staff there," he suggested.

Anna bit her lip. David was right. She had to start thinking straight. Like the trained agent she once was. Not like a panicked mother picturing worst case scenarios.

"King...something." The name sounded like Faison and it made her shudder.

David squeezed her hand. "I'll find it. Kigali's not very big. There can't be that many hospitals there." David squeezed her hand and then got back up when he heard Leah calling him. "Don't do anything drastic until we know more."

Anna nodded. What time was it in Rwanda anyway? She'd forgotten how many hours ahead it was. Why not call right now and ask to speak to Robin? "I'll look it up online if you can keep Leah occupied."

"Tell me what you find. And if Robin really is there I still want to speak to her attending physician."

_Why would Sandrine lie about something like that? _

'Why does Sandrine do anything she does?' Anna realized as she watched David leave. She barely knew the woman. The WSB agent had joined forces with her, Sean, Dimitri and Dan O'Toole two years ago in Paris on their search for Alex, after her kidnapping. Sandrine hadn't joined them on Alex's behalf. She had her own agenda. She was searching for her partner, who'd been tracking Faison on a blood diamond trail.

Sean Donely distrusted Sandrine Mutanga right from the get-go, but they did a thorough background check on her and everything matched the story she'd told them.

Throughout the investigation it seemed like she was on their side, until they got a solid lead on Faison in Moscow and Sandrine promptly went missing. But not before telling them via a phone call that her partner had escaped Faison's lair and delivered an injured Alex to a Moscow hospital.

_That _was the last Anna had heard from Sandrine Mutanga.

Both her and Sean had called the Central African division of the WSB countless times after that, in an attempt to speak to her and her mysterious partner. But the two of them might as well have fallen off the face of the earth.

Until now.

'Until now when you call to tell me that Robin is ill and needs me...'

Anna massaged her temples, not sure what to believe.

'I_ am_ sure about two things,' she thought. 'I know I won't do anything you tell me until I speak to Robin. And I know that you are most definitely hiding something, Sandrine...'

_King Faisal Hospital, Kigali, Rwanda_

__

_

* * *

_

Robin Scorpio wasn't sure whether to laugh or to worry.

_Really_ worry.

Sandrine Mutanga, who wasn't even supposed to _be_ in Rwanda, runs into her just as she faints at a downtown market. Then she brings her to a hospital only to tell her, _her father was alive? _

_None_ of it made any sense.

It was so crazy Robin wanted to laugh. That and pinch herself to wake up from it all.

Although she'd already tried that and it didn't work.

She was still here in this room, trying to make sense of what just happened. She felt warm and vaguely uncomfortable. She knew she was running a fever, but she also knew it wasn't enough to make her completely delusional.

'Think,' she scolded herself. 'Pretend you're Mom. Think like an investigator.'

How would Sandrine even know about her father?

'Sandrine was or still _is_ with the WSB, even if she does look like she's going to give birth in a few weeks,' Robin reminded herself. 'And Dad was quite the WSB legend in his time. Sandrine_ did_ ask about him when she came to my apartment in Paris and saw his photo...that wasn't a lie.'

_"I asked because I wanted to see your reaction." _

'If Mom and Faison survived the tanker explosion why would it be so crazy to think that Dad did too?' Robin asked herself. It wasn't the first time she asked herself that question. But it _was_ the first time she genuinely toyed with the idea of believing it.

'Except Mom had an extremely rare case of retrograde amnesia. She didn't know who she was. That's why she stayed away from her family all these years. The chances of Dad surviving the explosion with the exact same, rare condition are close to nil...which means if he survived, he purposely stayed away from his family. Which makes even less sense...unless...'

'Unless he's not the man you thought he was,' Robin answered her own question. There was so much that happened before and after that tanker explosion that Robin didn't know about. So much of her parents' history with Faison that she didn't know about.

Her only link to it all was her mother and there were parts of it her mother didn't remember. And parts she no doubt didn't _want _to remember and share with her daughter.

"Would you want to share all the dumb mistakes you made in your youth with your future kids?" she wondered aloud. Robin managed a smile. "Probably not."

Was there a chance that her father was alive and that her mother_ knew_?

That thought made her frown. She might be able to accept that her mother had her share of secrets, but_ that_ wasn't one she'd forgive her for keeping. 'If that's the case neither Mom or Dad are who I thought they were...'

She couldn't think of a single logical thread to tie it all too.

'You'd make a lousy investigator,' she thought with a sigh.

Her mind was still racing when she saw the doorknob turning from the corner of her eye.

Robin was floored by what she saw next.

By the man who stepped through the door and brought back a flood of memories.

He was older than in her memories. His hair more white than anything else now and his back stooped ever so slightly. But he was still handsome, maybe even more so than she remembered. He looked strong and unflappable. Calm and healthy. _Just_ as she remembered.

His impossibly blue eyes were warm and alert, and focused on only one thing.

Her.

"Hello, luv."

***Many thanks to my two awesome editors, Annie and Kel. :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8 **

_King Faisal Hospital, Kigali, Rwanda_

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_

* * *

_

Even now when she saw him standing across from her she wasn't sure whether to believe it. Whether her eyes weren't playing tricks on her after all.

"Dad?"

She said it cautiously, as if saying it too loud might make the vision across from her disappear.

"Hi, Robin," he answered. His sky-blue eyes still fixated on her although they were moist now. His voice sounded shaky to her, in an odd contrast to the physical strength he exuded.

The voice _was _his though. Unmistakeably so. It was the exact same voice she heard back at the market.

It all sunk in now . Sandrine wasn't lying. It _was_ true. Her father was alive and he was here, standing in a hospital room in Africa with her.

That delayed realization set off a whole torrent of emotions. Beginning with a rush of tears that she couldn't stop.

"Dad..."

He moved towards her and he wrapped his familiar arms around her, holding her as though he never wanted to let go.

Robin buried her face in him, not wanting to let go either.

_Vancouver, Canada_

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_

* * *

_

It was in the third night that the exhaustion hit her.

The realization that she wasn't quite accustomed to being up all night and sleeping a handful of hours during the day.

It was quieter tonight than it had been the last two nights. Normally there were at best a couple of empty seats in the waiting room. Tonight only two of them were occupied. Maybe Sunday was a day of rest here too.

Alex yawned, not sure whether slow would be a good thing. She'd already done the paperwork for the two men sitting in the room waiting to be examined. Sure, there was filing to be done, but it was mind-numbingly boring and she couldn't bring herself to do it. Instead, she walked over to the coffee machine that sat on the counter behind her desk and poured herself a cup of the bitter brew.

She should've spent the afternoon sleeping instead of taking Liam to the train station.

But her son was inexplicably crazy about trains and Alex loved the look on his face each time another rolled into the station. They got lucky this afternoon. The sleek Trans-Canada with its glass dome arrived today after its four-day journey across the country. That one had impressed Liam the most. So much so that he stared at it in uncustomary silence, before grabbing her hand and trying to make a run for it. Wanting to touch it and see it up close.

Alex smiled at the recollection, remembering that she promised him they'd ride it one day.

She was too lost in her thoughts to hear the stranger approach her from behind, until he nearly stood next to her.

"Can I help...?"

Before she had a chance to finish her sentence his arm was around her neck, a large knife blade hovering next to her face.

"Open the cabinet...the one with the drugs," he demanded as he tightened his grip on her. He held her so tight she could barely breathe, never mind speak.

Panic rose up in her throat and Alex heard a gasp from one of the men in the waiting room. The other one ran out of the clinic.

_What the hell? Bloody coward. _

Ahmad was in one of the exam rooms, and Oliver, the nurse, in the other. Unless Alex managed to make some serious noise, they wouldn't hear her.

"Open the damn cabinet!"

"Can't..." She struggled to form the words under his strangle-hold. "I can't...". The pharmacy counter was closed at night, and save for Ahmad no one else had access to it.

Alex could smell the mix of alcohol, cigarette smoke and sweat on the man's skin. He was dressed in dirty clothes and judging from the look in his eyes and the way his hand shook when he held the knife, probably going through withdrawal.

A junkie in desperate need of a fix. Any fix.

"If you don't open the cabinet, I'll kill you!"

Alex's heart pounded so hard she could hear it ring in her ears. The man was out of his mind. He'd do it, she didn't doubt it for a second. He probably didn't even want to hurt her, but the need for the next fix was greater than any rational thought.

The thought made her knees go weak.

She hadn't come this far, to end like this.

She saw Liam's smiling face at the train station. Andrei riding Tempus, with the subtle gentle, skill of a natural. And Dimitri. Looking at her as though he never tired of it.

Three unforgettable loves.

The thought made her react. Like her mother once taught her to.

Alex's knees buckled and she knocked the intruder off balance as her weight dragged him down. She used his momentary distraction to grab the hand that was holding the knife, smashing it against the wall behind them.

Even though he was bigger and stronger than her, his hand-eye co-ordination was shot and his reaction time was as slow as Alex hoped it would be.

Once both of them were on the ground, her elbow quickly made its way into his solar plexus and he yelped in pain.

He saw the knife on the floor and grabbed it, trying to strike the centre of her body with it. But Alex was too quick and rolled away from him and the knife caught her arm instead. She retaliated with a kick straight to his collar bone that made him yell out a second time.

He grabbed the knife again and instead of striking again, he picked it up and half ran, half stumbled out of the clinic.

It was fair to say that it was all over before it really began.

Alex leaned against the wall, her heart still racing.

The noise had brought Ahmad and Oliver running out of their exam rooms and into the reception area.

Ahmad crouched down next to her. "Alex...what the hell happened?"

"Some punk came in...he grabbed me from behind." Her voice sounded shaky and foreign to her. "He wanted me to open the pharmacy counter."

One of the men in the waiting room ambled up to them, his face pale. "He...he had a knife at her throat."

Alex glared at him. _And where the hell were you when he did? You better be hampered by some serious illness, buddy. _

"Jesus Christ, Alex..." Ahmad muttered. "Oliver call the police."

Alex's eyes widened. "No...please, don't."

The last thing she wanted, or needed, was _that_ kind of attention.

Ahmad looked at her, not understanding. "Someone came in here and attacked you. He might have killed you. We_ need_ to report it to the police."

"It was a junkie who needed a fix," she said slowly, willing herself to calm down._ Willing_ to make him see how utterly useless a police report would be. "He didn't take anything and I didn't...I didn't even get a good look at him."

Oliver eyed her with suspicion. "I'm calling the police..."

Ahmad's eyes met hers, letting her know he didn't agree but would play along. "Oliver...wait. It's up to Alex."

"No, it's not!"

Alex wanted to kick him. Oliver didn't like her and she had no idea why. _Are you really still irritated because I left the clinic two nights ago to take a toddler to her grandmother? Really?_

"Fine," Ahmad agreed. "_I'm_ telling you to hold off. Alex is right. If she can't give them a description and he didn't take anything, it's pointless."

Alex exhaled, grateful. Oliver turned around and gave her a disgusted look.

Ahmad smiled. "Don't mind him. It's not personal. He doesn't want to be here. He hates his job and it makes him miserable." He smirked, adding softly. "He wants to be a botanist." Ahmad held out his hand. "Let me help you up."

Alex let him, as he pointed to her arm.

"You're hurt."

Alex hadn't noticed the throbbing or the blood-stain on her blouse, until just now, when the adrenaline was starting to wear off. The punk must've managed to get a stab in when he grabbed the knife from the floor.

He helped her up and led her to the exam room. "Let me take a look at it."

Alex winced when she realized where the cut was. The idea of rolling up her sleeve made her cringe.

"Where did you learn to fight like that?" he wanted to know.

"I wasn't fighting. I took a few self-defense classes, that's all."

He raised his brows. "I see."

Alex cringed. _Why are you so damn defensive? What's wrong in telling him you know martial arts? Anna has a black belt and she's proud of it. _

_Except she didn't earn it against her will. _

"Why don't you lie down. You're probably feeling light-headed."

"I'd rather sit."

He looked mildly amused. "Fine, then."

He slowly pulled back the sleeve of her blouse. "I won't ask why you don't want to police here...but I hope you are not in more trouble than you can handle."

"I'm not," she promised. "Thank you...for trusting me. Even though you barely know me."

He smiled. "My wife says I'm a sucker." His expression changed when he saw the tattoo. "What the hell..."

Alex felt her cheeks flush. "We all do stupid things when we're young."

She felt his index finger running along the contours of Faison's branding.

"It's not just a tattoo," he observed. "The skin is raised like..."

"It's a branding," she explained before he got a chance to ask.

"What does it mean?" he asked with clinical curiosity. "It looks like letters."

"Nothing. It means nothing."

He turned his gaze away from the tattoo to meet her eyes. A moment of intimate silence between them told him it was all the answer he was going to get. "Must have hurt."

"What hurts is the cut...the one that's bleeding now."

This time Ahmad looked sheepish. "I'm sorry...it's just that..."

"It's jarring, I know," she agreed. "It's why I don't wear short sleeves."

"It's..._unexpected_," he said. "But it's also none of my business."

Alex winced as he cleaned the cut. He was precise, gentle and efficient to a fault, making Alex think that this was much more than just a profession for him. It was his passion and that fact made her like him even more.

"It's deeper than I thought, I'm going to put in a couple of stitches. Do you want something to numb the pain?" Ahmad asked her.

"I _could_ use a stiff drink..."

The suggestion didn't make him flinch. "Wait a second..."

He left the room and Alex stared after him, baffled.

He came back moments later, with a bottle of brandy in one hand and a coffee mug in the other. "I don't drink...but if that's what you'd like right now..." He shrugged.

Alex raised her brows. "Where in the world did you...?"

"Old Serge is in the waiting room. I'm not that naive to think he doesn't have some with him."

Alex laughed. "You stole a bottle of brandy from one of our patients?"

"No, no..." he corrected her, holding up his hand. "Not stole. He was happy to give it to me. Said you deserve it."

He poured a generous amount into a coffee mug and handed it to her. _Not just passionate_ _and skilled, but highly unorthodox_. _I think I like your modus operandi, Dr. Hussain . _

Alex took it gratefully and swallowed a large sip. The last time she drank to numb her pain was at Alexei Estate. The thought made her shiver. She wondered how many more memories of Alexei Estate would be conjured up after what happened tonight.

_Please don't let this lead me down that road again. Not now, when I was starting to think I could maybe live a normal life again. One where I don't want to crawl out of my own skin every day. _

Ahmad had already started the stitches. "You alright?"

"Yeah..."

"I'm sorry...this will mess up the tattoo."

_You couldn't mess up that bloody mess if you tried. _"It's okay. Really."

"A tetanus shot and then we're done."

Alex took another generous sip of brandy. "Thanks. For everything."

"Can I call someone who will come pick you up?"

"What?"

"Is there a husband? A family member?"

Alex shook her head suddenly aware of what he meant. Suddenly angry that this punk was going to deprive her of a day's income, on top of everything else. "No...but really I'm fine."

He ignored her protest. "There isn't anyone?"

"No," she repeated. "There isn't and really, let me sit down for ten minutes and I'll be okay..." Besides, it was dead here tonight and it wasn't as though she was performing brain surgery.

"Alex!" He looked at her incredulously. "You're going home."

Alex bit her tongue. She'd seen how resolute he could be and knew better than to argue.

"You'll be paid for the night," he added, mumbling.

It was as if he could read her mind and it made Alex blush a dozen shades of red. "It's not that..."

"Just letting you know," he mumbled.

Alex frowned. Either her emotions were an open book or he was way too adept at reading her. "Let me take the cab home alone, alright?"

He folded his arms. "Fine. Call me when you get home."

The taxi came in a few minutes and Alex walked through the doors of her home shortly afterwards. Her hands had stopped shaking by the time she walked into the living room.

Both Maria and Liam were fast asleep and Alex took care not to make enough noise to wake them.

In spite of her earlier protests, she was glad to be home and away from the clinic. The adrenaline rush had fully worn off, her arm hurt and she was hit by a wall of exhaustion that made her collapse into bed.

She wondered when the night's events would hit her. Whether she'd break into tears. Or panic as a familiar sense of helplessness would all but overwhelm her.

Neither of them happened yet.

She called Ahmad to let him know she was home safe. And then she fell into deep, dreamless and welcome sleep.

_Kigali, Rwanda _

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_

* * *

_

Robert Scorpio realized that Sandrine was right. As usual.

There was no right moment to face Robin and he certainly wouldn't have thought a hospital room in Kigali was the right place for this reunion, but at the same time this moment felt more perfect than any he could have imagined.

Robin was here, next to him.

He still couldn't quite get _that_ reality into his head. That his arms were wrapped around his beautiful, precious daughter. Around the only person he'd loved the moment he first set eyes on her.

_How in the world have I been able to live so long without being near you, luv? _

Robin pushed away from him as she wiped away a tear. "I can't believe you're here, Dad..."

He kissed her forehead. "I know...this is a shock. If it's too much too handle. Let me know. Please...I don't want to do anything that could cause you stress."

She smiled a lop-sided smile. "This is pretty good stress...I think I'm okay with it." Her fingers reached out to touch his face, a gesture that made her eyes water again. "It really is you..."

_How could I have ever thought that she was better off without me? _

Again, she wiped away the tears with the back of her hand, unable to take her eyes off him. She took a deep breath and suddenly looked serious. "Are you going to tell me how this is possible?" she asked softly.

At the question, he also took a deep breath. Of course she'd want to know how. Robert wasn't sure she'd accept his answers. For now, he was still overwhelmed by her reaction. By the joy and tears in her eyes. Two things he hadn't expected. Hadn't dared to ask for. But Robin loved him. For reasons he didn't dare question, she loved him unconditionally, as though he hadn't walked out of her life over ten years ago.

_I don't deserve that love. I know I don't. _

"It's a long story, luv..."

She laid back down on the pillow, holding on to one of his hands. "I'm not going anywhere..."

"You're tired, sweetheart, and the doctor says you have a fever. Why don't you get some rest and I promise you I'll come back in the morning and answer every question you have."

"Are you kidding me?" Robin looked at him in disbelief and for a moment she reminded him so much of Anna. "Do you really think I'll be able to sleep if all I can think of is how in the world it's possible that you're alive and here...?" She gave him a smile. "You can leave when I fall asleep...but not before then, Dad. No way."

Robert couldn't stop staring at her.

He'd seen photos of her all these years, so he knew very well what she looked like now. Knew that she'd grown into a beautiful young woman. But photos couldn't compare to seeing her as he did now, propped up on a pillow next to him. They couldn't compare to how it felt to look into her eyes and see a part of himself look back. They couldn't compare to how it felt to have her hand grasp his, knowing he was holding on to the most precious thing he'd ever been given.

"Where do you want me to start?"

She squeezed his hand. "At the beginning. When you went after Mom...what really happened on that tanker in Venezuela?"

"How much do you know, from what your mother told you?"

She narrowed her brows, as if a disturbing realization suddenly hit her. "Wait a minute...did you...you know all along that Mom was alive?"

_What was worse? The deal I made with the devil, or the fact that I didn't try to reunite you with your mother once I knew she was alive?_

"I knew...yes." Honesty was the very least he owed her now.

Her hand slipped out of his and he could see the angry disappointment etched on her face.

"You _knew_...you knew Mom was alive, and you_ let _me think she was dead for all these years? Dad...I don't understand...I mean, at least, Mom she had an excuse! She had amnesia. She couldn't remember me!"

"It's hard to explain."

"Try me."

"When I made it to that tanker where Faison was keeping your mother, I didn't get a chance to say anything to her. She spotted me and panicked, yelling at me to get off the ship."

"Why?"

"Because she knew it was about to explode."

Robin frowned, not understanding. "How would she know?"

At the question, it was he who suddenly had a realization of his own. Anna might not have remembered that she set the explosion on the tanker. And if Anna didn't remember, it meant Robin didn't know. And if she didn't know, there was absolutely no reason to tell her.

Robert saw her questioning eyes.

_You swore you'd be honest with her. Even if the truth hurts. _

"She..." The words almost got caught in his throat. "She knew because she was the one who set the explosives."

Robin drew her head back in shock. "No way! Why would she do something like that? Especially knowing she was still on the ship. Or maybe she didn't think she'd still be on the ship when they went off?"

"That's possible," Robert agreed. It wasn't_ his_ theory. But he kind of liked this one.

"So...what happened next?"

_Good question._

"To be honest, sweetheart, I don't remember exactly what happened next either. There was a huge noise that nearly shattered my eardrums. Flames shot out from everywhere. There were dozens of oil canisters on the deck of the ship. Mind you, it was an old tanker on its way to a ship graveyard, so they were mostly empty. If they weren't I probably wouldn't be sitting here telling you this story. But there was enough oil residue left in them that whatever caught fire started to burn fast. I was on one side of the tanker and your mother was on the other. I tried to get to her, but there were so many flames, some of them taller than me, that there was no way..."

Robin's face was ashen. "But she got off the boat...you both did."

"The last thing I saw was Faison grabbing her, covering her from the flames and leaping off the other side of the tanker." He paused. "I did the same and jumped off the side I was on."

"And then?"

"Then I woke up in a hospital bed."

"But if you were brought to a hospital how come we never knew?"

"I was chained to the bed," Robert told her.

"_What_?" Robin looked at him in disbelief.

"Faison's men were the ones who found me half conscious on the shore and dragged me to a hospital. It wasn't a public hospital, but a private clinic."

"Faison saved your life?" Robin looked completely perplexed now.

Robert shrugged. "I wouldn't go that far. I probably would have survived on my own, but it was more convenient for him to have me regain consciousness on his terms. Tended to by a physician on his payroll."

"Was he hurt too?"

Robert nodded. "He was a mess. Parts of one of his arms would be scarred for life from the burn injuries. Because he shielded your mother from the flames, he took the brunt of them on himself. He was in a lot of pain when he came to see me."

Robin bit her lip, mesmerized by what he was telling her. "So he knew all along that Mom was alive too..."

"Saving your mother was a reflex action for him...but afterwards he wanted nothing more to do with her. After all, she'd just tried to kill him by blowing up the tanker."

"It doesn't make sense, Dad."

"One thing Faison still knew with certainty...no matter how bitterly disappointed he was, or how much pain and misery he was in at the time, was that I couldn't win."

"I don't understand..."

"He came to see me at the clinic. He told me that your mother also survived the explosion but was hit by a piece of debris in the water. That it caused a head injury that left her with amnesia. He also told me that I had a choice. I could die or I could live and leave you and your mother behind. That if he couldn't have you both, then neither should I."

"But how can he...?"

"He told me if I left you and your mother behind, he would leave you alone. For the rest of your lives."

He didn't add that once he realized Anna was willing to die in order to remove Faison from her life, he thought he owed it to her. Owed it to both her and Robin to have a chance at a life without that psychopath in it. Even if he had to make a deal with the devil to give it to them.

"And you agreed?" Robin looked at him incredulously. "Just like that?"

He smiled a lop-sided smile. "Well...it wasn't quite that simple. You have no idea how much I wanted to see your mother. To know whether or not she was alright and whether Faison had told me the truth about what happened to her. But keep in mind that I was chained to a hospital bed and he threatened to kill me if I didn't. I thought I'd pretend to go along with him initially and then figure out how to thwart him afterward."

Robin frowned. "So I take it you never figured it out..."

She looked utterly exhausted, but even so the sarcasm in her voice was hard to miss. He expected her anger, once the euphoria of seeing him wore off. He'd prepared himself for it, but it still hurt.

He took one of her hands in his, surprised at how warm it was. "I came up with a lot of schemes over the last few years that would have me reunited with the two of you, but every time I considered that there was a chance he'd make good on his threat and kill you, I backed off. At the end of the day, the risk wasn't worth it."

"And Mom and I, we never got a vote on whether it was worth it to us..."

Robert squeezed her hand. "Sweetheart, you really need to rest now. I don't want to lay anything else on you do."

"But there's so much more..."

Robert cut her off. "Tomorrow...I'll be here first thing in the morning, and any and every question you have I'll promise to answer as truthfully as I can."

"You swear?"

He smiled, enjoying her company. Anna used to tell him Robin was_ his_ daughter, through and through, in heart and deed. But there was a lot of Anna in her too. Not just in her dark eyes and hair, but in her fighting spirit. "I can put in it writing..."

She conceded a smile. "Funny."

He waited until she fell asleep. It was a short wait, with his hand still holding on to hers.

When he finally did let go, he spent a long, lingering minute staring at her. Awed at how the teenage girl he'd left behind had become an adult now. A strong, beautiful, capable woman, who, through some inexplicable miracle, was back in his life.

He smiled as he left the room, feeling as though he'd dropped the weight of the world from his shoulders.

* * *

Author's note: Thought a chapter in time for Christmas was my way of saying thanks to all those still reading and sticking with this fic. Well, that and I was overdue for an update! Big, fat thanks to my two awesome editors and friends, Annie and Kel, who keep me motivated, among other things.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9 **

_London, England_

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Dimitri Marick leaned over and lit her cigarette for her. "Still shaky?"

Helen was a casual smoker, but tonight this was her third in one hour.

She inhaled deeply. "Don't _ever _make me do that again."

Dimitri suppressed a smile. They'd gone out into the country this afternoon and he'd taken her riding. In the back of his mind he hoped that maybe once she sat on the back of a horse and saw the gorgeous countryside from a different perspective, it might spark some interest in riding. Really, who wouldn't love it?

He now cringed when he thought back to it.

Dimitri had helped Helen onto one of the gentlest mares at the stables. But only minutes into the ride, something had spooked the horse and she took off, leaving Helen hanging on for dear life.

Thankfully, Dimitri caught up to the animal and was able to get her to slow down.

Helen was another matter.

She'd hopped off the horse with shaky legs, given him a piece of her mind using a few English expletives he'd never heard before, on what she really she thought about his favourite pastime. Then she absolutely and firmly refused to get back on.

Now they sat on a patio by the Thames and she was still glaring at him, as she took another sip of wine. He'd ordered her favourite, a light Australian Shiraz. He figured a bouquet of flowers to go with breakfast tomorrow was probably a good idea too.

"No more countryside rides. Promise," he held up his hand in apology once more and lit a cigarette of his own. 'At least in this relationship,' he thought. 'There won't be any heated debates on who the better rider is. Not that there was_ really_ any debate in the last one...'

"I feel like I've gone through a near-death experience..." Helen mumbled. "I don't know why you insist forcing those animals on me. Obviously they don't like me and the feeling is more than mutual. No more."

"I thought maybe..."

"You thought wrong," she cut him off.

"Helen...I'm sorry," he said softly, meaning it. He was grateful that the ride didn't end with her hurt on the ground. The thought alone brought back memories of Alex breaking Tempus and nearly breaking limbs in the process.

Dimitri reached across the table to grasp Helen's hand. Why was it that everything he was trying to do to better things between them ended up backfiring somehow? Why the hell couldn't he get anything right? "Tell me what I can do to make it up to you?"

She took a deep breath and managed a smile. "You can make it up to me by taking me scuba diving off the coast of Ibiza."

Dimitri raised his brows. Ibiza. He'd all but forgotten about that.

They'd been discussing a trip after the race at Royal Ascot and he vaguely remembered agreeing to Ibiza, even if the idea didn't hold much appeal. In fact, a day later he'd all but agreed to meet a thoroughbred breeder in Dubai instead, thinking surely Helen would be just as pleased to go there. That and he'd mentioned the idea to Andrei who was already keen to go. But maybe now wasn't the best time to suggest that either. Then again, if not now, when?

"Have you ever been to Dubai?" he tried.

She took a sip of wine. "Dubai? No, why?"

"Great shops and some of the most incredible hotels in world."

"You want to go to Dubai instead?" The disappointment was clear, not just in her face but in the way she asked.

"I thought maybe..."

"I don't know. It's a Muslim country in the middle of the desert. I mean, can I even wear a bikini there?"

"Yes. I'll insist."

She wrinkled her nose. "Dimi...I _really_ like Ibiza."

Dimitri did like Ibiza at one point in his life. When he was about twenty-one and wanted nothing more than to party his life away. _Mind you, Andrei will probably love it just as_ _much as I did then_. However, at this point Ibiza appealed to Dimitri as much as a trip to Euro Disney.

"So is Andrei still coming with us?"

Dimitri stubbed out his cigarette, half finished. Not sure he understood. "Yes, of course. He's worked so hard this past year. He deserves it."

"Does he want to come with us?"

Dimitri laughed. "Sweetheart, he's not sharing a room with us. You know how he is, he'll be off doing his own thing. We'll be lucky if we see him for breakfast in the morning."

He thought he could see the relief in her face and she finally gave his hand a squeeze. "I can't wait, Dimi. It's going to be hot and fun. We're going to dance all night long, watch sunsets on a beach and drink nothing but cocktails with ridiculous little umbrellas in them and then..." She tugged at his index finger. "Well, you can fill in the blank on the rest..."

Dimitri smiled. Finally he was getting somewhere. He raised his glass in a toast. "To us...and Ibiza."

She grinned, clinking her glass with his. "To good times ahead."

_O'Hare International Airport, Chicago_

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Anna Devane eyed the departures board and cringed. Her ten o'clock departure to Washington had been changed to nearly midnight.

"What a start," she thought. As if a 28-hour trip wasn't long enough, there was now a two-hour delay before she even left the ground. "Is this where I'm supposed to be grateful that my first layover at Dulles is nearly four hours long?" Then there was another layover in Rome, followed by a final switch in airlines in Addis Ababa before she was due to arrive at Gregoire Kayibanda airport in Kigali. It was Sunday now and it would be Tuesday by the time she got to her final destination. That is, if everything went according to plan and one of her four flights didn't get cancelled all together.

_You couldn't have done relief work in Guatemala, sweetheart? _

Anna debated sitting down on one of the empty chairs in the waiting area, but knew she was too restless to stay seated. Instead, she grabbed her wheeled carry-on suitcase and decided that pacing from one end of the long hallway to the other was a better alternative. Maybe she'd find a coffee shop that sold a cup of relaxing herbal tea.

Anna stopped next to a floor-to-ceiling window and stared at the runways outside.

An Air India jet touched down just as her mind drifted back to her conversation with Robin only a few hours ago.

_"Sweetheart, are you alright? I got a call from Sandrine saying you fainted in a market. That you weren't able to take the HIV meds? Robin...what's going on?" _

_"I'm okay, Mom, really. I got sick because I couldn't keep some of the meds refrigerated out in the camp and they spoiled. They sent me back to Kigali to do some tests." _

_"Why didn't you tell me any of this before?" _

_"It was like getting the flu, Mom. I knew it would take me a week or two to get my T-cell count stable again. I didn't want you to worry." _

_"Didn't want me to worry? Robin, I'm your mother!" _

_"Mom...it's okay. I fainted because I walked around the city in the morning heat when I shouldn't have. It's going to be okay." _

_"And Sandrine? How is it possible that she of all people was there when it happened?" _

_There had been a considerable pause at the other end. "I know...it's crazy, isn't it?" _

_"Is she...?" _

_"She's been really nice, Mom. Her...her husband is paying for my stay." _

_"Tell him thank you. And that I'll take care of it when I get there. She also said I should come see you. That you needed me...Robin are you sure you're okay?"_

_"Honestly, Mom. I'm going to be fine." _

_"Do you want me to come there?" _

This time the pause had been even longer and Anna's heart had skipped a beat. No matter what she said, Anna knew Robin wasn't alright. There was something else she wasn't telling her, and her reply only confirmed that suspicion.

_"I think...yeah, I think it would be good if you came here." _

Anna had bitten her lip, not wanting her daughter to hear how afraid she was for her. _"Sweetheart, is there something else I should know?"_

_"There are some things, yeah. But it's not what you think, Mom. Can you...do you really think you can come?"_

Robin would never ask her if there wasn't a really good reason. Anna knew her daughter well enough to know that.

_"Yes...yes, of course. I'll find a way to get there as soon as possible." _

_"Mom...?"_ Her daughter's voice had been close to tears. _"Thanks." _

_"I love you, sweetheart." _

_"I love you too." _

And here is where that conversation had brought her. To O'Hare waiting for a delayed flight to Washington.

Anna bit her nails and stared out the window, hoping that whatever was wrong with Robin was something that could be fixed with a trip to Africa.

_King Faisal Hospital, Kigali, Rwanda _

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_

Robin Scorpio stared at door of her private room and yawned. She hadn't slept well. Aside from her mother's phone call there were fever-induced dreams of her father burning and screaming on a tanker that was on fire.

If he hadn't just called her telling her he was on his way to the hospital, Robin might have thought her conversation with him last night was a dream too. A better one, but a dream nonetheless.

She was still trying to fit the pieces together and even with her father's explanations last night, so much of it still didn't make sense.

_Does Mom know he's alive? Did Dad keep track of us all this time, without us knowing? What's he doing in Africa now masquerading as someone called Roger Saunders? Where does Sandrine come in to all this? _

Robin thought back to Sandrine Mutanga. She was pregnant. Very pregnant. _Is she carrying my little half-brother or sister? _

"Good morning, luv."

Her eyes still on the door, she saw her father the instant he stepped through the door.

"Morning, Dad." It felt so strange to say those two words. Together.

"I spoke to your doctor. He said he wants to do another blood test and if your levels haven't decreased you might be alright to go home today. As long you promise to rest for the next few days."

"I'd love that," Robin admitted. She knew if she wasn't in a sterile, noisy hospital room she might actually get a decent night's sleep.

He sat down next to her, taking one of her hands in his. He wore a crisp, white shirt today and a pair of dark, blue slacks that brought out the blue in his eyes. "I'd love it if you came home with me," he told her. "Sandrine and I, we have a nice big home in a gated neighbourhood, just outside the core of the city. You'd have your own bedroom, your privacy, there's a lovely backyard..."

"Dad...I..." The suggestion took her aback. "I don't know."

"I understand if you need to think about it. And I'll understand if you say no. But I want you to know that...that I'd love it if you said yes. If you let me take care of you and spoil you, even if only for a few days."

Robin took a deep breath. "What about Sandrine?"

He held up a paper bag with a smile. "Sandrine told me to bring you something. They're almond cookies. She makes them herself. It's a French recipe she fell in love with when she studied in Paris. She told me they might help your appetite come along. Really, they're that good..."

"Dad..."

"Sandrine would love it if you came to stay with us," he said softly. "Honestly."

Robin didn't know what to think. Yesterday she thought her father was dead. Today he was asking her to move in with him. Even if only for a few days to recuperate. But the truth was, she didn't trust Sandrine. The woman had known all along that her father was alive and had conveniently kept that fact to herself when she'd joined her mother and Sean in searching for Alex two years ago.

"Sandrine lied to us, the entire time she was with us in Paris," Robin told him. "She knew you were alive. _Knew_ you were my father."

He squeezed her hand. "Please don't blame Sandi for _my_ lies. She didn't want to tell you when she came to see you in Paris, because she didn't know whether or not I was alive then. I'd given her no sign of life after I left Kinshasa to track down Faison. She decided that if anything had happened to me...it would be worse to tell you the truth and then to have you find out that Faison had killed me after all."

"What about afterwards? After you got Alex out and brought her to Moscow? Why not end the whole charade then? Why the hell didn't Alex tell Mom? Did you force her to keep your secret?"

"For what it's worth...I asked Alex not to tell Anna. That's all. She didn't like it, but she agreed. I thought she might be good for her word and I see now that I was right. Sandrine on the other hand wanted me to. She wanted me to face your mother at the hospital, then and there. But I wasn't ready to face any of you. I was hurt, physically and I had to go back to Africa to tell the families of two men that a mission I took them on had cost them their lives. I couldn't face you and your mother and Sean on top of it all..."

"But that was over two years ago, Dad! What was your excuse between then and now?"

Her father's shoulder slumped and for the first time he looked as old as he was. "No excuses, luv. None."

"So you just didn't _want_ to see us?" Robin looked at him dumbfounded, knowing her voice was more bitter than she wanted it to be.

"I did want to," he said softly. "And I did go to Paris to see you."

"_What_?" Robin looked at him in disbelief.

"I went to Paris to see you and your mother a few weeks after coming back from Moscow. I waited on a bench outside your mother's apartment when I saw all of you come outside. You, and your mother. Your little sister. David Hayward. You looked happy, all of you. _Really_ happy. You made a beautiful family. A family that I didn't want to risk breaking up...a family that was no longer mine."

Robin bit her lip. "Dad, that is a bunch of..."

"I remembered what happened when Holly came back into my life after I thought she was dead," he explained, not letting her cut him off. "I remember how conflicted I felt. You and Anna...you were my family then. Yet I felt like I owed it to Holly...to let her know I still loved her. But how could do that without hurting your mother? I learned then, that you can't go back in time. The past really is a foreign country."

Robin frowned. "You're quoting L.P Hartley to try and make me understand? Sorry...not buying it."

"All of you looked so happy, luv. You were a family now and I had no right to come between that. I had no right to ask your mother to make a choice..."

"You deduced all that from one look at us from a distance?" Robin challenged him. "You say you didn't want Mom to be forced to make a choice, but what about _me_? Mom might have found another husband. _But you're the only father I have_!"

Her father made no move to avoid her glare, or defend himself against her accusations. It was the only way he knew how to fight his battles. Head on. That was exactly how she remembered him. _You haven't changed in that respect, Dad. _

"I'm not trying to say I made the right decisions, luv. I'm just telling you why I made them. Why they seemed like the right ones at the time."

Robin sighed. It felt like a bitter pill to swallow.

"I love you, Robin," he said as if reading her mind. As if knowing that was the reaffirmation she needed, even if it felt wrong to ask for it. Of course her father loved her. That was one thing she never questioned. "You were in my thoughts every single day."

_Except you made no effort to be a part of my life. Instead you carved out a new life here in Africa. You created a new family for yourself. _

"Sandrine's baby...is it yours?" she asked.

Her father nodded. "Yes."

"You're married..." she said softly. "You have a new family. If I...if I hadn't fainted at the market and had seen you anyway...then, you're saying, I should've walked away. Ignored you. I mean, that's your logic right? The past and the present don't mix. I have no right to be part of your new family."

Robin saw him flinch. That one hurt. _Good. _

"No, luv. That's not true."

"I fell into your new life by accident," she added. "You're forced to make space for me now but..." She was crying now. Why did it all hurt so much all of a sudden? This wasn't what she'd felt yesterday. "I don't want you to have to do that."

Robin felt his arms around her.

"Sweetheart, you have no idea how happy it makes me to be in the same room as you..."

Robin pushed him away. She wasn't ready for this right now and she suddenly, childishly, wished her mother was here already. "Dad?"

He wiped away a tear from her cheek. Like he'd done when she fell and scraped her knees as a kid.

"What is it?"

"Can you leave me alone for a bit?"

Judging from the way his eyes darkened in response, she guessed that hurt him too. She tried to tell herself that she didn't care.

"Alright, luv. Whatever you need. But I'll be back later." He kissed her cheek and then pulled out a piece of paper and a pen from her bedside drawer. "This is my phone number. If you need to talk to me, call me. Anytime."

"Thanks," she mumbled after he left, knowing he couldn't hear her.

Robin wasn't sure how euphoria of discovering her father was alive yesterday had somehow given way to anger and frustration today.

_I'm so glad you're back Dad. But it makes me so angry to know that you never tried to find a way back to us. All these years..._

She sank back into her pillow as she wiped away the last of her tears, determined not to cry anymore.

_Enough of that. There are starving, homeless people fleeing the DRC who'd give an arm and a leg to trade places with me._

She wasn't an impressionable teenager anymore. Her innocence had died a long time ago, along with the first man she'd loved. She was an adult now. A doctor, capable of travelling to war zones and amputating someone's limbs on the spot.

Even the fact that she'd asked her mother to come here, bothered her now.

_I wanted you to see Dad face to face, like I did. Because in the back of my mind, I was picturing some kind of clichéd, romantic reunion between two of the people I love most in my life. But I was wrong. It's contrived and manipulative. _

Robin realized now that it was a mistake. She should have told her mother the truth over the phone and let her make the decision on her own. Instead her mother now worried over her health, while having no idea what exactly would await her once she landed in Kigali.

_I still love you, Dad. That's never going to change. No matter how angry I am. But if you want me to respect you again, you're going to have to earn it this time. You say you're grateful to have me back in your life, but lets face it, if I hadn't fallen face down at the market, I'd still think you were dead. _

Robin stared at the door, wondering when her father would walk back through it. Wondering what she'd say when he did.

It suddenly occurred to her that reconciling her gratitude with her disappointment might take more time than she thought.

_Vancouver, Canada_

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Alex picked up a toy train off the floor and put in on the shelf. It was a shiny silver Amtrak car and she stuck it next to a German, wooden locomotive, before taking another glance at her watch. It was getting dark outside already.

Ahmad had insisted she stay home another day and take it easy until tomorrow. Alex should've been grateful but instead she was restless.

Part of her wondered when the shock of what happened at the clinic last night would hit her. She expected to be wide awake all night, but instead she'd slept well. So well, that she hadn't heard her alarm and overslept by nearly two hours. When she did wake up she felt fine. Calm and well-rested. Even the soreness on her arm was only mildly annoying.

What did leave her edgy was the thought of the conversation she needed to have with Maria.

_You need to tell her. You can't put it off another day. It's a minor miracle that she hasn't mentioned anything as it is. But how do I tell the person who's been my rock the last two years that I can't pay her salary right now?_

_What in the world am I going to do if she leaves? _

_That _thought was more disturbing to her than anything else right now. Maria wasn't just a nanny. The woman had travelled from Scotland to Australia and now to Canada with her. She'd seen Alex through one of the worst years of her life and taught her how to be a mother. Liam_ loved_ her.

_Not just Liam. Me too. _

She'd have to find a way to convince her to stay. Begging and pleading were not out of the question.

_"Alejandra, no vas a trabajar hoy?" _

Alex nearly hit the bookshelf when she spun around. "Jesus Christ, when did you get in here?"

"Stop thinking so hard that you lose your hearing," the old woman chided her.

Maria looked at the rolled up sleeve on her bandaged arm. "_Que te paso_?" she asked with a frown.

_"Yo hago boxing con criminales." _

Maria cringed. "Your Spanish. _Por favor_. It hurts my ears, Alejandra."

The old woman put aside the laundry basket she was holding to examine her arm. "Tell me what happened..._en ingles."_

Alex sat down on the couch with her and explained to her what happened at the clinic the night before.

Maria gasped. "_Ay_! Go back to bed, I will make you something nice..."

Alex laughed. "I'm not sick, Maria! I got a few stitches, that's all."

"You lose blood," Maria shot back, her face dead serious now.

"Not any more then when I chop vegetables."

"It's not funny, Alejandra," Maria chided her. "I don't like you working in this clinic. What I will do if something happen to you? You have a young son that needs a mother! You are his only family, _mi hija_. Two years with you and I have never seen you with any family."

Alex looked at her guiltily. It wasn't true. She did have a family. A husband she still loved more than she had a right to. A son that she missed like crazy. A sister who made her feel whole. And two beautiful nieces that she adored. She'd deprived her son of all of them the last two years.

"You're right," she admitted. "I'll be more careful. Promise."

"Please," Maria repeated. "Not for me. For Liam."

"Maria...since you're here," Alex paused, taking a deep breath. "There's something else I need to tell you."

Maria's face was even more sombre when Alex hesitated, unable to get the words out.

"Tell me," she demanded.

"Maria...the last two years. You know, I didn't work," _How do I put this into words?_ "I had enough funds put aside that I could...but I...I shouldn't have waited _this_ long. It was stupid and careless and there's no excuse..."

"_Que dices_?"

"I'm saying...I can't pay you, right now. I'm hoping that with the job at the clinic and the research I'm helping this doctor in California with that next month..." Who was she kidding? Next month wasn't bloody likely either.

Maria looked like she was about to laugh. "That's it?"

"What do you mean?"

"I was afraid maybe you are sick or you are telling me we are moving again or that you are moving without me..."

"Move without you?" Alex raised her brows. "Maria...I'm trying to tell you I can't pay you right now. _At all_."

The old woman took one of Alex's hands into hers. "Can you pay for the rent and the food for us?"

"Yes...yes."

"Then it is okay."

"Maria...I know you send the money to your son, in Spain, that he's not working..."

"Alejandra..." Maria squeezed her hand. "_Mi hijo...murio_. My son is dead. He died three weeks before I went to Scotland and met you."

"_What_?" Alex looked at her in disbelief.

"My son he didn't have work for a long time. It was making him depressed. I try to help him...but when his wife, she...she left him, he could not accept this. One morning he went to the train station he stepped into the train when it came. He died right away."

Alex felt a lump in her throat. "Oh god...I'm so sorry." How was it possible that she didn't know? That this woman who'd taken care of her and Liam for the last two years had never told her? Even worse, Alex had never bothered to find out. She remembered wondering once why Maria never called her son in Spain. _Why the hell didn't you ask? _

"Maria...why didn't you tell me? Why did you tell me you were sending him money?"

"I do send him money. I send it to the cemetery to keep his grave nice. With fresh flowers."

Now Alex felt the bitter sting of tears. "I'm so sorry...I had no idea."

"Oh Alejandra," this time the old woman embraced her with a hug. "Please do not be sad. When my son died I was thinking maybe I should die too...that I have no reason to be here anymore. My husband is gone, my only child is dead...I feel so bad that I could not help my son. I knew then...that I have to leave Spain I could not be there any more. Every thing there reminds me of my son. When I was young, I always dream about Scotland, about the beautiful green hills and the blue lakes. So I went. But I didn't have much money, so I have to work, to do something but my English was not very good. I saw the place looking for nannies and I wanted to be with children. Because to me...children they are still happy."

Feeling the woman's arms around her suddenly made Alex realize the depth of the old woman's love for her. It made her regret that she hadn't let her show it before.

"So there I meet you and you reminded me so much of my son. You were sad and alone and you did not know how to help yourself. You were not ready to take care of a baby because you don't know how to take care of yourself. I will tell you now, the first day I saw you I wanted to tell you that I cannot work for you. That you remind me too much of my son! I could not help my son, Alejandra, so I was scared that I will make the same mistakes again."

"But you stayed..."

"I stayed for Liam. For this beautiful, happy little boy who makes me smile every day."

"I'm sorry..." Alex said softly. All this time she'd been so focused on getting back on her feet again she'd never even given a moment's thought to how her situation might have affected Maria.

"Stop it," Maria chided her. "You have no reason to be sorry. In the beginning, you remind me of my son, but I was wrong. You are different. Everything you did, even if you didn't know, you did for your son...you know you cannot take care of him so you hire me." She smiled. "Maybe you were_ loca_ but you always make very smart decisions."

Alex smiled. "Yeah...that was one of my better ones."

"My son, he never accepts that he had a problem. He never ask for help. It is a hard thing to do...but you did this, Alejandra. You ask for help, you took the medication to get out of it, you choose to keep fighting."

"I feel like I wore blinders for two years," she said quietly.

"_Que_?"

"I feel like I didn't see what was going on around me," she explained. "I should have. I should have been there for you too. Not just the other way around."

"You were sick," Maria corrected her. "You work hard to get better. That is all that matters. It makes me very happy."

"For two years all I did was take..."

Maria laughed. "_Ay carramba_..._por favor_ stop it. You gave me more than you can imagine. You gave me a family. You gave me a reason to be here again. You have no idea how much you help me. You and Liam."

The thought that maybe their relationship wasn't as one-sided as Alex used to think it was made her happy.

"So you'll stay?"

"Did you listen to anything I said?" Maria sighed. "For a smart woman you can be so dumb sometimes."

Alex laughed. "Thank you. You have no idea how much it means to me."

"You are welcome."

"What was his name?"

"_Quien_?"

"Your son."

Maria smiled. "Alejandro."

_Pine Valley, Pennsylvania, USA_

__

_

* * *

_

David Hayward had icing on his face and all over his hands when he heard the doorbell ring.

"One more..." Leah told him, moving her hand toward the bowl full of chocolate icing.

"Oh no..." David deftly moved her hand aside and placed the bowl onto a higher counter that she couldn't reach even when standing on a chair. "If we eat any more, we won't have any left for the brownies."

"_Pleeeeeeeeease_?"

Her icing-covered face was irresistible.

He put the bowl back down. Anna always chided him for giving in to her far too easily.

_"If you keep it up we are going to raise a spoiled brat. I won't have that. She has to learn that no means no. From both of us."_

David grinned when he saw his daughter's lips widen into a smile.

_How can I resist the most adorable three-year old on the planet? What father could?_

Besides, Anna wasn't here.

The doorbell rang again.

"Coming!"

He wiped his hands on his apron and dashed to the door.

"Can I help..." He didn't get a chance to finish his sentence. His cousin Maggie leapt up to give him a hug.

He returned her embrace. "Maggie?"

"David...it's _so_ nice to see you. You have no idea how long I've been on the road."

"Aren't you at college?" He eyed the giant back-pack she carried, nearly dwarfing her small frame.

She avoided his eyes. "Well...I was but. It's a long story...do you mind if I come in?"

Leah had left the kitchen and squealed when she saw Maggie. "Maggie! Come, I am making brownies!"

Maggie bent down to kiss Leah, while David took her bag.

He put his arms around her and led her into the living room. "Can I get you anything?"

She took off her jacket. "Yeah...a place to stay for a few days?"

David raised his eyebrows. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah...yeah, it's okay." She smiled a lop-sided smile. "It's okay except that I need a place to stay for a little while."

"You're staying here?" Leah reacted as if the news was an early Christmas present.

David used his hand to wipe away some of the icing from his daughter's chin. "As you can see...you're always welcome here."

"Is Anna at work?" Maggie asked.

"Anna's on the way to Africa," he told her. "To visit Robin."

Maggie smiled. "Well...that is perfect then. I need a place to stay, and you clearly need a babysitter."

David chuckled. Anna was right. He was completely incapable of saying no to any of the women in his life.

He decided he would get the whole story from his cousin after his afternoon baking session with Leah.

And when he watched Maggie scoop Leah up in her arms, he suddenly realized that maybe this was an unexpected opportunity.

He had the rest of the week off, and now, thanks to his cousin, he might be able to use one of those days to take a short trip of his own.


	10. Chapter 10

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**Chapter 10 **

_Leonardo Da Vinci- Fiumicino Airport, Rome, Italy _

_

* * *

_

"Are you kidding me?" Anna Devane looked at the handsome Italian man sitting behind the counter in disbelief. "There are no outgoing flights because there's a baggage handler strike?"

"_Si_. No flights can leave Rome at this moment."

"But my baggage is already on the plane...I don't need anyone unloading it!"

"_Signora_," he ennunciated slowly, as if she were five. "You are not the only person on this plane. There are new passengers flying from Rome to Entebbe."

Anna groaned. "When do you think the next flight might leave?"

"We don't know. Maybe tomorrow morning. Maybe late tonight even."

"Tomorrow morning?" Tomorrow morning was twenty-hours from now.

The man shrugged his well-built shoulders, looking as though he couldn't be any more indifferent to her predicament if he tried. "We hope tomorrow morning, _si_."

Anna glared at him. "You 'hope'? Really?" She moved closer to the counter, resisting the urge to bang her fist on it. "Do you have any other suggestions on how to get to Africa before then?"

He shrugged his shoulders a second time. "Take a train to Switzerland and fly from there?"

Anna looked at him in disbelief. "_Take a train to Switzerland_? Are you kidding me?"

"They are not striking," he offered.

Of course they weren't.

Anna remembered when there were strikes in Paris, her colleague Dan O'Toole would sometimes take a train to Basel and fly to London from there. Why _didn't_ the Swiss ever strike? Did living in paradise and having your pristine store shelves decked with chocolate and cheese mean you had nothing else to ask for?

"Come on..." she pleaded. "There _has_ to be a better alternative."

"Wait here until it is over. Then the flights will resume. There will be no ticket change fee."

"Fabulous."

Anna turned around and saw a line at least fifty people deep behind her. Most of them looked at least as irritated as she did, many of them considerably more so. She looked the counter agent and felt a twinge of sympathy.

_No wonder you can't muster any empathy. If you did you'd probably want to curl into a fetal position and weep. Just keep looking handsome and drinking espresso. Che sarà, sarà, right?_

Anna walked away from the counter, wondering when exactly her life had slipped out of her control.

She glanced around the terminal and noticed the masses of humanity surrounding her. Families and backpackers camped on the floor. Children sleeping on seats in the waiting areas. Massive line-ups at the ticket counters, pay phones and restrooms. Two elderly Italian men screaming at each other, arms waving in the air and finger gestures flying.

Two young women wearing headscarves, hugging each other, one of them in tears. The other one holding on to a toddler with one hand.

_Knowing I'm not the only one who's lost control still doesn't make me feel any better. _

Anna pulled out her Blackberry and tried to make a call back home, only mildly surprised to find out there was no service. Hence the lines by the pay phones. When all else failed, it was back to land lines.

Anna sighed. There was little she hated more than losing control over her own life.

She looked for an empty seat and gave up after walking through the entire terminal and finding none. She finally settled for spot on the floor next to a wall, leaning against it tiredly.

"What now?" she thought aloud, closing her eyes as she held on to the only baggage she was carrying around, a black, French leather purse that contained all her essentials including passport, papers, wallet, a Blackberry and half empty bottle of sparkling water. Her only other piece of luggage was still on the DC to Rome plane she'd arrived from not too long ago. Not that she really needed it. Nothing in it was irreplaceable and clothing and toiletries could always be bought. Besides, she was used to travelling light.

Her thoughts went back to a time when she'd come to Italy under very different circumstances. Travelling even lighter.

She remembered her yearning for adventure and for the adrenalin rush that came with the thrills of her new job. Her first assignment with Robert in the WSB.

They were in the south of France chased by someone. Anna smirked because she couldn't remember who or why anymore. But she remembered needing desperately to get away. That their lives depended on it.

That in order to evade them they went so far as to run into the Mediterranean and make a mad attempt to cross the border at sea, by swimming.

Fuelled by fear and adrenaline, they somehow made it across the border, swimming further than she thought they were capable of. When they arrived, exhausted and spent, at an Italian beach she remembered Robert's arms around her and feeling more alive than she ever felt before. The touch of his salty lips on hers was the most electrifying sensation she'd ever experienced. One she never wanted to end. It was a hunger unlike any other.

Anna smiled at the memory, wondering how it was possible that she could still distinctly remember the feel of his skin against hers when there were so many blank slates in her memories.

She knew then that she wanted to spend the rest of her life like that. In his arms, the two of them, against the world.

What a life it was, she thought. One in which she equated fear and danger with excitement. Sure, that life had shaped her and made her strong. Given her skills she wouldn't have otherwise. But it had come close to destroying her too.

_In the end it did destroy the man I loved. Literally. _

It was her youthful penchant for flirting with danger that led her to Cesar Faison. An alliance she made on a reckless whim.

One that she would spend the rest of her life regretting.

_I lost ten years of my life. Alex was kidnapped. And Robert died. All because of my connection to Faison. _

Even now, the guilt was there. Every single day.

Anna shivered and buttoned up her jacket. She suddenly felt cold in the terminal's air conditioning.

The old Anna Devane would have stormed out of the terminal and searched for a train to Switzerland. Taking action had always been her preferred method of solving a problem.

Today's Anna Devane still hated waiting. With a passion. But she could acknowledge that maybe right now, it was the better solution. The counter agent did say the strike could end as early as tonight.

She stared into the crowded terminal, wondering what Robert would have done.

_We'd have made the decision together. _

Robert had an overprotective streak too, but he always had faith in her abilities. Maybe therein was the difference between him and David.

Anna yawned, wondering why she was thinking of him. The airport terminal at Fiumicino didn't have much in common with the sun swept beach of her memories. Or of the unforgettable wedding that followed.

They were two different Italys. Two different worlds.

You can't go back into the past, Anna knew. Even if you were incapable of letting it go.

_King Faisal Hospital, Kigali, Rwanda_

__

_

* * *

_

Robin finished buttoning her shirt and looked at herself in the mirror, cringing at what she saw. Between the circles under her eyes and the messy hair that was in need of a long shower, she looked about as good as she'd felt the last few days. That and she knew she could stand to gain a few pounds again.

Robin brushed a strand of hair behind her ears, grateful that the two doctors who'd seen her earlier agreed that as long as she stayed put for a few days, she could just as well do it in her hotel room as here in this hospital.

_If I stay here any longer I'm going to look even worse. _

The hotel room that was awaiting her was small and modest, a popular spot for international relief workers travelling on a budget, but it had a bed and a private bathroom and a 'do not disturb' sign. The three combined sounded like paradise to her just now.

'I should call Dad and tell him I was released,' she thought, before reaching for the phone to call a taxi.

She started looking for the piece of paper with his phone number on it, then decided to hell with it.

_Two days ago I thought he was dead. Now I'm supposed to let him know my every move? _

She was about to call a taxi when she heard a knock on the door.

"Come in." She knew before he came in that it wasn't a repeat visit from the doctor. Doctors didn't knock.

"Hi, luv."

Robin still got goose bumps when she heard his voice.

"Hi, Dad."

"I heard you were released."

Robin raised her brows. "Keeping tabs on me already?"

"No...the hospital called, since I'm the one who admitted you and paid for the bill."

Robin blushed. "Sorry."

He smiled. "It's okay. I_ am_ keeping tabs on you already too."

"I'm going back to the hotel."

"Any chance I can convince you to stay with us instead? Sandrine and I made the guest room ready for you and..."

"Dad," Robin cut him off. He looked so hopeful and genuine it took all her willpower to stick to her guns. It would have been so easy to let him take care of her. Too easy. "I can't...I'm sorry. I need some time to think. By myself. And Mom's coming here. I can't really ask her to come meet me at your house, can I?"

"We can find a way to work that out..."

"Dad," she insisted. "I made my decision."

He looked both disappointed and concerned. "Robin, there's something else."

Robin sat down on the bed. "What?"

"Now that you know I'm alive, it means I broke the deal."

"What?" she looked at him, not understanding.

"The deal I made with Faison. "

Robin stared at him in disbelief. "Are you kidding me? Do you really think he's trailing you on Google Earth or something and watching our every move? Mom hasn't heard from him in two years! For all we know the guy is dead!"

Her father's easy smile was gone, his blue eyes dead serious. "Two years ago he gave your sister a deadly virus and tried to kidnap your mother. Don't tell me you've forgotten that already."

Robin threw her arms up. "We're in Kigali for god's sake. Faison's not some omnipresent god watching our every move."

Her father put his hands on her shoulders, as if willing her to see the seriousness of it all. "Robin, the deal was that I would stay away from you or he'd kill you. I've kept that until two days ago. All bets are off now. That puts you in considerable danger."

"Don't you think that going off to rescue Mom, even if it turned out it wasn't Mom... from his clutches in Russia was enough of a deal breaker?"

Her Dad chuckled. "You'd think. But then the guy doesn't exactly think the way you and I do."

Robin knew exactly where this was headed and she felt her cheeks flush with heated indignation at the thought. "So what are you going to do? Put me under a 24-hour guard? You've got to be kidding."

"I think, luv," he said softly. "If he hasn't found out already, then Faison will find out sooner rather than later. He's not omnipotent, but he has a world of connections. I'm not that naive to think he doesn't have any in the WSB."

"This is not fair, Dad..." she shot back. "You're trying to freak me out into staying with you."

He raised his hand in denial. "No, luv. If you want to stay at a hotel, that's fine. I understand. But I will put a guard on you. I won't risk not doing that, no matter how much you protest."

Robin stopped just short of sighing. Part of her wanted to bang her head into a wall. It was like her childhood all over again. Maybe if she wasn't so damn tired she'd put up more of a fight.

"What hotel are you staying at?" he asked softly.

"The Okapi," she told him.

"The Okapi? Robin, that's a dump!"

"It's fine, Dad! It was fine before and it'll be fine again!"

"It's old and dirty and noisy. Sweetheart, you're supposed to be recovering and resting. If you'd like a hotel...let me choose something else for you. A place where you'll actually be able to get some sleep, in a bed that's not about to fall apart. There might not be a Ritz or even a Marriott in Kigali, but the Serena is nice. So is the Mille Collines."

This time she did sigh. _This_ battle wasn't worth it. "Fine. Pick something else. Whatever you want."

He smiled a triumphant smile. "I like the Serena...it's as close to a resort as you'll find here."

Her bedside phone rang before he could finish his sentence. Robin picked it up.

"Mom?"

Robin stared at her father as she heard her mother's voice on the other end. His smile vanished along with some of the colour in his face.

Part of her wanted to press the receiver to her father's lips, forcing him to say something.

Not that she really had it in her to be that cruel. To either of them.

"You're stuck where_? Rome?"_

Her mother sounded almost as tired and exasperated as Robin felt. It made her regret asking her to come here all over again.

"I'm okay, Mom. Really. I've been released and I'm going to go back to the hotel to take it easy for a couple of days. Which hotel?" Robin put her hand over the receiver and looked at her father. "I don't know. Which hotel _am_ I going to?"

"The Serena Kigali," he mouthed.

Robin repeated the name to her mother and assured her for a second time she was okay. "Mom...if this strike goes on, there's no need for you to come here. I'll be okay. I overreacted..." But her mother wouldn't have any of it. She said something along the lines of swimming here if need be, making Robin laugh. "Rwanda's not exactly on the other side of the Mediterranean, Mom."

She hung up, feeling better somehow. Her mother had that effect on her.

"When will she be here?" her father asked.

"Not sure," Robin told him. "Apparently there's some baggage handler's strike in Rome. No flights at least until tomorrow."

"I see."

"Are you angry that I asked her to come?"

Her father debated the question, then shook his head. "No, luv."

"Do you want to see her?" Robin pressed.

"Do I want to see her?" His smile returned. "Yes...I do. You have no idea how much...how much I've missed your mother."

It wasn't the answer she was expecting.

"Don't get me wrong," he added. "I'm not expecting a heartfelt reunion and I'm terrified of the possible consequences, but now there's no going back and there's a part of me that cannot wait to see her again."

Robin bit her lip. Again his answer took her by surprise. "What about Sandrine? How does she feel about it?"

"She wanted me to tell you two years ago. It's not the best timing now," he agreed. "She's about to give birth. The last thing I want is to bring any stress into her life. But she's wanted me to end the lies a long time ago. Sandrine likes to tackle things head on. Kind of like your Mom."

"When is she due?"

"Less than a month." Sitting next to her he put his hand on hers. "I'd love it if you were still here then. It's your half sister too, luv."

Robin didn't even want to think that far ahead. "You know you're having a girl?"

Her father smiled a lop-sided smile. "No...in fact, Sandi insists it's a boy. But you know, I'm always right."

Robin couldn't help a smile. "Right. Hope you don't have any money on it."

He held out his hand. "Come. You're tired, sweetheart. Let me drive you to the hotel."

"I was going to call a taxi..." she tried.

"Not a chance. You're stuck with this driver."

"So you can keep an eye on me," she sighed.

"No at all," he shot back, nudging her towards the door. "I have more selfish reasons. Like wanting your company for an extra thirty minutes."

_Vancouver, Canada _

__

_

* * *

_

"Yes, I need one with a GPS," David Hayward re-iterated to the young Asian man behind the car rental counter. "It doesn't matter if it costs extra."

He was terrible with directions and maps. Not that he'd ever admit it. Anna on the other hand, had an innate sense of direction. She could look at a map once and then casually direct him the rest of the way. The fancy GPS he bought for his own car was usually left turned off when they drove somewhere new together.

He signed the rental contract and grabbed the car keys, hoping he wouldn't get lost on the way to the airport garage.

Luckily the company he chose with kept their cars closest to the entrance. David found the red Matrix with the license plate matching the one on his plastic key chain and got into it.

He pulled out the address he'd written down on a piece of paper from his pocket and plugged it into the GPS.

And then he sank back into his car seat and ran a hand through his thick, dark hair, staring out of the window.

"What the hell am I doing here?"

He wanted to personally check the address that the Seaview IT tech had given him based on the ISP address he'd pulled from Alexia Merrick's e-mail, almost as soon as he got it.

But then Robin got ill and Anna left for Africa, and it all suddenly took a back seat. That is, until Maggie showed up at his house, just as he'd taken time off to look after Leah.

Maggie who told him that she decided to take a semester off to avoid burn out. That is, until he had a couple of glasses of wine with her after dinner and she admitted she was reeling from a break-up and couldn't bear to share a half dozen classes with her ex.

He'd forced himself not to lecture her just then, although it took considerable effort. In the end he did manage to get her to swear to him on no uncertain terms that she'd go back next semester, or he'd drag her back himself.

He pulled out his cell phone to give her a call.

"Hello." Maggie's perky voice answered on the second ring.

"Hi sweetheart. How's my princess doing?"

"I'm good. You?"

David chuckled. "How about my_ other_ princess?"

"Leah's good too. We're reading a book."

"Oh yeah...what book?"

"Something about birds and bees."

"_Maggie_!"

His cousin laughed at the other end. "She's gotta learn sometime."

"Maggie, she's three!" Not that Leah was going to date before the age of twenty-five anyway.

"Tintin. It's a weird looking French cartoon that she likes."

"Belgian."

"What?"

"He's Belgian. The cartoon. Robin got the books for her in Paris."

Maggie laughed again. "If this is your argument for a higher education..."

"Maggie...how is she otherwise. Is everything okay?"

"She's fine! Happy, healthy, eating, reading, wearing clothes...and we even fed the guinea pig! What's his name again? Pastrami?"

"Funny. Ruben."

"Oh and the cabin is still standing."

"Okay, okay...got it."

"Have a good time in Canada, doing whatever mysterious thing you refuse to tell me about. Even after I confessed all my sordid heartbreak to you."

David couldn't help a smile. Maggie could be so dramatic. "Give her a big kiss for me, alright? And thank you."

"I will. Don't thank me. Just remember to bring me back the maple butter I asked for. It's hard to get here."

Dramatic_ and_ demanding. They were definitely related.

The smile left his face after he ended the call.

"Now we get down to business."

He turned on the motor and started driving, following the directions of the monotone female voice as she guided him out of the airport and into the city of Vancouver.

David had been here once before, years ago, during a medical conference and certain recollections came back to him now. He hadn't spent much time outside of convention rooms, but from what he did remember the city reminded him of Seattle. There was a lot of rain and a lot of lush, green woods. There has also been an afternoon excursion to a giant suspension bridge that left him queasy.

When he left the airport, the global positioning system told him that it would take him just over thirty minutes to get to his destination and, now, as the screen told him he was nearly there, he started taking in the neighbourhood around him.

A bunch of teenage boys in oversize hoodies, jeans and headbands congregated at an intersection he stopped at. They all stared him down and one of them gave him the middle finger as he drove by.

He spotted an aging public school building where a couple of girls were playing basketball, in a concrete lot, using a hoop with no net.

Even though Vancouver was a noticeably green city, there was little vegetation in this neighbourhood. What there was, was a lot of concrete and a lot of grey. In the form of empty lots and modest row houses.

It wasn't exactly the ghetto but it was definitely and unmistakeably a low income area.

He wasn't about to find a manicured lawn or a multi-car garage here.

According to the GPS he was within a block of where he needed to be and for the first time since leaving Pine Valley at the crack of dawn, he felt uneasy.

_How do you go from a castle in Europe to this, Alex? _

He was starting to doubt everything.

"I've made a mistake..." he realized aloud. In his eagerness to possibly track down Alex, he hadn't considered the implausibility of it all.

Just because a woman whose name sounds like Alex's is doing similar stem cell research didn't mean they were the same person. Alexia Merrick was probably a Canadian scientist.

'A struggling one,' he thought with a lop-sided smile.

He took a look at the small, two-storey town home to the right of his car. It matched the address on his GPS. This was it.

Part of him didn't even want to get out of the car. That's how futile it all felt. It was raining now too. A light, uninviting, drizzle.

It made _no_ sense for Alex to be living here, in this bleak neighbourhood in complete anonymity, publishing insignificant research articles in third rate journals.

_Unless... _

David's thoughts went back to one of Edmund Grey's famous Crystal Balls. Both he and Alex had been there that night, and his most vivid memory was Alex pushing him down a flight of stairs, thinking he was someone else. She could have killed him and he'd have been well in his rights to press charges.

The truth was that Alex had a known history of mental instability.

Thanks to Erica Kane digging around in her past, David knew Alex had once been institutionalized in her native Wales. _That_ fact was something that neither Sean, Anna or Robin ever brought up in their current search for her. It was something they conveniently liked to ignore, or even deny.

If Alex was mentally unstable again, then maybe there _was_ no rhyme or reason for what she was doing.

David parked on the street, a couple of doors down from her address.

_Do I just walk up to the door and knock? And if she's not there, what do I say? 'Sorry...wrong address?' _

David cringed. He really should have thought this through. He had ample time on the flight here.

_What if, by some miracle she is there? What do I say then? "Oh hi Alex. Did you know we've been looking for you for over two years?"_

He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he barely noticed a woman walking up to the door of the town home in question.

She wore a black windbreaker with the hood over her head, so he couldn't see her face from the car. But her frame was identical to Anna's and he thought he spotted strands of long, dark brown hair peaking out from underneath the hood. She carried herself with the exact same casual elegance that Anna did.

_Was it really possible? _

David's heart skipped a beat and he hurriedly pushed open the car door and jumped outside towards her.

She had already opened the door of the town house, when he ran up behind her.

She turned around with lightning speed when she heard him approach, making the jacket hood fall off.

David wasn't sure who was more shocked when their eyes met. Him or her.

_"Alex?" _

_

* * *

_

As always big thanks to my two awesome editors, Annie and Kel, who keep my rambling and my typos to a minimum! :)


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11 **

_Vancouver, Canada_

_

* * *

_

_"Alex?" _

David Hayward repeated her name. Not that it should have been in the form of a question. There was no doubt that the woman standing in front of him, on this rainy afternoon in Vancouver, was Anna's twin sister.

Her reaction to seeing him was one of such obvious shock and fear, that for a moment David thought she was going to make a run for it. He got ready to grab her arm, not sure if he was up for a chase through a foreign neighbourhood.

"Alex," he repeated. "You remember me don't you?"

The colour of her skin had turned several shades paler, in sharp contrast to her long, dark hair. She was white as a ghost.

"Yeah..." she answered, although he could barely hear her voice.

"Alex, I..."

He was interrupted by a little, dark-haired boy running to the door, clutching a toy train in his hand. He looked maybe a year younger than Leah and he had big, beautiful, curious eyes.

"Mommy!"

David raised his eyebrows. '_Mommy?'._

Alex closed the door with shaking hands and turned back to David. "What are you doing here? Are you here alone?"

He nodded. "Yes, it's just me...I..." He regretted his words almost as soon as he said them. If Alex was mentally unstable and she didn't want to be found, there was no telling what she'd do to keep it that way.

'Stop it, you're being ridiculous,' he chided himself. 'Just because she once hated your guts, doesn't mean she's going to kill you.'

"How did you find me here?" she demanded, her face slowly losing its pallor.

His own shock was now giving way to irritation. It was an oddly familiar sensation, reminding him of past encounters with Alexandra Devane. "Look, Alex...it's raining." He was starting to get wet. "Can I come in?"

She looked as though she considered the idea. Then shook her head. "No."

"Alex!" He was exasperated already. He'd forgotten her ability to have that effect on him. "_We've been looking for you for over two years!_ Do you have any idea how hard it's been for Anna, not knowing whether you're dead or alive? Now I find out that you're alive and well and living in Canada. Don't you think you owe us some sort of explanation as to why the hell you fell off the face of the Earth for all this time?"

Her features softened and he finally saw something other than shock written on her face. "I never meant to hurt my sister. Or anyone I love."

"What you meant...that doesn't matter."

"I know," she acknowledged.

David figured that was as close to an apology he was going to get.

"Alex, I don't know what you're thinking right now, but I want you to know that I don't want to hurt you. If you tell me there's a reason we can't know you're here, then I understand and I'll do whatever it takes to make sure you're safe. But I have so many damn questions for you," David pressed. "We _all_ do."

"How did you find me?" she insisted.

They were still standing on her doorstep. David had given up trying not to get wet. Alex hadn't bothered to put her hood back on either, but she seemed oblivious to the rain. Clearly he wasn't going to get anywhere until he answered at least that one question.

He explained to her how Robin had found the article in the medical journal. How he'd enlisted Levy Rosenberg to contact her against the researcher's will. And then gotten his IT tech to track down her address via her server, and decided on a whim to fly here and check it out.

"Here I thought I hid my tracks so well," she mumbled. "I even checked out Rosenberg."

"Levy's very legit and for what it's worth...it's probably a one in a million chance that Robin spotted that article and made the connection she did."

"So you came here...not Anna?" she asked.

"I'll explain it all...but not here, Alex." It was time to put his foot down. "Not here out in the rain."

"Fine," she finally relented. "There's a coffee shop two blocks down. Give me one minute." She stepped into the house, giving him no invitation to do the same.

David shook his head in disbelief.

_Hospitable as always, Alex. _

He caught another glimpse of the little boy he'd seen earlier, when she opened the door. Obviously he'd been waiting patiently behind the door for Alex to come in. Again he stared at David with big, dark curious eyes. He looked so much like Alex, he didn't need to call her Mommy for David to make the connection.

_So you have a son. That's the last thing I would have expected. The question now is, who's the Dad? If it's Dimitri does that mean he knows Alex is here? Is that why you won't let me in...because Dimitri Marick in hiding in there, in the broom closet underneath the stairs? _

David wouldn't put it past the Count to keep Alex's whereabouts a secret from Anna. His dislike for her had become painfully obvious during Alex's kidnapping.

Not that any of_ that_, made any sense. Why would the wealthy Hungarian hide his wife and son at the other ends of the Earth? In a gloomy, working class neighbourhood to boot?

David suddenly remembered something else. A night time conversation he had with Anna in Moscow over two years ago, after Alex's kidnapping ordeal.

_"There's something else…while Faison still believed that Alex was me, she made an effort to gain his trust. She…" Anna had a hard time getting the words out. "She slept with him, David. At least that's what she told me…I don't know if it's true that he didn't force himself on her. I don't know whether that's my sister's way of regaining control of something she really had no control over…but on top of everything else…on top of the physical and the psychological nightmare she's going through, Alex feels this __guilt__ for sleeping with another man!"_

_"Dimitri will understand…" David had tried._

_"Alex doesn't necessarily think so," Anna cut him off, crying. "She's not even sure she wants his forgiveness. Not if it comes at the cost...of having him do something only because he feels he should."_

_"God, what a mess…" David had mumbled, almost regretting then, that he'd asked her for the truth behind her distress. _

_"This morning, Alex asked me to help her."_

_"__Help__ her?"_

_"She wants my help to get away from Dimitri and Andrei."_

_"I don't understand…"_

_"Alex says she needs time on her own to figure things out. I have the means to make sure she could go somewhere where he wouldn't be able to find her. Alex knows that and that's why she asked for my help."_

Except, David thought, Alex knew something else then too. She knew she was pregnant.

Had they taken any blood tests at the hospital in Moscow, which they would have, they would have informed her.

_But you didn't tell anyone. Not even Anna. _

Another realization hit him as Anna's words ran through his mind again. _"She slept with him, David."_

It all made sense now.

_You didn't tell anyone because you knew then the baby wasn't Dimitri's. Oh, Alex..._

David heard voices from behind the door. Another woman's voice, just before Alex stepped back outside and motioned to tell him she was ready.

"Can we drive to this coffee shop?" he asked.

She shook her head. "It's not far."

_Maybe I was wrong. She is going to kill me. _

Alex didn't bother with small talk as she walked beside him in the rain. Nor did she bother to put up the hood on her jacket, or offer him an umbrella. Maybe she was too busy concocting some sort of story for him.

Or maybe she really was insane.

She was right about the coffee shop being close by. They were there in less than five minutes.

He opened the door for her, rubbing his hands together when they got in. It was small and cosy, with a marble counter selling pastries at one end and there were small tables and a well-worn couch at the other. There was even a fireplace lit near the couch. Considering it was almost summer, the sight made him chuckle.

"Can I get you something?" he asked.

"Something warm, please," she replied. A drop of rain ran down the side of her face as she took off her jacket.

_It would kill you to give me a straight answer, wouldn't it?_

Alex looked at him as though she read his mind. "Coffee's fine. Milk, no sugar."

David's cheeks flushed. Alex had a way of doing that. A way of looking at him as though she was reading his thoughts, while at the same time, he couldn't even gauge hers, never mind read them.

Anna and Alex were like fire and ice. Anna could convey half a dozen emotions with one glance. One look from Alex, on the other hand, made him want to _ask_ a half dozen questions.

He ordered two coffees at the counter, realizing then that he was starving too. Airlines didn't toss so much as a pocket-sized bag of stale peanuts in your direction these days, even when they flew you across the country. He saw a carrot cake that looked appetizing and got two slices of that as well.

He already felt warmer by the time he joined Alex at a corner table, next to the fireplace.

She took the coffee gratefully, cupping the mug in her hands, while he dug his fork into the cake. She watched him in silence as he hungrily ate a few bites.

He wondered what she was planning on telling him. How much of it would be the truth. For what it was worth; physically she looked good. Healthy. And lucid, as she stared at him with those intelligent eyes of hers.

_Why not confront her from the start? Before she has a chance to concoct something? _

David took a sip of coffee. "The little boy at the house. He's your son, isn't he?"

"Yes," Alex answered.

"Is he Faison's son too?"

The question came out of left field. Just as he planned. And it made her grip her coffee cup so tightly, it whitened her fingers. Then she turned away, unable to meet his eyes this time. Both ambushed and embarrassed.

Her unexpected reaction made him feel like a heel.

_What made you so damn sure she was going to tell you a bunch of lies? Why are you always so prepared to think the worst of Alex Devane? Just because you had a professional rivalry with her nearly two decades ago? A time during which you can now freely admit you were a certified jerk. _

"Anna told you," was all she said after a long moment of silence.

"Anna hasn't told anyone else what happened with you and Faison," he wanted her to know. "But she needed to confide in someone that night in Moscow. She was so torn on whether to help you or not."

"It's alright," she said softly. "And to answer your question, yes he is. Faison's son."

"It's why you left Moscow, isn't it?" he added. Of course it was. Knowing she was carrying the child of the monster who'd just branded her, had to have killed her.

The truth was already breaking his heart, he wasn't sure he had the stomach for more.

"I left Moscow because I was a mess. Because I didn't know what to do, and when I decided what to do, I couldn't go through with it."

"What do you mean?"

"I decided to have an abortion after I found out. I went to three different clinics in England but couldn't go through with it at any of them."

Her voice was level and her eyes met his again. She'd rather have a tooth pulled than tell him this, that much he could tell and part of him still thought she looked edgy enough that she might flee at any minute. But it seemed like she decided to give him what he wanted. Part of him wanted to tell her she didn't need to. _I'm not the one who should be hearing this. Much as I don't like him, it should be Dimitri Marick sitting here._

But he didn't come this far to get half truths and half answers, even as his annoyance with Alex was slowly replaced with something kinder.

"So you had the baby," he coaxed.

She nodded. "I got rid of Dan O'Toole first. Anna had him keep an eye on me after helping me get out of Moscow. It was her way of keeping tabs on me. But the pregnancy was going to show soon. So, in the middle of the night I took off and headed for Glasgow."

"Just like that?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "He wasn't expecting it, so maybe it was easier than it would have been if he had."

David bit back a smile. _That _was classic Alexandra Devane. The one who'd be unable to hide her annoyance when he questioned her abilities. Maybe she wasn't as good at grandstanding as he was and maybe her arrogance was subtler than his, but she had just as much faith in her god-given genius as David had in his. She wouldn't have gone as far in her field if she didn't.

Alex was one of the smartest people he'd met in his lifetime. Of course she be able to outwit an Interpol agent, was what she was inferring.

"Then you created a whole new identity for yourself. That couldn't have been that easy."

"A slightly different identity," she corrected him. "I inadvertently picked up a few tips from O'Toole. For what it's worth, once you have one piece of respectable fake ID it's not that hard to make new ones. You use that to make new, authentic ones. You say there was an accidental spelling error, that Marick really should have been Merrick; a common name in England. I was told you had to pick a name close to your own, so that I'd answer if someone called it. I paid one of O'Toole's contacts to help me get a fake passport and to keep quiet about it." She paused. "Plus, in the first few months, needing ID to get around wasn't much of an issue. I didn't leave my apartment much." Again she couldn't quite meet his eyes.

One thing she didn't do well was lie.

_I'm going to guess that's an understatement. That and I'm also guessing you had post-traumatic stress disorder. Big time._ _It probably segued into clinical depression. _

"But you had pre-natal care at some point?"

"I went to the hospital when my water broke."

David's hand went to his mouth in shock. "Jesus Christ, Alex! _None?_ Just think of the possible complications...as a physician you had to have..."

"Look..." She cut him off. "I wasn't thinking too clearly at that point."

"But the baby was alright?"

"Through some miracle the baby was okay, yes." She paused. "I still hadn't planned on keeping him even then, but once I held him in my arms those plans changed too."

_So there you were. A complete mess and completely alone. With a newborn baby on top of it. _

David winced just thinking about it.

"I realized that if I was going to keep the child, that I had to make efforts to get well and to keep him safe because if Faison found out about him...then he wouldn't be. Safe, that is."

"So you decided if no one knew where you were, no one would know about the boy, is that it?"

Alex took another sip of coffee. "Something like that."

"So you've been here all this time, in Vancouver?"

"No. "I went from Glasgow to Australia. Stayed there for just over a year and I've been in Vancouver for just a few months. It's something else O'Toole taught me. If you want to stay invisible, never stay in one place too long."

David didn't know what to say. Part of it made sense, part of it was sheer madness. "Alex...it's crazy. What kind of an existence is that? You have family that loves you...that needs to know you're okay. They can protect you and your son. With Dimitri's money...and Anna's connections surely there are ways..."

"Don't you get it?" Alex furrowed her brows, cutting him off again. "If Faison knows about him there _is_ no way to keep him safe. He'll just keep trying and trying until he finds a way to get him. You of all people should know what he's capable of. Look what he did to _your _daughter."

David frowned. Two years ago Faison had injected Leah with a lethal virus, knowing he had the cure on hand. Knowing he'd dangle the carrot in front of Anna, using it as a means to coerce her into meeting with him.

Except Anna had been too ill to do much of anything, on that awful night in Paris. It was Alex who stood in for her hoping to help Leah before Faison found out he was meeting with the wrong twin.

"Alex..." It suddenly occurred to David that there was something he'd forgotten. Something that really should have been the very first thing he said today. "I never had the chance to thank you, for what you did that night in Paris. What you did...it took a lot of guts and it saved Leah's life."

_And it nearly cost you yours._

"You don't have to thank me for that. I wasn't trying to do something... heroic. We were running out of options that night, and if that's what saved Leah, then I'm glad. Really glad. I would do it again, no regrets."

"I owe you."

"You don't."

"Alex, for god's sake, would you accept my gratitude...just one damn time?"

"It is kind of rare, isn't it? Your gratitude." She smiled, reminding him of Anna in the process. She had a smile that was just as warm and beautiful and it took him by surprise.

_Because I don't usually see it when you're around me. _

"You're right. I _should_ milk this. Tell your friend Levy he needs to pay me a consultation fee if he wants to keep picking my brains. Convince him that Alexia Merrick is worth it."

David laughed. "I don't think you need _me_ to convince him of that."

"And this...David, really, carrots?" She pointed to the uneaten carrot cake on her side of the table. "Do me a favour and exchange this for something made with chocolate."

He chuckled. "Serious?"

"Yes."

He chuckled. "I don't think they'll take it back." He reached for her plate. "But I'll eat yours and get you the chocolate."

_Leonardo Da Vinci -Fiumicino Airport, Rome _

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_

* * *

_

If Anna thought she'd reached the end of her ropes twelve hours ago, she was wrong, because now was when she knew it with certainty.

She was sitting on the floor of Terminal 3, next to a Greek couple that was fast asleep, using their coats as pillows. They'd shared Athenian pastries with her earlier, but now both of them had given in to exhaustion and Nilos, the male half, was snoring loudly.

An entire day had come and gone and not a single flight had left Italy's biggest airport.

Initially, Anna debated another trip to the Alitalia ticket counter, if only to alleviate her frustration. But now she was thinking that course of action would probably have the opposite effect.

It was time to give up hope that anything would still happen today. One glance at the departures board and all she could see was line after line of '_volo cancellato'_ written in angry red.

Anna leaned against the wall, pressing two fingers against her temple. Her head was pounding now too. She wasn't sure whether it was because of exhaustion, frustration or jet lag. Or all three combined.

The migraines she got since the tanker explosion were just one more thing to thank Faison for. One more thing that was no longer under her control.

Anna used to be able to jet across an ocean or chase down an adversary knowing she'd be no worse for wear afterwards. She'd always been strong enough and healthy enough to be able to handle the physical demands of her job. Now there were physical limitations that she hated. David liked to remind her that they made her life worse because of her stubbornness.

_"Your headaches get so bad because you won't slow down when you get them. You have no respect for them and you should before they kill you," he'd lectured her one afternoon, with a frustrated look of concern, when the pain had been so bad she thought she couldn't stand it anymore. _

Respecting her new limitations felt like raising a white flag, and she was neither willing nor ready for that yet. It would be like conceding yet another battle to Cesar Faison.

Whether or not he knew it was beside the point.

Anna decided she'd rather pay the consequences. Besides, contrary to David's concerns, she knew that physically she was much better off than she was a few years ago, when she was still living in the middle of nowhere in Canada. Back then the headaches had often come with fevers and seizures. If migraines were the only fall-out from the tanker injury she had to worry about now, then she'd already come a long way. She sometimes had to remind herself how lucky she was.

She reached into her purse and pulled out a container of the prescription medication her doctor had given her. She swallowed one of the pills with the last sips of her Italian bottled water.

"There's a concession for you, David..." she mumbled aloud, taking another glance around the terminal. Weary travellers were littered everywhere. Young and old. Families with blankets on the floor and businessmen clutching to their laptop bags while asleep. It was late in the day and most had given up venting their frustrations at this point.

Anna suspected that many of them didn't have the means to get up and leave for the night. But she did and it was pointless not to make use of it.

The truth was she desperately needed a night's sleep in a dark room. Robin needed her to be functional if and when she finally got to Rwanda. And she could really do with a change of clothes and a hot shower.

Anna picked up her purse, straightened her wrinkled jacket and went to look for an exit, and then a taxi.

_Vancouver, Canada _

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_

* * *

_

Alex thanked him when David brought back the chocolate cake, along with two more cups of coffee. One for each of them.

"So, tell me," she asked. "After tracking down my address, why is it that you're here instead of my sister?"

"When Robin first found your article she didn't want me to tell Anna about it," he explained. "Not until we were sure that it really might be you."

"Why?"

"After you disappeared, Anna put a lot of the blame for what happened on herself. And with it she put a lot of pressure on herself to try and find you. To try and make things right."

"I'm sorry..." she said. "Anna had nothing to do with what happened at Alexei Estate with Faison. I alone made the decision to go on that bridge that night. I'm the one who set the events in motion, not Anna. She has to know that."

David shrugged his shoulders. "No one's harder on Anna than Anna. _You_ know that. She was running on fumes when she got hit by a car a few months ago, trying to follow some lead she thought she had on you."

Alex looked shocked. "Is she...?"

"She's fine now. But it made Robin think that maybe it wasn't a good idea to get her hopes up again over what might turn out to be nothing."

"So she doesn't know?"

David cringed and explained what happened two days ago. "She does now. But something came up with Robin and she's gone to Rwanda to see her."

"She's alright?"

"We hope so. She had a setback because she couldn't take her meds properly in her surroundings."

Alex put down her fork and looked at him as though she wanted to ask him a million questions. "I wish..."

"You wish you could talk to her," David finished for her. "Be there for her."

Alex's cheeks blushed red.

"She'd love it. She's always adored you."

"I loved the time I spent with her in Paris, and Hungary, she means the world..."

David looked at her and shook his head in disbelief of it all. "Alex, there's got to be way out of this! I can't just leave Vancouver and pretend I never saw you. What about Dimitri and Andrei? Do they have _any_ idea? _Don't you miss them?"_

Alex took a sip of coffee and didn't answer.

_Because you know you're a lousy liar. _

The fact that her eyes moistened and she wiped away a tear with the back of her hand was all the answer he needed. He never thought he'd feel the urge to put his arms around Alexandra Devane, but he did now. Not that she'd let him.

"Is Faison really still a threat?" he asked, gentler this time. "I know Anna tries to keep track of him and as far as I know he's disappeared from the face of the Earth much like you did."

"He's in Asia last time I saw his name in print. Apparently he bought an import-export company in China a year ago. He also attended a big race in Hong Kong a few months ago. That's about all I've found. He's very good at laying low but he is still around. Getting away with everything, as usual."

_Of course Alex would've tried to keep tabs on him. _"But after everything he did to you...couldn't you accuse him of kidnapping and assault...have him tried...?"

Alex raised her brows. "Tell me you're not that naive? Even if it got as far as charging him...I don't even know what nationality he is. Belgian? Dutch? Danish? French? Would they extradite him based on accusation from a British national for crimes he committed in France and...Russia? Not bloody likely."

She had a point, David thought. Even Anna had given up trying to bring him to justice legally a long time ago.

However, there was something else nagging at the back of his mind now. "Alex...you said you didn't have any prenatal care. In other words, you had no idea of the exact due date and you were with Faison for what, less than three weeks? Isn't there a chance the boy could be... Dimitri's? I mean, have you _had_ a DNA test?"

Alex stared at him. "A DNA test? No."

David almost choked. "_Why not_?"

"I had an accident at Faison's estate in Russia. I fell off a horse. The chances of a first trimester pregnancy surviving that kind of fall they're...next to nil."

David frowned, wondering what else had happened while she was there. Suddenly no longer wanting to know. "I'd still want to know...to be absolutely sure."

"Look...it doesn't matter anymore. He's my son. That's all that matters."

"If he's Dimitri's then all this...it's for nothing, Alex!"

"If Faison sees me with a little boy that he _thinks _could be his, then _that's _all that matters!" she shot back. "Don't you get it? He's not going to do a DNA test and _then _take him! I could return to England and pay for a full-page ad in a major paper announcing Liam's parentage and Faison still wouldn't buy it. He's not exactly rational. Trust me on this one."

David cupped his head in his palms. "Still. There has to be another way..."

"I don't expect you to keep this from Anna and Robin. Please tell them I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt them."

"I know."

"Please tell them I love them very much. But let me figure out what to do next on my own."

"Alex...for chrissakes, let us help you!"

"Not yet," she insisted. "Please. I need to contact Dimitri before you tell Robin. It would be so damn unfair if I didn't."

David shook his head, frustrated again. Was there anyone more stubbornly self reliant than Alex Devane?

_Yeah, your wife._

Then again, if she'd accept anyone's help it would be Dimitri Marick's. The brooding Hungarian was the only person David had ever known to crack through Alex's walls. For a moment David wondered what he was up to these days. Anna had very sporadic contact with Dimitri and last he heard through her was that Marick had a new girlfriend.

_Alex needs someone in her corner. Desperately. But it has to be someone who loves her so much he won't let her give in to her fears. I really hope you're still that guy, Marick. _

"Fine," he conceded. "I said I owed you and I meant it. My daughter's alive today because of what you did two years ago. I won't forget that."

"Thanks," she said softly.

"Can I trust you not to take off and disappear again as soon as I leave Vancouver?"

She shrugged her shoulders and gave him a lop-sided smile. "I don't know, can you?"

David chuckled. Some things never changed. It was pointless to fight it. Maybe he should have enjoyed their verbal sparring a little more in their younger days, instead of trying so hard to come out on top. _It's too bad my ego was too big to handle you then, 'cause professionally we could have made a hell of team_.

"I think so."

They took their time finishing the coffee and cake, and as the conversation progressed, it was Alex who had the majority of the questions for him. Wanting to know everything from what he was doing at Seaview to how expansive Leah's vocabulary was these days.

By the end of it, he also knew that her son's name was Liam, that he was crazy about trains and that she worked nights at a downtown clinic. It felt almost felt like an afternoon catching up with an old friend. The feeling was cemented when Alex surprised him by giving him a hug afterwards.

_So I'm not the only one who's changed. _

"Never thought I'd say this," she told him. "But it was good to see you today, David_. Really_ good."

He returned her embrace, surprised to find himself thinking the same thing.

* * *

Big thanks always to my two awesome editors, Kel and Annie!


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

_Pine Valley, Pennsylvania, USA_

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_

* * *

_

"I can't believe you forgot the maple butter," Maggie sighed as she sat down across from him at the dining room table. "One thing, David. I ask you to get _one _thing. It's like me forgetting to feed your guinea pig."

"Did you?" David asked her.

"Did I what?"

"Feed Ruben?"

Maggie cupped her hot chocolate. "Yeah, yeah, yeah...baby carrots and then lettuce in the afternoon, just like you said. Leah reminded me about seven times."

David smiled. "Glad to see my daughter's on top of things."

"Unlike her Dad," she groaned. She looked at the ceiling as if considering something. "Then again, just looking at a stupid container of maple butter will probably set me off like everything else that reminds me of her."

David eyed her.

"Sophie's parents used to send them to her from Quebec," she explained.

David took a sip of the red wine in his glass, stifling a yawn. It had been a long day. He probably set a new personal record for miles travelled in twenty-four hours. Leah was fast asleep; wiped out from a day with her cousin. David was sure he'd follow suit very shortly.

"My...meeting ran later than I thought. I almost missed the last flight out to O'Hare," he told her. "It would have been either me tonight or me _and_ the maple butter tomorrow."

"And what's wrong with the latter?" Maggie grinned, leaning forward. "So are you finally going to tell me what this mysterious trip was all about? Are you having a hot affair while Anna's jetting off to Africa alone."

David almost choked on his wine. His cousin was shameless. Truly. "Uh...no."

Maggie's smile was sly. "Good. I like Anna. She's good at keeping you in line. Plus, she's kinda hot for someone who's old enough to be my Mom."

David cringed at first, then he went along, clinking his glass with her mug. "Well, here's to being a kept man, then."

She got up to give him a hug and a kiss on his cheek. "Since I'm going to get nothing juicy out of you tonight, I'm heading up to Robin's disgustingly neat room to check some stuff online and then hit the sheets. Seriously, your little princess wore me out today. I'm not convinced anymore that this is a good deal...this babysitting in exchange for free room and board."

Davis laughed. "In that case I can suggest some hotels."

"Hey!" Maggie raised her hand in defense. "_Just_ kidding!" She gave him another kiss for good measure. "By the way, did you know it's almost three am? You really should hit the sheets too, before those bags under yours eyes sag down to your chin. Might wreck your rugged good looks."

David raised his glass. "Another toast...to your subtle, tactful nature."

Maggie laughed as she left the kitchen, leaving David behind with a lingering smile on his face. Much as his cousin's arrival had been a complete surprise, he'd be lying if he said he wasn't happy to have her here.

The cabin felt empty somehow without Anna's presence. Maggie's feistiness was a nice antidote.

The kitchen was silent now and his thoughts went back to Vancouver. He still couldn't quite get over seeing Alex again.

_We had a chat, over cake and coffee. Like it was the most natural thing in the world. As if we haven't spent most of our professional lives hating each others guts and you haven't been missing for the last two years. _

He stared out the window into the total darkness of the forest that surrounded his mountain cabin. He loved the stillness here at night and wondered if he'd ever be able to go back to living on a noisy city street.

He thought of the bleak neighbourhood he'd found Alex in and wondered how it must have felt to have moved there, after living in the beautiful Hungarian countryside.

_Were you telling me the truth when you said I could trust you not to run again? When you asked me to hold off telling Anna until you contacted Dimitri and Andrei? _

Dimitri Marick had no idea where Alex was. Or even whether she was alive or dead.

_If the tables were turned and it was Anna in her place, I'd want to know. God, I'd give and arm and a leg to know..._

David rested his chin in the palm of his hand, feeling the prickliness of his growing stubble.

He knew that Anna had Dimitri's phone number in her desk upstairs somewhere.

_It's not my place to make that call. Hell, it's not like I even give a damn about Marick._

_But if Alex doesn't call him. _

_And it were Anna in her place... _

David set down his wineglass and went upstairs.

_London, England_

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_

* * *

_

"You're reading?" Dimitri Marick stared at his son, lying on the sofa, perplexed. During school it was a struggle to put a book in his hands, and now that he had time off for spring break, Andrei was reading. Voluntarily.

"Stay there," Dimitri told him. "I'm going to get the camera."

Andrei frowned. "You are very funny."

Dimitri sat down next to his son, pushing Andrei's feet off the coffee table. "What are you reading anyway?"

"It's not a book. It's a guide," Andrei told him. "I need to know what to do. Where to go."

Dimitri eyed the title of the paperback. _Fodor's Guide to Ibiza and Formentera. _

"It says there are horseback riding trails here," he pointed out to him, sitting up straight, next to Dimitri now. "See...here is the hotel and here..." His index finger ran along the map that was on the page, away from the island's coast and inland. "And here there are trails. For bikes and horses."

Dimitri looked at him in disbelief. He was taking him to the party capital of Europe and he wanted to go...horseback riding? He took a long look at his son wondering if he was playing a joke on him. But Andrei barely noticed him, he was too engrossed in the guidebook.

_If I didn't already know it, I'd wonder if you were adopted..._

"Do you think I can take a taxi there?" Andrei asked him.

"I think you're crazy, is what I think." He'd change his mind Dimitri thought, once he got to the beach and saw the beautiful women and the pitchers of sangria. He flipped through his guide book and pointed to a beach scene. "That's what people do in Ibiza," he told him. "Party."

"But look at those people," Andrei shot back. "Do I look like them?" He pointed to his braces, which were finally ready to come off in a couple of weeks. "I still have metal in my mouth and I'm sure I'm shorter than the shortest girl in that photo."

Dimitri cringed. So Andrei wasn't the best looking kid on the block but he had more than enough personality to make up for it. He was a Marick, after all. "Trust me, that's an ad. Not a real photo. The beach is really full of pale Englishmen with beer bellies."

Andrei flashed him a metallic grin. "Then you and Helen have fun with your ugly Englishmen. Girls ride horses too you know and that's where I will look great. Riding a horse."

Dimitri laughed, liking his answer. Andrei was aware of his limitations, but he wasn't insecure. He knew that it was about focusing on your strengths, while being aware of your weaknesses. _That _was a winning combination and it made Dimitri proud.

_You have no idea how far you've come since I plucked you out of that orphanage and you made me jump from a moving train after you tried to run away._

Andrei ran away a few times after that too. He also nearly got expelled from school for stealing his teacher's bracelet. But then Alex took him for a ride on Tempus one early morning and everything changed.

Andrei flipped back to a page with a photo showing a riding trail. "It looks fantastic. I cannot wait."

"One more day," Dimitri told him, suddenly no longer dreading the destination Helen chose. If it made Andrei happy, he was fine with it.

Dimitri's cell phone rang and he excused himself as he stepped out into the hallway to answer it. He was sure it was the sheikh from Dubai again, the one who hadn't been too pleased about Dimitri cancelling his trip there.

He leaned against the wall outside, surprised to see the number come from Pennsylvania.

'Edmund,' he thought automatically. Although they didn't have as much time to meet up as he'd like, he tried to stay in touch with his brother and his family as much as he could.

_"Dimitri?" _

It wasn't Edmund's voice.

"Yes...who is this?"

_"David Hayward." _

Dimitri frowned. He hadn't heard from Hayward since the last time he'd seen him in Moscow two years ago.

"What can I do for you?"

_"Has Alex contacted you?" _

"What?"His heart skipped a beat. What kind of a question was that? "Is this a joke?"

_"I take it that's a no. Look...there's something I need to tell you. A little while back Robin saw an article in a medical journal she thought might have been written by Alex. I followed up on it, and, long story short, tracked down the author." _

"What?"

_"With some help from an IT guy, I tracked down her address. I flew to Vancouver today to see her. Robin was right on the mark. Alex did write the article." _

Dimitri was glad he was leaning against the wall. He felt as though someone had knocked the air out of his lungs. Hayward's words echoed in his mind.

_"I flew to Vancouver today to see her." _

Alex was alive and Hayward had found her. How was that possible?

_"Dimitri, are you there?" _

"Yeah..."

_"I think you should go and see her." _

"Is she...alright?"

There was a pause on the other end. _"Physically she's fine, yes. Absolutely. Not that I think she was when she left Moscow. Look, she's had her reasons for doing what she did...and I think you really should..." _

"If she's fine why hasn't she contacted any of us?"What exactly was he expecting to hear? Amnesia? A coma?

_"I think you should find that out from her."_

"What is she doing in Canada?"

_"I don't know...she's living and working there...but that's not the point."_

Dimitri took in a sharp breath, willing his knees to stop shaking. "She fine...and she's living and working in Canada? Explain that to me?"

_"I'm not the one to explain her circumstances to you, really I'm not. I'm telling you I found her and if there's any part of you that still cares for her, then you need to go see her!"_

"Vancouver's one the other side of the planet...I'm flying to Spain tomorrow."

_"Oh for chrissakes, don't you have a couple of private jets at your disposal?"_

"Stop this and tell me what the hell is going on!"

Hayward's annoyance was audible in his voice. _"I'm not explaining myself over the phone...I'm going to give you an address now and telling you, that you need to go see her."_

Dimitri didn't answer.

_"Are you there? Do you have a pen and paper?" _

Dimitri pulled out the Montblanc from his jacket pocket and moved to a drawer that had some mail scattered on top of it.

"Yeah..."He scribbled down the street name and number David gave him.

_"Go and see her." _

"Tell me what she said to you when you saw her."

_"She needs to tell you. Not me." _

"David! Don't just give me a damn address and expect me to jet off to Canada! Tell me more than that!"

_"That's all I have for you, Marick. Either go or don't go. It's your choice." _

"David..."

There was silence on the other end. Hayward had hung up.

"Bastard..." Dimitri mouthed aloud. He re-dialled the number and Hayward answered it gruffly.

_"I have nothing else for you, Dimitri. It's not a joke. It's not a trick. If you still give a damn about Alex go and see her." _

"I can't just..."

Click.

He'd hung up a second time and this time Dimitri hurled the phone down the hallway, followed by one of his favourite Hungarian expletives.

The commotion drew out Andrei from his room and elicited a look of surprise on his face.

"It was not a good conversation you were having?"

Dimitri walked a few steps and bent down to pick up the phone.

"Are you okay?" Andrei asked, his look of surprise mixing with concern now.

Dimitri nodded. "Yes...I'll be okay."

"Did you get bad news? Are all the horses at Vadsel okay?"

"Yes, everything's fine at Vadsel."

"Are you sure?"

Dimitri draped an arm around his son. "Yeah...I'm sure." _How would Andrei react to what Hayward just called to say? Was it even true? Had he really found Alex and gone to see her in Canada? Was she well and alive halfway across the world from them? _

_And if so...why? Why not let them know? Why put them through two years of hell of not knowing whether she was alive or not? There couldn't be a good enough reason in the world. _

"Are we still going to Ibiza tomorrow?"

Dimitri set down the phone on the drawer and turned it off. He ripped off a piece of paper from the envelope where he'd written down the address, folded it and put it in his shirt pocket. He mustered a smile, hoping it would wipe the look of concern off Andrei's face.

"Yes...yes, of course."

_Rome, Italy_

__

_

* * *

_

"_Un doppio espresso, per favore_," Anna Devane told the waiter just after she took a seat at a small, touristy cafe that had a corner view of the Trevi fountain.

Her Italian was rusty. In spite of spending some time in the country after Robin was born here, she'd never bothered to attain a genuine fluency. Filomena had spoiled her by speaking mostly English to her during their time together.

"_Grazie_," she said when the waiter brought her the coffee only moments later. Still, it was good enough to get by without insisting on English like most of the tourists around her.

Anna poured an aspirin from the container she bought at a nearby pharmacy. Her headache wasn't nearly as bad as last night, and she figured the aspirin combined with the espresso would take care of it for good. Another battle won.

She swallowed it with a sip of water that came in a tall glass without ice, along with the coffee, thinking back to the night before.

The hotel that the airport limo driver had found for her was small and overpriced and her room, in spite of being only blocks from the _Coliseo, _had a view of an alleyway and a brick wall. In hindsight, that had been a plus. It meant she wasn't facing a noisy main street and got a decent night's sleep. Besides, beggars couldn't be choosers. Thanks to the many travellers stuck here, the city's hotels were almost all fully booked. She knew she was lucky to have gotten a room at all.

_It could've been worse. I could've spent the night sleeping at Fiumicino' s Terminal C. _

After texting David and letting him know she was stuck here, she checked the hotel's internet to see whether anything had changed at the airport. Apparently the baggage handlers had reached an agreement with the negotiators and they were expecting flights to leave as early as this evening again. It meant she had to head back out to Fiumicino later this afternoon and cross her fingers.

That gave her half a day in the Eternal City. To soak in its timelessness and its warmth and buy something to wear from one of the elegant shops on the _Via dei Condotti_.

She stared at the Trevi fountain as she finished the espresso. The lavish Baroque fountain was surrounded by tourists and vendors hawking goods. Anna smiled when she saw someone turn their back to the fountain as they tossed a coin into it. The tradition was supposed to ensure a return to Rome.

Anna closed her eyes, enjoying the morning sun.

She hadn't planned on an Italian stop-over but it felt good to be back here. Even if Rome wasn't exactly San Remo where she'd spent the bulk of her time in Italy, raising Robin with Filomena's help, before moving to the United States.

She'd come here after losing Robert. Unsure of how to raise a child by herself, in a country that wasn't her own. She somehow found strength to do it.

Then, years later, she left David to give birth to his daughter in Paris and raise her second daughter in yet another foreign country.

"And now what?" she asked herself aloud. Anna knew she was more than capable of picking up the pieces and starting over on her own. Not that it meant she wanted to. 'But things have to change,' she thought. 'I can't be with someone who doesn't trust me to fight my own battles.' She thought back to the many nights spent in David Hayward's arms and fought back a smile that left her lips as quickly as it came. 'No matter how much I love him.'

Her wedding was only a few months away and yet it was the furthest thing from her mind. Part of her cringed at the thought. She still didn't feel the need for a ring and a wedding license to solidify her relationship with David. After all, they'd never been about convention had they? Why start now?

'For Leah,' she reminded herself. 'And for David.'

David Hayward, who'd gone from self-confessed bachelor to wanting not only a wedding but a big, conventional one with all the trimmings and a guest list so long it made Anna nervous just thinking about it.

She bit her lip as she stared at the increasing crowd at the fountain. She wondered why she was getting cold feet, when really she should be the calm one here. 'After all, I've done this before. More than once.' David was the one who was new to this. Unless you counted their first, hasty wedding, which neither of them had taken seriously, until they fell in love.

'Stop it...' she chided herself. 'First things first,' she thought. Getting to Africa and making sure Robin was alright was her first priority. Then she'd call Sean and get his help in tracking down the leads that David had found.

The thought of finding her sister sent a shiver of excitement up her spine.

A smile found its way on her lips again as she got up from her chair. 'And if you're alright Robin, you're going to get an earful for not telling me about that article.'

* * *

Authors note: I know Edmund Grey is no longer alive on the show, but since he was when I first started the previous story, Strangers, and I didn't mention his death in it, I figured I'd keep him alive in my alternate universe. And as always, big thanks to my two awesome proof readers, Annie and Kel.


	13. Chapter 13

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**Chapter 13**

_Two days later_

_Ibiza, Spain_

_

* * *

_

The music throbbed and pulsed, like the veins on his forehead.

It was so loud he couldn't speak. Or think.

Bodies bobbed in unison around him, like a giant undulating wave, occasionally interspersed with someone bobbing out of rhythm, like a fish flailing in water, until he or she was brought back into the giant uniform wave.

"Isn't this great?" Helen mouthed. Or at least that's what he thought she was saying.

It wasn't, Dimitri Marick thought. Helen looking lovely in a short, strapless blue dress that matched the blue of her eyes, _that_ was nice. The rest not so much.

The night before he'd impressed himself by keeping up both in dancing and drinking with those less than half his age. But a second night was asking for trouble.

He put his hand on Helen's lower back and nudged her away from the crowd. Away from the tanned young man who'd been dancing more intimately with her than he cared. Dimitri glared at him.

She looked disappointed. "Dimi! We had a prime spot by the DJ!"

The DJ in question was far enough from them now that he could hear her and no longer had to lip read. "Sweetheart...I can't. The music is so loud I'm sure mainland Spain can hear it."

Helen laughed. "You had a good time last night, didn't you?"

It was true he did. It had been like a dare. Like bungee jumping. His most vivid memory of the night before hadn't been the music, or the drinking and dancing, but holding back Helen's hair as she got sick almost as soon as they were back at the hotel.

It made him think he was a teenager on a date. And he wasn't entirely convinced it was a good feeling anymore.

"I did, but I don't want to do this every night. Do you?" Already now Dimitri was certain this evening too would end the same way it did last night and it made him shudder involuntarily.

"Dimi...you're tired, that's all." She pulled something out of her tiny purse. "Here..." she handed him a little pink pill. "This'll make you feel fabulous."

"I don't need something for a headache. I need a place where the music isn't so loud that the ground is vibrating."

Helen laughed. "It's not an aspirin, idiot. Trust me...I'm amazed you made it through last night without one."

Understanding now what she was offering him made him groan. He pushed her hand away. "Do you even know what that is?"

She smiled. "I know it's making me feel great. Stop thinking so much and take it."

"No," he said firmly. "I'm too old for party drugs." He almost added that he thought she was too. He also knew if he'd seen Andrei take this stuff in front of him, his reaction would have been a lot less kind. "I'm going to call it a night."

She was clearly disappointed. "I thought we came here to have a good time. Why are you being like this?"

"I thought we came here to have a good time too..." he said softly. "I'm going back to the hotel," he announced, louder. "I'd love it if you came with me."

"We can't leave. It's not even midnight!"

"I don't want to spend every night watching you throw up."

"Oh please..." She looked offended. "When the hell did you get so self-righteous?"

"It has nothing to do..."

"Yes, it does." She cut him off and tugged at his sweat-drenched shirt. "Come on, Dimi!" She managed a smile. "Don't make me spend the rest of the night dancing with young Spanish men."

"I'd like you to come back with _me_," he repeated. There was a roar of applause from the crowd. Maybe another DJ had arrived.

"He's here!" Helen's face lit up. She was gorgeous when she smiled.

But he freed himself from her grasp. "I'm going to head back."

"What is wrong with you?"

"I'd like to spend an evening with you...not you and a thousand sweaty bodies and music so loud it makes my head hurt."

"So, you want to go back to our room and flip channels on the telly like an old married couple?"

Dimitri raised his brows. He was thinking more along the lines of a good meal and good conversation, followed a night together that they might both remember the next morning. But right now, even a night in front of the television was starting to sound appealing.

"We started seeing each other because_ you_ said you wanted to have a good time again. Did that change?" She put an arm around his shoulder, offering him another smile. Letting him know she wasn't up for an argument. "I don't want that to change. It's been a lot of fun so far, Dimi."

"I'd like..." He hesitated. It was a harder question to answer than he might have thought. Especially given how foggy his thoughts felt. "I'd like it to be more than that. To spend an evening together doing, I don't know, nothing at all..."

Sometimes he'd spend hours out on the grounds at Vadsel, after a ride with Alex. Reading, dozing off under the afternoon sun, staring at the clouds, at the horses, at her...

How could something that felt so simple and natural be so impossibly hard to replicate?

Helen's smile faded. "Fine, Dimi. Act like the senior citizen that you are. No wonder your wife left you!"

Dimitri thought he might've been too tired and too inebriated for_ that_ one to hurt. Sadly he was wrong.

"'Good night," he mumbled and walked away.

He wondered whether she cared and he suddenly realized that there was a good chance that she didn't.

_Kigali, Rwanda_

__

_

* * *

_

Anna Devane walked into the large resort lobby, impressed.

The hotel where her daughter was staying at put every other building she'd seen on her ride in from the airport to shame. It was sparkling clean and had touches of unexpected opulence, like the crystal chandelier hanging high above her head.

However, after the hot, dusty ride in on the backseat of one of the motorcycle-taxis that were the preferred mode of transportation here, it was the central air-conditioning that felt like the biggest luxury of all. The heat was different here than the welcoming warmth of Rome. Here it felt heavy, moist and oppressive. Breathing alone took more effort than it should. Anna had dissected a guide book during her last two flights, and remembered reading that it was a mountainous country, with an average altitude higher than that of most nations in the world.

The heat was stifling, the air was thin...and there were refugees pouring in from a civil war to the west. Never mind the brutal genocide they had here during their own recent civil war.

_Of all the countries in the world, you had to pick this one, sweetheart? Something like Nicaragua wouldn't have been enough of a challenge? _

Anna wondered how Robin could stand it all day long, when she was out in the field, tending to the wounded, in medical tents in the middle of hot, crowded refugee camps. She'd always known her daughter had a strength that belied her small frame, but this kind of work called for a whole other level of grit.

_My little girl's become a fighter. One who just happens to be brilliant and beautiful too. _

The thought suddenly flooded her with admiration for what Robin had accomplished. Against all odds.

A sign in the lobby announced an in-house spa, offering massages and facials. Anna found a house phone next to a large, elaborately framed mirror. Much as she liked the idea of Robin staying here, it didn't make sense, she thought; that a non-profit organization like _Medecins sans Frontieres_ would house its workers in these kind of accommodations.

She stared at herself in the mirror, pleased with the purchases she made in Rome. A simple but beautifully cut white blouse and dark linen slacks that were perfect for this weather. A thick leather belt and her large, silver Raymond Weil men's watch were the only two things more fashionable than functional about her outfit. Even the leather shoes she wore had heels low enough that she'd be able to take off in a sprint if need be.

_Once an agent, always an agent. _

Her black messenger purse was still the only thing she carried with her. The suitcase that had spent two nights at Fiumicino didn't make it to Kigali. It didn't surprise Anna. In fact what would surprise her at this point would be seeing it again in this lifetime.

"Robin Scorpio's room please," she told the operator, who connected her.

It rang twice before her daughter picked up on the other end. "Mom, you made it!"

Anna smiled. "Didn't I say I would?"

Robin gave her the room number and Anna made her way to the nearest elevator.

When she got off and walked towards her daughter's room, she noticed a man sitting on a chair beside the room. He got up as soon as she came near.

It was then that Anna noticed he was armed.

Anna swallowed, her throat dry. Something was wrong. _Very_ wrong.

The guard demanded, in French, to know what she was doing here.

_"Je suis...je suis sa mere." _

"_Avez vous preuve de votre identite?_" he demanded and Anna was about to take out her wallet when Robin opened the door and explained to the guard who she was.

She looked apologetic. "I'm sorry, Mom. I completely forgot he was here until I heard his voice..."

Anna walked past the guard, who apologized as well, and into the room, shutting the door behind them before taking her daughter into her arms. "Sweetheart...what the hell is going on?" Another full-length mirror at the entrance showed her that the colour had drained from her face.

"You look amazing, Mom. No one would ever guess you've spent the last three days in transit..."

Anna gave her a sombre look. "Don't change the subject." She pointed to the door. "There's an armed man guarding your room! Do you want to tell me what kind of trouble you're in?"

"Trouble?"

"I thought you were ill, that there was a problem with your protocol?"

Robin pulled her over to her bed. She was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, not in pyjamas or a nightgown. "Mom...let me explain. It's true, I am...I _was_. I couldn't refrigerate half my meds out in the field and because of it I couldn't take some of them. I got the flu and it made me sicker than it should have."

Anna eyed her. Robin looked good. Maybe a bit skinnier than last time she'd seen her, but not ill. "And you're alright now?"

"Yeah. I spent a couple of nights in a hospital here and the last two days, I've done nothing but eat and sleep. I'm_ much_ better."

Anna looked into her daughter's eyes, trying to gauge the rest of the story from them. There was still so much that didn't make sense to her. The Robin she knew wouldn't have asked her mother to come to Africa because she didn't feel well for a few days. Never mind the luxurious surroundings and the armed guard outside the door.

"You sure you're alright?" she asked, her voice softening.

"Yeah, I'm sure. I'm back on track with my meds and I'm hoping within a week my t-cell count will be back to normal too."

"Did all this at least convince you that working in an African refugee camp is not a good idea for someone with a compromised immune system?"

"Mom...I don't want to have this argument again."

Anna smiled a lopsided smile. "I didn't fly all this way to _not_ have this argument. I swear, I'm going to get through your thick, stubborn skull before I leave this continent."

Robin chuckled. "We'll see..."

"So, if you don't want to talk about your health, do you want to talk about why there's an armed guard outside your room?"

Robin frowned and it looked to Anna as though that was an even less favourable topic of discussion.

_Too bad, Robin. We're going there. _

Anna decided to help her out. "David said you saw Sandrine Mutanga, of all people, at the market where you fainted? Does she and the WSB have anything to do with this?"

"Kind of..."

"Kind of?" Anna sighed. "Robin...you know I've been trying to get in touch with Sandrine for over a year, right?"

"Yeah, I know."

"She worked with myself, Sean and Dan when we were searching for Alex and then, when were in Moscow, she suddenly disappeared from the face of the Earth. When we did find out that she'd gone back to Africa, some regional director made it very clear that both Sandrine and her partner were unreachable."

"I know."

"Her partner was the man who helped Alex get out of Faison's estate! We had all sorts of questions for him and her. What she did...it wasn't just unethical. It was...devious and calculating and for god knows what reasons! And now...a few days after you run into her, there's an armed guard on your door?"

Robin didn't say anything and her gaze had shifted to the floor.

"Sweetheart, what is going on? What are you not telling me?"

"It was an afternoon in Paris when I met Sandrine for the first time. Do you remember, Mom? You sent her over to my apartment to get some disc. Something you'd left behind."

Anna shrugged her shoulders. She couldn't exactly remember that afternoon, no. So many of those endlessly long days were a blur to her now. All of them were running on fumes then. Leah was still recovering from Faison's virus and the kind of migraines she got only on occasion these days had been a daily constant. It was a time she preferred to forget.

"Sure...I remember," she told Robin.

"When I went to look for the disc, Sandrine saw a photo we had on a bookshelf. A photo of you and me and Dad, when I was about eight years old. Sandrine picked it up and looked at it."

Anna eyed her not sure where this was going.

Robin smiled. "I thought it was weird. I mean, what would she care, right? But then I remembered that she's WSB too, so maybe she'd heard of you and Dad. Sandrine confirmed it, saying she'd heard that Dad was going to be the director of the WSB, before he died."

"And?"

"Then she asked me if I missed him."

Anna narrowed her brows, still wondering what all this had to do with the armed guard outside the door.

"I said, yes, of course all the time." Robin looked at her, with those gentle, wise-beyond-her-years eyes that Anna knew so well. "We talked a bit about you and Dad too and then I wondered what Dad would think if he knew I was studying medicine."

"You told Sandrine all that?"

"She told me he'd be proud."

Anna frowned. That might've been a nice response to a young woman missing her father but it also implied a familiarity that Sandrine had no right to.

"I thought she was just being nice back then," Robin. "You know, saying what I wanted to hear. But now when I look back...I know it was so much more than that."

Anna sighed. Maybe she was more tired and jet-lagged than she thought, or maybe her daughter really was making as little sense as it felt like. "Robin, where are you going with all this? What does that afternoon in Paris have to do with anything?"

She her daughter take a deep, cautious breath. "Mom...Sandrine knew Dad. Personally. _She still does_."

Anna fought back a chuckle. After a ludicrously long journey, she'd arrived in Africa to find her daughter saying things that made no sense. It was all starting to feel surreal. She was torn between wanting to laugh and wanting to worry. She moved to sit down next to Robin on her giant, king-size bed. "Sweetheart, you're not making any sense."

Robin's face was dead serious now. "Mom...you couldn't find Sandrine's partner, because he didn't want to be found! Because he wasn't who you thought he was. _Dad_ was her partner. Roger Saunders was an alias for Robert Scorpio."

Anna did laugh now. There was no other possible reaction. Because what Robin was saying was so preposterous, it didn't merit any other response.

Roger Saunders_ couldn't_ be Robert Scorpio. Never mind that Robert's life had ended in a ball of fire off the coast of Venezuela years ago. Or that the man she knew and loved more than anyone else in the world, would never have stayed away from them if he didn't.

There were simple logistics that made Robin's announcement completely absurd. Sure they'd never seen a photo of Sandrine's partner or made any sort of contact with him, but Alex did.

Roger Saunders had helped Alex escape from Alexei Estate. If he was Robert Scorpio, Alex would have told her. It was that simple.

A chill went up her spine as she remembered the last promise she'd made to her sister before she disappeared.

"_I need you to do something else for me, Anna. Promise me you'll find Roger Saunders. To thank him for me. Please." _

She hadn't understood her sister's request then, had gone so far as to question it. But Alex's expression had been so serious. So intense.

_"Promise me that you'll look for him?" _

It had felt so urgent that of course Anna had agreed. Not that she didn't want to find him as it was anyway.

"Mom...?"

Robin's face was just as serious as Alex's had been then and suddenly her urge to laugh was gone.

Her daughter gently clasped one of her hands into both of hers. "Mom..." she said softly. "It's why I asked you to come to Africa. Because...I couldn't find a way to tell you over the phone that Dad's alive."

_Ibiza, Spain_

__

_

* * *

_

Dimitri Marick went to his room and the first thing he did was take an ice cold shower and brew a cup of coffee.

It had been tempting to fall into bed, but if he did he knew he'd wake up feeling as wretched as he did this morning.

Part of him hoped that Helen had come to her senses and would have joined him by the time he stepped out of the shower. But instead he poured the coffee from the percolator in solitude.

Another part of him knew he wouldn't be able to sleep until she got back anyway. He wondered what she was doing with whom, shuddering at the thought.

He knew he had to go back outside to look for her. It was the right thing to do. But he couldn't bring himself to do it just yet.

_I'm not the only one who's too old for this._

It wasn't as though he was dating a twenty-year old. In reality Helen was only a handful of years younger than Alex.

Alex.

_Why don't I stop lying to myself and admit the only thing I've thought about since coming here is that damn phone call from David? It's why I humoured Helen and spent the entire night drinking and dancing yesterday. To push that stupid thought out of my mind. _

He stepped out into the balcony. He could hear the music in the distance and see the lights from the concert.

It made him miss the absolute stillness of Vadsel, where the only thing you could hear at night were the crickets and the horses in the stables.

For the first time in a long time he felt so uncomfortable he wanted to crawl out of his skin. To be anywhere but here.

It was a feeling that was alien to him and he didn't know quite what to do with it. The emptiness of it all made him long for someone's company.

He set down his coffee cup and left the room, heading down the hotel corridor towards Andrei's room.

Dimitri knocked. Normally at first and then he pounded on the door with some force, knowing if Andrei was asleep it would be necessary. His son could probably sleep through a nuclear attack.

Another hotel guest stuck his head out the door in the hallway and glared at him.

_"Spinnen Sie?" _he yelled in German.

Dimitri raised his hand in apology. "_Entschuldigung_."

His son finally opened the door, looking as though he'd just jumped out of bed. "What is going on?" he demanded. "Are you crazy? Do you want me to have a heart attack?"

The sight of him made Dimitri smile. "No...I just wanted to wake you up."

"You did this," Andrei told him, yawning. "If that's all you wanted you did good. Now let me go back to sleep."

"Andrei..."

His son's expression lost its irritation and he now looked at him with something that resembled concern. "Are you okay, Dad? You look terrible."

"Thanks."

"Is something wrong with you and Helen?"

"No," he shrugged his shoulders. It was a lie. There was. He might as well admit it. "I don't know. But I don't want to talk about that."

Andrei raised a skeptical brow. "What _do_ you want to talk about at two in the morning?"

It was a good question, Dimitri thought. There wasn't anything really. "What did you do today?" he asked Andrei.

Andrei squinted. "Can I tell you at breakfast?"

"I was just curious..."

"Are you really okay, Dad?"

Dimitri nodded. "I'll be fine."

His son was fully awake now and he sensed that Dimitri wasn't going to leave. Andrei went to grab his camera. "Here. I will show you."

Dimitri flipped through the photos on the camera, seeing trails, countryside farms and hillside views of the Mediterranean, feeling a pang of jealousy when he realized Andrei was doing exactly what he'd have liked to have done on this trip. The many pictures of horses made him grin. "Have you never seen a horse before? I'm starting to think you're obsessed."

"I like that one," Andrei told him pointing to a grey stallion.

"Eh..." Dimitri shrugged his shoulders. "They're not exactly thoroughbreds."

"You think only thoroughbreds are worth looking at?" Andrei shot back

Dimitri raised his brows. The sting in his question took him back to that miserable night at Vadsel, after he'd hosted a party to welcome Andrei into the family, attended by dozens of Andrassys and other houses of European nobility.

He'd done it all too soon, Dimitri realized afterwards. Andrei wasn't ready. He'd still thrived on pushing their every button back then and rebelling against his new home where he could. Worst of all, Alex hadn't been there to charm his guests. Called away to Paris by her sister at the last minute. After introducing him as the latest Marick, Andrei promptly shot back, in front of more than a hundred guests, that his last name was Ionescu.

That night that a few distant cousins suggested it was his own fault for adopting an "ungrateful brat" from a Romanian backwater orphanage. One whose ethnic background was a big question mark. Dimitri wasn't exactly sure what Andrei's heritage was, other than knowing his real mother was a gypsy.

"No," he answered, treading more carefully now. "It's not what I meant."

Andrei grinned letting him know he was messing with him. "But you are right that is an ugly horse." His grin got bigger. "But I like the ugly ones. They are sometimes more interesting. Like ugly people."

Dimitri laughed. It felt good to be here with him. "Agreed."

"So where is your girlfriend?" Andrei asked.

Dimitri shrugged. "I don't know. She's out there somewhere, having a good time."

"You should be with her," Andrei chided him. "There are a lot of crazy people on the beach."

"I know."

Andrei was right. Dimitri Marick was better than this. Whether or not he wanted to be out there or not was beside the point. Had Andrei done the same to his date, Dimitri would've sat him down and given him a stern lesson on what was expected of a gentleman. Or at least what_ he_ expected of his son.

Dimitri got up, knowing what he had to do.

_If she doesn't want to come back, you're going to stay there with her. If you're not ready to do that, you should never have agreed to come here. _

"Before you go, are you going to tell me what is bugging you?"

"David Hayward called me a couple of days ago."

Andrei eyed him and pushed himself off the bed, fully alert now. "Why?"

"He said he got a lead on Alex. That she might be in Vancouver." It wasn't exactly what he said, but then again he didn't entirely believe Hayward.

"Where?" Andrei looked shocked.

"Canada."

"Then why are you here? Why are you not going to Canada?"

"He suggested she might be living there. That she's perfectly fine."

Andrei's eyes widened and his face opened into a giant smile. "Dad! That is amazing. That's the best, best news in the world!"

Dimitri looked at him in disbelief. "Are you not the least bit perturbed by the possibility that she's been fine all this time and just decided to cut us out of her life? Without a word...without a damn reason?"

Andrei shook his head vehemently. "No...no, she was not okay in Moscow. For sure she was not. I remember in the hospital. Something happened to Alex when she was kidnapped. Something she didn't tell me and maybe didn't tell you. If she is alive, you have to go find out what happened."

Dimitri exhaled. If he'd thought Hayward had been insistent during his phone call, this was a whole other level of insistence. One he didn't quite understand. Especially from someone who was no stranger to having a mother walk out on him. His lack of resentment surprised him.

_Maybe it's different when it's your wife who leaves you. _

"Don't be too angry to find her," Andrei told him with a frown.

"She left us..." Dimitri repeated.

"My mother left me," Andrei told him. "She left me for her new boyfriend and dumped me in an orphanage. What Alex did...it's not the same."

Dimitri felt a guilty warmth flood his cheeks. Leave it to Andrei to put things into perspective. And to remind him that he wasn't the only one with something at stake.

"Please? Will you try to find her?"

Dimitri exhaled, knowing what the answer would be.

In truth, he wasn't too vain to think no woman would ever leave him. He didn't think quite that highly of himself. It's just that he didn't think Alex would.

"Alright...but first I'm going to find Helen and tell her that I need to leave tomorrow."

"I want to come with you when you go," Andrei told him.

Dimitri shook his head. "I need to do this alone. If I'm going to do this, let me do it my way."

Andrei bit his lip, clearly not liking the compromise. "Me, I _want_ to see her! Even if you are angry with her and never want to see her again."

"I _do_ want to see her," Dimitri admitted with a lopsided smile. "And I'd never keep you from her. She loves you."

Andrei crossed his arms. "I know."

Dimitri felt more sombre now, wondering if he'd been right to tell him about Hayward's call. To get his hopes up over something that might not even happen. "Do you want to come back to London with me?"

Andrei raised his brows. "No! If you don't let me come to Canada I want to stay here for the week. There are more trails I want to ride."

Dimitri pondered it, wondering if it was a good idea to leave his son in the party capital of Europe while he jetted halfway around the world. Then again, Andrei was eighteen now. An adult. When Dimitri was eighteen he'd already been shipped off to an army he didn't want to fight in. Eighteen was old enough to be a man. Besides, Andrei was on his own most of the time in England anyway.

Dimitri reached into his wallet and tossed Andrei one of his credit cards. "Use it if you need it. And please...keep an eye on Helen for me, okay?"

Andrei sighed. "This is a big job."

Dimitri smiled. "I've got faith in you."

"Now...go. Tell Helen, then get the first flight you can." Andrei got up to give him a hug. "I wish you good luck. Find Alex and tell her I miss her very much."

"I will. Promise."


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14 **

_Vancouver, Canada_

* * *

Alex Marick fastened the belt she wore and reached for her jacket when Liam came ambling into the room. Maria needed mussels for her paella and Alex decided she had time for a run to the market before work.

One of the suspenders on Liam's pants was loose and she bent down to fix it. He stood still, eyeing her while she did it.

"What are you eating?" she asked him, seeing a red fruit clasped in one of his chubby hands.

"Rawberry," he told her. His vocabulary was growing at a rate that impressed even her.

_My little genius. _

"Mmmm...strawberry," she smiled. "Want to share?"

He smiled back at her and opened the palm of his hand.

She took a bite and scooped the rest into his mouth. Liam loved strawberries. Even more so when Maria dipped them in sugar like the one he'd been holding just now, but Alex knew he'd have given her the whole thing if she asked. The concept of sharing was one thing she'd never have to teach him.

_How in the world did I end up with such a sweet kid? Is someone trying to remind me every single day how crazy I was to consider giving him up? _

She noticed now too that his nose was runny and Alex reached for a tissue, sitting down as she hoisted him up onto her lap to clean it.

"Tell me you're not getting a cold again..." she sighed, feeling his forehead. Little kids were germ factories. She's learned that too this past year. He leaned against her, licking the sugar off his fingers.

Alex kissed the top of his head. She loved the feel of his soft hair against her lips.

He coughed as she did, making her cringe. "You are getting a cold, sweetheart. I knew you shouldn't have played with that germy blonde kid at the park yesterday, no matter how pretty she was. Her mom was reaching for tissues all afternoon. I'm telling you, girls are bad news. On all counts."

At least he wasn't cranky. Not yet anyways. Truth was, he rarely was, even was he did get sick. In fact, Alex was still waiting for when all that would change during the height of the terrible twos, although she was starting to doubt that change would take place at all. Every day convinced her a little more that Liam was an old soul. One who wouldn't be rattled by much of anything.

"You're nothing like..." Alex caught herself and gave him another kiss on the cheek. "Stop it," she chided herself. "Bet he wasn't a psychopath at the age of two either."

The truth was, Liam's innate generosity reminded her of someone else. So did the way he embraced the love of the two women in his life and returned it tenfold.

_"Alejandra!" _

Alex heard Maria coming up the stairs. "I'm going...I'll get the mussels. Don't worry."

"No, it is not this." Maria came into her bedroom, out of breath. "There is a man at the door. He said he wants to speak to you. I told him you're not here, but he said he didn't believe me. That he will wait until you come back. On the doorstep. He is scaring me, Alejandra."

Alex's heart pounded. "There's _no one_ who knows we're here, Maria," she said softly.

Well, no one except David Hayward as of a few days ago.

She stood up with Liam in her arms and handed him over to Maria. "Hold on to him."

Alex moved to the window and pushed the curtain aside just enough that she could peek at the doorstep below. What she saw made her pounding heart skip a beat.

"Do you know him?" Maria asked.

Alex nodded, her hands shaking as she closed the curtain.

_"Quien es?" _

"His name is Dimitri."

"How do you know him?"

"He's my husband."

_Kigali, Rwanda _

* * *

Anna Devane looked at her daughter, still not sure whether to laugh or whether to shake her head in disbelief.

"Mom...are you listening to a word I'm saying?"

"I'm listening...I'm having a harder time believing."

Robin nodded, understanding. "I know. I didn't exactly believe Sandrine when she told me either. I thought she was playing this huge, cruel joke on me, and I couldn't for the life of me understand why."

Anna wondered what it would take to reason with her daughter. "Sweetheart, it's not _possible_ that your father is alive."

Robin narrowed her brows and Anna could sense her exasperation. "Mom...I'm not crazy. He's alive. He's here. I had dinner with him last night!"

Anna closed her eyes suddenly feeling exhausted. None of this made sense. The exclusive resort she was staying in. The guard outside the door. The unbelievable things Robin was saying.

_Robert couldn't have stayed away from us all these years if he really was alive. I know him well enough to know that. _

She wanted to open her eyes and wake up from this dream already.

Instead, she opened them to find Robin staring at her, a mix of worry and irritation etched on her face.

"I know it's a lot to digest," she said softly. "It's why I couldn't tell you over the phone..."

"Robin...if what you're saying is true, then tell me why?" She straightened her back and forced herself to rein in the dozen emotions she felt as she began to consider the possibility. She stood up and fought the urge to start pacing, placing her hands on her hips instead as she faced Robin. "Why in the world would he stay away from us all these years? Why play dead and live in Africa?"

"Mom...I think _you_ should ask him those questions."

"Are you saying you didn't?"

"Yeah, of course I did."

"Then tell me what he told you!"

"Mom...you should hear it from him."

Anna sighed, tired of the games that everyone she loved seemed to want to play with her lately.

"Tell me what he said." The tone of her voice made it clear that an honest answer was Robin's only option.

Her daughter suddenly looked very young to her again. "He said...he said that he made a deal with Faison."

"A deal? _With Faison_? Are you kidding me?"

"Look...I'm still just figuring things out myself. But he said he made some deal with Faison after the ship exploded in South America. That if he'd stay away from us, then Dad promised to do the same."

Anna looked at her incredulously.

"Dad said that Faison kept his part of the deal. For a long time. Until he kidnapped you in Paris. And that's when Dad broke his end of it too...and went to try and rescue you in Russia."

"Except it wasn't me..." Anna whispered.

_So Sandrine Mutanga hadn't come to Paris because of my past connection with Faison, in spite of what she told us. She'd come to join forces with the people searching for me, hoping they would lead her to Robert. As usual, Sean was right. He'd suspected something was off about her from the start. Imagine her shock, when she came to Paris and found out I'd never been kidnapped...that the man she loved had gone after the wrong woman. _

"Mom?" Robin looked at her with a mix of concern and hesitation.

_And how shocked must you have been to find your father here after waking up in a hospital in a country halfway across the world from your own. _

Anna stared at her.

_"Mom?" _

"What did you think when you first saw him again?" she asked softly.

There was relief on her daughter's face. "I thought...I don't know. I can't even try to explain all the crazy things I thought. I thought I was dreaming at first. That maybe I died...then I was so unbelievably happy I wanted to freeze that moment forever. To see Dad, looking at me, like he did when I was five years old and first stood in his living room. It made me feel like everything in my world was okay again."

Anna looked at her with admiration. _You have the biggest heart in the world, sweetheart._

"Then I was angry too." Robin smiled a sheepish smile. "I mean, _really_ angry. I thought how dare he walk out on us and then just expect to come back into my life? As if I was going to let him. After all, I'm not an impressionable twelve-year old anymore, right?"

Anna folded her arms, trying to make sense of her own feelings too.

"He wanted me to stay at his house, with Sandrine."

Anna smiled when she thought of Robin's reaction. "I see you turned him down. Which explains the fancy accommodations. I assume it's not _Medecins sans Frontieres_ footing the bill."

"No, it's not."

"But it doesn't explain the guard at the door."

"Dad thinks it's not safe for me to be near him. That me being around him means he once again he broke the deal with Faison."

Anna raised her brows. "Didn't he already break it when he went to Russia to try and rescue me?"

"That's what I thought too, but Dad figured it wouldn't hurt."

"Do _you_ feel safer with that man out there?" Anna asked her.

"No."

"I'll make sure he's gone by the end of the day." Anna had no doubts that if this so-called deal was already broken once, Faison wouldn't be a danger to her daughter. He was nothing if not methodical. Cesar Faison centred his life around his own rules. Frankly, she was more concerned with Robin being out in the field tending to armed rebels than she was about Faison coming after her. If he was a threat to Robin, he wouldn't have waited two years to make his move. Or would he?

"Does your father know I'm here?"

Robin nodded. "Yeah, I told him you're coming."

Anna took a deep breath. "Are you going to tell me where I can find him?"

"I have his phone number..." Robin moved to hand her a piece of paper.

"You think I should give him a head's up so he can get his story straight? How about an address instead?"

Robin cringed. "I don't know if that's a good idea...I mean, he's, you know, with Sandrine. She's pregnant."

Anna raised her brows. "That's just...great. Come to think of it, I have a few choice words for Ms. Mutanga too."

"Mom!" Robin looked mildly exasperated. "Sandrine...she's just as much of a pawn in this as we were, and you, you just found out Dad's alive. I don't think you know yourself what you're thinking right now."

Anna bit her tongue. "But you do?"

"No, that's not what I mean..."

Anna bent down to hiss her daughter's forehead. "I love you, sweetheart and I know you mean well. Everyone seems to know better than myself what's good for me lately. But if all this is really true...then I need to face your father on my terms. I don't make a good pawn."

Robin frowned. "Don't do anything crazy, Mom. I want you to come back, have dinner with me and spend an hour talking about Pine Valley and my gorgeous little sister. And you still have to tell me why it took you three days to get here!"

Anna chuckled. "Have a little faith, would you? I'm not going to kill anyone."

Robin dropped her shoulders in resignation, before writing down a street address on a piece of hotel stationary. "Alright, fine then. Do what you have to do. I'll just keep an eye out for fireworks coming from a certain residence in Kigali."

"You do that." She took the paper from Robin's hand and was about to leave the hotel room before turning back to Robin. "And, don't you dare give him a phone call to warn him."

_Vancouver, Canada_

* * *

_I am not ready for this. _

_I have no idea what I'm going to say and there's never been a time when I need to say the right things more than now. To say the words that will let you know I never meant to hurt you. _

"Alejandra?" Maria interrupted her, frenzied. "_What_ did you say? Your husband."

"_Mi marido_," she mumbled.

"I understand the word husband," Maria shot back. "What I do not understand is that _you_ have a husband."

"I do..." Alex cringed, wondering if she actually did. What in the world made her think he hadn't begun divorce proceedings at this point? She did see him at Ascot with another woman on TV. "No, I don't."

Maria stared at her perplexed. "Alejandra, I should be worried about you again?"

Alex closed her eyes. Dimitri wouldn't leave. Not if he was convinced she was here. She new him well enough to know that. Not that she didn't want to see him.

In fact, there wasn't much else she wanted more.

But not like this.

_Damn you, Hayward. It always has to be on your terms, doesn't it?_

"I'm not crazy, Maria," she said softly. "Just...confused."

"I can let him in?"

"Yes...No...Wait. I'll do it."

"You are sure?"

Alex nodded. She wasn't. But that didn't matter anymore.

Somehow she made her way downstairs to the door and steadied her hands and nerves enough to open it. She tried to steel herself against her emotions when she saw his face.

But that was pointless too.

"Hello, Alex."

The sound of his voice gave her goose bumps. There was a time when she was certain she'd hear it every day for the rest of her life.

It was just one more thing she'd taken for granted.

"Hello, Dimitri."

Her own voice sounded foreign to her. Whatever she'd thought to say to him, during those thirty seconds of preparation from bedroom to front door went out the window. Now she'd have to make do with being able to string more than two words together.

She stared at him, wanting to soak in the sight. Wanting to see whether every line in his face and every curve of his body was still the way she'd pictured it in her mind every day. Whether the hair she used to run her fingers through was still the same comforting mix of black and white.

She knew she was staring and had to tear her eyes away from his.

He wore a suit and tie, as he always did when he travelled. This time it was a dark, navy blue, with a yellow striped tie. There was only a minor wrinkle here and there that hinted at what had probably been a long journey. Alex assumed he'd arrived here direct from England or Hungary. Or maybe even from Pine Valley, although he'd hardly spent time there anymore in recent years. But maybe that had changed in the last two years.

His back was straight, rigid almost. Regal, commanding, elegant. The Dimitri Marick standing in front of her was all those things. He didn't wear his royal title so much as embody it. From the way he carried himself to the way he lived his life.

She spotted three or four more lines on his face that weren't etched in her mind and there was more salt than pepper now in his hair now. But aside from those minute details, her memories had been strikingly accurate.

Except for the way his dark eyes probed hers now. The way he looked at her now was entirely different. Sure there'd been fights and times when he was angry and frustrated with her, but this...this was something entirely new.

Dimitri Marick had never been able to hide the depth of his love for her. No one before him had ever looked at her the way he did. Never had anyone been as content to love her and as proud to be by her side as he was. Dimitri's love for her had always been so obvious it was almost palpable and in turn, loving him had felt like the most natural thing in the world.

Even now, when the prospect of a relationship no longer terrified her, the thought of being with someone else had never entered her mind.

_Because I can't imagine being with anyone else. No one could ever make me feel the way you do. _

His love was one of the few things in life she never doubted.

Until now.

Now there were so many other emotions written on his transparent face. Some of which she'd never thought she see. At least not when he was looking at her.

Anger. Disbelief. Betrayal. Disappointment.

"So Hayward told the truth for a change. Here you are, Alex. Alive and well in Vancouver."

Alex swallowed. "Why don't you come inside?"

She debated offering him a cup of tea until she reminded herself of the ridiculousness of it all.

_He didn't come here for an afternoon of neighbourly gossip over scones and cream. _

"Do you want to have a seat?"

"No." He shook his head and this time the only emotion she caught was anger. "I want to know why you left us. I mean, is it safe for me to be here? Is there some terrorist lurking around the corner that would explain your clandestine departure?"

Alex shook her head. This was going to hurt, she realized. Even more than she imagined.

"No..." she said softly.

"You're alright? You didn't have a sudden case of amnesia after you left Moscow?"

"I'm alright, yes," her voice sounded even stranger to her now than when she first opened the door.

"So there was no reason you couldn't pick up a phone and let your son and your husband know that you were alive?"

"No..."

_"No?" _

Alex felt the hot sting of tears on her cheeks now, falling down in spite of her fighting them back. "I mean...no, it's not that simple."

"Then why, Alex?"

His voice softened at the sight of her tears, making her feel manipulative. She brushed them away.

"Why the hell haven't you told us you're alright?"

Hurt. That was the only thing she saw in his eyes now.

And she wanted nothing more than to find a way to take it away.

_You're the last person in the world I'd ever want to hurt. _

"What do you want me say?"

_Tell me what I need to say and I'll say it. Anything for you not to look at me this way._

Dimitri looked at her in disbelief. "What do I _want _you to say? I don't know...the truth is a good start."

"I was pregnant when I left Moscow."

Dimitri took a step back. "You what...?"

"The doctor at the hospital in Moscow told me I was pregnant..."

The hurt was mixed with disbelief now. "You were pregnant? _With our child_?"

She shook her head, not sure she'd be able to say it aloud. "No..."

Comprehension dawned on him and she thought she saw his face lose a touch of colour. "Maybe I will take a seat..."

"I slept with Faison hoping to gain his trust." She hadn't been able to tell him then, and even now, more than two years later, it was just as impossibly hard.

_But if anyone deserves the truth, it's you. _

"I see..." he managed. For the first time since entering her home, his eyes stopped meeting hers.

"I'm sorry." Alex wiped away more tears with the back of her hand. "I'm so sorry..."

He took a deep breath, struggling with his own words now. And this time she sensed the anger he fought back wasn't directed at her. "You did...you did what it took to get away from that monster. I don't blame you for that, Alex. But I don't understand...I don't understand why you wouldn't trust me enough to tell me that. Wouldn't trust that I loved you enough that it wouldn't matter."

"_I_ couldn't cope with what I did," she admitted. "Much less with the result."

"So you ran away."

"I went away to get an abortion. I planned to come back after it was done and forget it ever happened..."

Dimitri ran a hand through his hair and loosened his expensive tie. "But...?"

Then his words were cut off when Liam came running into the room. "Mommy...come see Thomas on TV!"

Dimitri eyed her son, dumbfounded as Liam tugged at her skirt.

"Not now, sweetie," Alex whispered.

Maria came running after him, chattering in Spanish as she picked him up and carried him out of the room.

"He's...?" Dimitri was the one who was speechless now.

"I couldn't go through with it," was all she said. "His name is Liam. He's two years old."

"_Faison's son_?"

Alex nodded. "I ran away to get an abortion. Then, when I couldn't do it, I stayed away to protect him from his father."

It was the truth, simplified. Not the whole truth. Not by a long shot. But it was what she could muster at the moment.

"I see..."

Alex saw him struggle to make sense of it all. She didn't blame him. How would she react if the tables were turned?

"You're sure?"

"Sure?"

"That he's _Faison's_ son?"

"Yes...I'm quite certain."

"Quite?" Dimitri paused and this time she couldn't read his eyes at all. "Is there a chance he could be...?"

"I fell off a horse on Faison's estate...the odds of an early stage pregnancy surviving that kind of fall...they're...they're next to impossible."

He straightened his back. "But not _impossible_?"

"Dimitri..." This wasn't a road she wanted to take him down. "It's highly,_ highly_ unlikely."

"You haven't had a DNA test then?"

"No. Because I didn't think..."

"If there's a chance, no matter how small, that your child...could be _my_ child. Did it never occur to you that I might have a right to know?"

_You have no idea how much I want him to be yours. No idea. _

"He's not your son, Dimitri."

"But you don't know that with absolute certainty?"

Alex's hands fiddled nervously with her belt buckle. "With absolute certainty? No."

He stood up and straightened his tie. His gaze was cold. "I'd like to know, Alex. _With absolute certainty_."

"You want me to do a DNA test?"

"Yes, I want you to take a DNA test."

Alex nodded. "Alright...if that's what you want."

_Even if the results will disappoint you all over again._

"Maybe I didn't have the right to expect you to trust me the way I trusted you..."

"It was never about a lack of trust."

He wouldn't let her finish. "Or the right to think that maybe what we had was strong enough to overcome even what happened on that damn estate in Russia...but I do have the right to know if the child you've decided to raise on the other side of the world is mine, don't you think?"

She nodded. "Yes...you do."

He pulled out a business card and wrote a number on the back of it. "This is the hotel where I'm staying. Seeing as you've forgotten my cell phone number. I'd like to do the test as soon as possible. Let me know what you need from me."

Alex nodded. She couldn't speak anymore, her throat felt tight. Constricted.

It was done.

He was going to leave.

His gaze lingered on her and for a moment she thought that maybe he wanted to say something else.

_Say it, please. Yell, curse, be angry, break something...anything but this. _

She couldn't remember wanting anything as much as she wanted his arms around her now.

_Give me one sign that you still feel something.. _

She couldn't bring herself to move a single step in his direction.

"Goodbye, Alex."

He turned around and closed the door behind him before she had a chance to try.

Alex knew it would hurt to see him again. But she never imagined it would hurt this much.

Or that she still had so much left to lose.

She didn't bother holding back the tears as she leaned against the door.

* * *

Authors note: As usual big thanks to my awesome proofreaders and general sounding boards, Annie and Kel.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

_Vancouver, Canada_

* * *

It was raining now. A heavy, angry downpour that showed no signs of letting up anytime soon.

Traffic was still moving at a steady pace and Dimitri Marick was starting to think he'd taken a wrong turn somewhere. That maybe he shouldn't be on this highway at all.

He was heading out of the city rather than into it.

_What does it matter? It's not as though I have to be somewhere. _

He kept driving, keeping pace with the flow of traffic as his windshield wipers worked furiously to keep his vision clear. He was oblivious to his surroundings. Green signs flashed by with the names of streets and places that meant nothing to him.

He'd exit and turn around at some point. Maybe even turn on the GPS.

But not yet.

For now, he kept driving aimlessly.

_Why don't you look for a lab that can do a DNA test? _

Dimitri bit his lip in response to his cynical thought. So hard that it started to bleed. The acrid taste in his mouth was a good match for the bitterness he felt.

Alex was alive and well. For over two years, he wanted nothing more than that, and as soon as he got his wish all he felt was anger and bitterness.

_The thing I remember most about seeing you again is standing there and demanding a DNA test. How sad is that? _

No, that wasn't entirely true. His most vivid memory was having her stand so close to him it took all his willpower to not wrap his arms around her. Seeing her had nearly taken his breath away. It reminded him of their last night together in Paris, when they ate dinner at a candlelit table and danced to Edith Piaf. Her hair was long again, like it was that night in Paris, before she'd cut it all off in a moment of irrational impulse at that hospital in Moscow. He wanted to run his fingers through it, the way he used to.

He used to think he could forgive her anything.

Anything, except deciding to leave him because she didn't trust him with the truth.

_I wanted to come here and have you tell me that you had no choice. That there was some threat hanging over your head that would explain it. That maybe you were too ill to know what you were doing... _

What neither his pride nor his heart could accept was her standing across from him, healthy and well, telling him that it was a decision she made entirely of her own volition. A decision which she still considered the right one.

_But if you'd come here and found her unwell, then you'd want nothing more than for her to be alright._

It was all so absurd.

Alex _was _alright and instead of gratitude, he only felt betrayal and anger.

_You promised Andrei to pass on his message to her. To tell her he loved her and missed her. And you didn't even do that._

Dimitri exhaled. The anger was gone now, it left as quickly as it had taken possession of him earlier, leaving him empty, tired and chilled to the bone. Even the jet lag was starting to catch up to him now.

He turned on the heat in the car.

_It would never have hurt as much if I didn't love her so much._

Their encounter this morning wasn't so much a reunion as it was one big condemnation.

_I'm sorry, Alex. _

It was his last thought before he saw a pickup truck from the oncoming lane veer halfway into his.

Dimitri swerved to avoid hitting him, but it was too late.

The truck made contact with his rental car and sent him fish-tailing into the busy lane beside him.

After that, he was plunged into a black, silent nothingness.

_Ritz Carlton Sanya, Hainan Island, South China _

* * *

Cesar Faison yawned.

It was a glorious day outside. His suite had sliding glass doors that gave him a magnificent view of the deep blue South China Sea, framed by several lush, green islands.

The hotel brochure lying on his bedside table wasn't lying. Everything about the panorama outside was as stunning as the pictures promised. There was no photo-shopping in those photos.

Faison closed the glass doors and yanked the drapes over it, blocking it all from his view.

At first he thought coming here had been a good idea, and from a business standpoint it probably still was. He'd driven six of the most influential members of the New Haikou Port authority from Hainan here in a stretch limousine yesterday. Away from the island's busy, industrial north to Sanya, a town on the scenic south shore which was lined with five-star resorts, of which Faison had taken care to choose the best. Or rather he'd entrusted Jan Holstrom with the task.

In the past he'd treated the same men to ridiculously expensive dinners in Haikou.

But this time he wanted to give them something that would make their future co-operation a given.

A weekend at the Ritz. Five-star meals, Thai massages, cocktails on the beach and views that would take their breath away. He'd even asked for Jan to arrange escorts for them last night. Five had asked for women and one wanted a man. The boy that Jan had found for him wasn't really old enough to be called a man. Nor were the women anything but girls.

Faison didn't care.

He wanted the officials satisfied and judging from their expressions at the lavish breakfast buffet this morning they were. One of them even giggled as his chubby hands reached over to refill his plate with smoked salmon and capers.

'Good,' he thought. He knew he'd have a lot of sensitive cargo coming into the East from Europe this year. He needed it to pass through the port of Haikou without any questions, problems or red tape, and these men would make it happen.

"What about my satisfaction?" he asked himself aloud. He could have arranged for a girl for himself too, as he sometimes did. It would certainly have satisfied some immediate needs. But he didn't. Because every time he did, the morning after left him feeling emptier than he cared to.

_I want someone who wants me._

Faison frowned. He had few moments of self pity or sentimentality. But looking out at the spectacular scenery from his room had touched a nerve. Today was supposed to be a celebration of his success with the port officials. His success in sustaining a dangerous lifestyle that had killed many lesser men. In spending his days and nights in the kind of lavish suites that most people in this world would never be able to afford.

But in reality, it was just one more magnificent moment spent alone.

_What's a view of paradise if no one looks at it with you?_

There were occasions, moments of unexpected weakness, when he debated trying to contact Anna Devane again. Against all logic, he still yearned for her and he was slowly coming to terms with the fact that he likely would until the day he died.

_I might have stood a chance with her, if things could have gone according to plan two years ago. If I could have convinced her that it was my determination to come up with an antidote that saved her daughter's life. _

_If she never found out that I gave Leah that virus and instead believed that I was the one who saved her life, then, yes, she would have looked at me in a whole new light..._

"Then maybe she'd be here with me, looking out into the South China Sea," he whispered aloud. "Then I'd have the drapes wide open."

That said, even he wasn't deluded enough to think he still stood a chance with Anna. Not after he kidnapped her twin sister.

"Not just kidnapped," he mumbled, irritated with himself. "_Mutilated_."

Maybe in hindsight, branding her hadn't been the best idea. But his momentary rage hadn't allowed himself to think of the consequences back then. He only knew he had to show Alexandra Marick that he couldn't let her take him for a fool _and_ let her get away with it. She had to pay a price.

He'd briefly thought of killing her too. But that wasn't really an option given her relation to Anna.

"You've probably done the job for me yourself, haven't you, Doctor Marick?"

Cesar Faison was convinced that Alexandra's disappearance from the face of the Earth meant she had killed herself. God knows she was plenty unhinged even back then at Alexei Estate. He'd learned from Charlotte Devane, her mother, that she spent considerable time in a mental institution. The trauma at Alexei Estate had probably been the straw that broke the camel's back.

_Given how Anna thinks, she likely blames me for her sister's death. Even though nothing is further from the truth. I can't be held responsible for the actions of others. _

He exhaled, deeply unhappy at how everything had unfolded and hating that he still thought about it. Often.

He frowned as he looked down at the pile of newspapers that Jan had asked the concierge to print for him. He read as many as five papers a day and he hated the abbreviated versions that could be found on the Internet. It was a hobby that was slowly becoming an obsession. He didn't just read the headline stories or the business section. Faison devoured it all, from global stock market indexes, to obituaries, to scores from local tennis tournaments and photo snapshots on the gossip pages.

The world's best hotels had newspaper machines that were capable of printing out daily issues of countless papers in their entirety.

Five of them now lay on his desk. One of them was in Mandarin.

That too was another recent obsession of his. The attempt to master a language that was quite possibly more difficult than any of the others he already spoke.

He sat down, lit a cigar and started to read. Forcing his mind to erase all other thoughts. No matter how hard it was.

_Vancouver, Canada_

* * *

Alex felt Maria's hands on her shoulders.

"Alejandra, are you okay?"

Alex shook her head and wiped away the tears from her cheeks. If she looked anything like she felt, she was probably a mess. "No."

Maria sat down next to her on the couch and handed her a box of tissues.

Alex took it gratefully. "Thanks..."

"Did he hurt you?"

Alex blew her nose. "I hurt him first."

Maria gave her a lopsided smile. "So it was his turn?"

"Something like that."

"Is he Liam's father?"

"No."

"Oh..." Maria turned away and grabbed another tissue for her. "I see."

"It's complicated."

"I see that too."

"Is Liam okay?"

Maria waved an arm into the air. "Of course! He is watching that train show he loves so much."

"Good."

"Do you still love him?"

Alex eyed her. "Liam?"

"No...silly." Maria sighed. "Your husband. The one you never tell me about. The one who came here today and who is now making you use all the Kleenex we have."

Alex managed a smile this time too, as she pulled another one from the box, wiping away the last tear. "I do. I never stopped."

"But you never saw him for more than two years?"

"It's crazy, isn't it?"

"He found you because of that other man who came here last week?"

"Yes." Alex tossed a tissue into the waste basket. "Jerk."

"Maybe it is for the best. Honesty is good, no?"

"Being ready for it is good too."

"Is there anything I can do, _mi hija_?"

Alex debated the question. A few months ago she would have begged to be left alone. To crawl into a corner and lick her wounds on her own. "I could take a hug. And a really good paella."

Maria smiled and obliged with a long, warm embrace. The kind she might have gotten from a mother who loved her. It felt good. So did the fact that Maria knew better than to ask her any more questions.

Maria handed her a twenty dollar bill. "If you want the paella, you still have to get the mussels."

The remark made Alex laugh. "God, you're heartless."

The old woman gave her a kiss on the forehead. "You will thank me for it when you taste it. "

_Kigali, Rwanda_

* * *

Anna Devane stood in front of the pretty suburban home and took a deep breath.

It was an ordinary home, with walls in pastel colours, and a small, well-kept front yard, complete with a smiling garden gnome.

Anna frowned, suppressing an urge to kick the gnome right through the window.

_All these years, Robin and I mourned you. My daughter had to forge a life without her parents, while I tried to remember who I was. All this time, you knew. You were in Africa and you knew! But instead of telling us, you went on with your life in a pretty, gated suburb that might as well be in Florida._

_There's no reason in the world good enough to justify what you did..._

"Who's to say he's lived here all this time..." Anna reminded herself aloud.

She moved a hand over her brows to block out the bright sunlight when she saw the front door of the house open.

Robert Scorpio stepped out of the house and right into her view. "Hi, Anna."

Anna would be lying to herself if she said she was entirely prepared for all the emotions that ran through her when she saw him. Living and breathing, his kind blue eyes looking at her just as they'd done twenty years ago.

She hadn't expected him to have changed so little. Hadn't expected him to look at her as though she still meant the world to him. Sure, he didn't stand quite as tall as he did then, and there was more gray than anything else in his hair, but aside from a few extra lines in his face, he looked good. Strong, firm, kind, unflappable Robert. The man who'd move mountains to keep his family safe.

She swallowed, hating that she could barely contain her anger. "So Robin did call you."

He gave a wry smile and there was even a hint of mischief in his blue eyes. That too, was exactly as she remembered it. "No...it was the guard at the front gate. He'd be in trouble if he didn't."

"I guess you have him under control too. Like the rest of your family."

"Anna...I know you're angry. I know this doesn't make sense."

"Why don't you try?" she prompted him. "Try making sense of it for me?"

His hand pointed towards the door of his house. "Why don't you come inside? It's hot as hell out here. The midday sun is the worst."

Anna shook her head. "Sorry...I don't feel like seeing Sandrine right now."

"Look, this isn't her fault..."

"She worked closely with Sean and myself two years ago, Robert._ Closely_."

Robert said nothing and Anna gave him an unyielding look. "Did you threaten to kill her if she told us?"

"Of course not..."

"Well, then. As a free-thinking adult, telling us the truth had to have been an option for her at one point. One she chose not to take."

"She had no idea whether I was still alive when she came to see you in Paris."

Anna wanted to ball her hand into a fist. How many ways could he find to justify his manipulations? She suddenly felt a twinge of pity for Sandrine Mutanga.

"She knew you were alive before she came to see us," Anna shot back. "And she _certainly_ knew you were alive when she saw you in Moscow and decided to disappear on us! I assume she also knew you were alive the last two years." She took a deep breath. "So, unless you've brainwashed her, do both me and Sandrine a favour and stop defending her."

"For what it's worth..." he said softly, squinting his eyes in the bright sunlight. "She wanted me to tell you. She made me go to Paris to see you."

Anna looked at him in disbelief. "But you didn't."

Robert didn't say anything.

Anna swallowed. "So you're a liar _and_ a coward."

Robert didn't say anything in his defense.

"In the years immediately following the explosion," she pressed. "Did you know I was alive?"

Robert nodded. "I knew, yes. I knew that you were safe in Canada. That was enough..."

_No, it wasn't enough. _

Anna felt angry tears welling up in her eyes. Bitter anger for all the years she lost and would never be able to get back again. Years that she now realized didn't have to be what they were.

"It was hell," she said softly. "Not knowing who I was. Trying to remember...all these years. Worst of all, when I did remember, the most terrible thing was knowing that my daughter had to grow up without her mother only because_ I_ couldn't remember her."

"Anna..."

"And now?" Anna glared at him in with the kind of rage she hadn't felt in a long time. "Now I find out that you _knew_? That you could have reunited us all these years ago? _But you chose not to_?"

"I didn't know..."

"You didn't know what?" Anna glared at him. "Didn't know that Robin was hanging out with likes of Sonny Corinthos and his buddies when she was a teenager? That maybe if we'd been there that damn mob might never have ruled Port Charles the way it does now? That maybe, just maybe...if we'd been there for her, _she wouldn't have HIV today_!"

She didn't care that there were tears streaming down her face, or that Robert was taking the hits like a man. The guilt and regret were suddenly written all over his face and he made no effort to defend his choices.

"I want to know why," she demanded. "What in the world could possibly be worth making the kind of deal that you supposedly made with Faison?"

"_You _were," he said softly. "You and Robin."

"I don't understand, Robert."

"I thought..." his voice sounded foreign to her now. "That if you were willing to die to keep him out of our lives. To protect me and our daughter, then I should be willing to do the same."

"Willing to die?" Anna frowned. None of this was making sense. One thing Robert was right about was the blinding heat. The sun shone down mercilessly as they stood under the open skies of his front yard.

Robert looked at her quizzically. "You set the explosion on that ship, knowing you'd be on it when it went off, didn't you? It's why you warned me to get off as soon as you saw me."

"What?" Every thing he said made less sense.

_'You set the explosion on that ship.'_

Of course she couldn't have set the explosion. That would've been...suicide.

Robert looked at her as though he suddenly understood something she didn't. "Wait a minute...you don't remember, do you?" He took two steps towards her, putting a hand on her arm. "I'm sorry...I thought your memory was back...that it was complete. It never occurred to me that you might not know."

Anna brushed his arm off brusquely. "What the hell are you saying?"

"Anna, please...come inside. Let's sit down. Let me explain..."

The world suddenly felt as though it was spinning around her. She closed her eyes for a moment. Willing herself to go back to that day. Forcing herself to remember.

_The tanker sitting in a harbour in Venezuela. The smell of oil in the air. The relentless heat on that hulk of steel. Robert running towards her. _

Everything that happened immediately afterwards was still so hazy in her mind. Eventually she'd stopping pushing herself to remember because it hurt. Literally. For reasons that even neurologists like her brilliant sister couldn't explain.

But now she needed to know. Because she refused to believe a word of what Robert was telling her.

"Anna?" He looked at her with concern.

"You can explain right here..." she managed.

_She was walking along the top of the tanker. No, not walking. Faison's hand had gripped her arm and he was pushing her across. It was then that she saw him in the distance. Robert. _

_"No! Robert! No!"_

She felt a dull, pounding pain in her head. The usual reaction.

_Seeing him hadn't been a relief. It had terrified her. _

_She'd called out to him. To warn him. Before the explosion. _

_How could I have known what was going to happen before it happened? Unless..._

She pressed a hand against her forehead. It was getting worse quickly. Why in the world would did it always hurt to remember?

Robert held his hand out to her, as if she might sway if he didn't steady her. "I really think we should go inside and sit down."

Anna pushed her fingernails into the palm of her hand. One pain could block out the other. She shook her head, ignoring his offer, composing herself instead as her eyes met his. "You're saying _I_ set the explosion on the tanker?"

"Anna, please..."

_"Answer me, damn it!" _

"Yes," Robert told her. "I think you set the explosion on that ship."

"How...how would you know that?"

"I suspected, when I realized you were yelling at me to get off the tanker as soon as you saw me. When I saw the way you looked at me..."

Anna raised her brows, cutting him off. "You suspected?" He was wrong. Anna was sure of it. She couldn't have been the one to set in motion a series of events that would change all their lives forever.

"I suspected and then Faison confirmed it for me."

"He confirmed it?"

"He came to see me at the hospital afterwards. Saying you were the one who was responsible for the pain he was in. I didn't understand what he meant then either. But he told me he had some of his men examine the debris. That he was certain it was your...handiwork. He reminded me that incendiary devices were your speciality. If you wanted to get to him, that's exactly the method you'd choose."

His words sounded far away now.

_Was it really possible? _

"Faison told me something else...he said that I didn't really know what you were capable of. But that he did. He told me you tricked him into believing you wanted to be with him...before you tried to kill him."

"And you believed him?"

"I believed him because he said it made him realize he was a fool to think you'd ever fall in love with him. In the end, I believed him...because he agreed to the deal." Robert looked at her tenderly. "He never would have if... if he thought there was any possibility that you didn't do it. If he thought he still had a chance."

_'He told me...that I didn't really know what you were capable of.'_

"I'm sorry, luv." Robert looked at her like he used to. "Sorry...you had to find out this way."

Anna hadn't known what to expect when she came here today but she didn't expect this.

_I used to blame myself for all the wrong choices I made. All the choices that led up to that day on the tanker. But one thing I could always blame Faison for was the explosion that destroyed everything. _

_But even that's my fault. _

Anna swallowed. She felt nauseous now, as the guilt and the pain threatened to swallow her alive.

She wanted to get away. Away from Robert. Away from the blinding heat.

Away from herself.

Anna wiped away a tear, as Robert looked at her, the worry lines deepening around his eyes.

"I think..." she mumbled. "I think I've heard enough."

She turned away from him, away from his pretty suburban home.

"Anna, don't leave like this." Robert ran after her, and he was at her side now, his hands on her shoulders. "Where are you going to go?"

"Somewhere..."

His grip on her shoulders tightened. "This has been a shock for you, I can see that. Let me drive you back to Robin's hotel."

Anna stopped in her tracks. Her gaze was ice cold. "Let me go."

His hand dropped from her shoulders and he nodded, understanding. "Alright..."

He didn't follow her anymore as she walked away from the house, back towards the main gate.

She wasn't sure where exactly she was headed, but she knew what she had to do.

* * *

Big, huge thanks to my two awesome editors Annie and Kel, who try to curb my typos and my excessive love of commas. :) And of course to the patient readers who are still reading this!


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

_Vancouver General Hospital, Vancouver _

* * *

Dimitri Marick rubbed his eyes.

The exhaustion was almost oppressive now. The adrenaline rush that sustained him earlier was long gone and it took considerable willpower not to give in to his need for sleep.

Dimitri did allow himself to close his eyes as he thought back to the events that landed him here. Sitting on a stretcher in a crowded hospital hallway.

Dimitri remembered losing consciousness as his rental car spun around like a toy and smashed into a guardrail. He knew he couldn't have been out for long, because everything about the carnage he woke up to was fresh. There were people screaming, cars wedged into others in ways that he couldn't have imagined possible. The smell of gasoline permeated his nostrils and there was smoke everywhere, mingling with the moist Pacific Coast air.

The driver's side of his car was smashed and it pressed against his body. As was the airbag that made him feel as though he was suffocating. Dimitri remembered reaching into his pocket for his Swiss Army knife. Remembered opening it and stabbing it into the airbag for relief.

Those movements were the ones that made him realize he was hurt. That his entire left side was in pain and that a steady trickle of blood ran down his arm. The driver's side window was broken and Dimitri suspected some of the glass had struck him and cut him.

Getting out of the car was a struggle but he was relived to find he could stand and that his arm didn't seem to be broken. One glance into the side view mirror, now dangling loosely from the car, told him he had a bloody cut running down the left side of his face too.

He didn't have time to digest any of it.

An Asian woman with bloodstained clothes ran towards him almost as soon as he got out, pleading for help in getting her father out of the wreck that was her car.

Much of what happened afterwards was a blur too.

Dimitri vaguely remembered pulling the old man out of the car with the help of another man. He also remembered using his designer tie as a makeshift tourniquet on the man's leg until finally, thankfully, the sound of sirens filled the smoky air, signalling the arrival of help.

A mix of blood and rain ran down his face when he moved away from the chaos on the highway and sat down on a guardrail that was still in one piece. Judging from what he could see it involved over a dozen cars, some of which were in a much worse state than his own. He spotted an over-turned tractor-trailer too. Traffic had come to a complete standstill in all lanes and he saw that several people were hysterical, crying and sobbing even if they didn't appear to be injured.

Dimitri wondered whether his military training was to thank for his own calm. Much as he'd once hated it, back when he was young and hot-headed and vehemently opposed to serving a regime that he despised, he was grateful for it today. While others had been helpless and hysterical, he'd known what to do and how to help, without giving it a moment's thought.

One of the paramedics had commended him, even insisting he receive recognition for his efforts, but the thought made Dimitri cringe.

_No. I'm not a hero. I don't feel like one. _

A young policeman had come by and taken a statement from him before sticking him into an ambulance and now he was here, sitting in a hospital hallway, waiting until those with worse injuries than his had been taken care of. Based on the sheer volume of patients and frantic relatives, Dimitri guessed that the bulk of the accident victims had been brought to this hospital. There were several others, like him, stuck out in the hallway on a stretcher, waiting to be looked at.

He could see a TV screen showing the news. The multiple car pile-up was the story of the evening. He strained his ears to hear the broadcast. Something about a drunk driver. A twelve-year old boy killed. Three others in critical condition.

Dimitri winced.

_What a tragic, senseless mess. _

And he got caught in the middle of it. All because he'd taken a wrong turn somewhere.

_Next time turn on the GPS._

Dimitri pushed himself off the stretcher and stood on unsteady legs.

"Sir, please. It's better you lie down. I know you're uncomfortable but..." someone told him.

"I ...need to use the restroom," he lied.

The woman wearing scrubs who stood next to him pointed him towards a sign that said _WC_.

Dimitri nodded in thanks. His legs felt steadier after a couple of steps.

He stared at himself in the washroom mirror, frowning at the sight. A paramedic had fixed up the cuts on his face and arm, so he was no longer bleeding, but the rest of him wasn't pretty. There were thick bloodstains on his shirt collar and his expensive suit was wrecked.

His entire left side throbbed and he could have used something for the pain. But that too was something he could deal with. He suspected that his injuries were superficial. They'd leave him sore and bruised but not much else.

More than anything he wanted a bed and a shower.

And even more than_ that_, he wanted her.

He left the men's room and walked towards a police officer questioning someone in the waiting room. He pulled out a business card from his wallet and handed it to him.

"If you need to contact me for anything else," Dimitri told him.

The officer stood up. "Sir, you were in the pile-up. I saw you pulling that man out of the car...I'm sure someone would love to thank..."

Dimitri cut him off. "I'd like to leave if you don't need me here for any further statements."

"You're hurt," the officer told him. "You should to see a doctor."

Dimitri shook his head. "I don't need a doctor. I need my wife."

"Can we call her?"

"No, I..." Dimitri paused. Telling him he didn't know the number wouldn't make it seem like he was fit to leave the hospital of his own volition. "I'd prefer to go home. If you can...call me a taxi. I'd appreciate that."

The officer said something to the person he'd been speaking to and then walked to the Emergency room entrance with Dimitri. "Yeah, sure. I can do that."

_Pine Valley, Pennsylvania _

* * *

"Look," David Hayward sighed. "I think if you're going to use her as a consultant you should pay her what she's worth. The lack of credentials, no prior reputation...who cares? Has she come through for you or hasn't she? Well, then...base it on that."

Levy Rosenberg went on about how being part of his latest project was an honour in itself. A huge opportunity for an unknown and struggling researcher.

David bit his tongue.

_Yeah, I bet Alex Devane, global pioneer in stem cell research, is thrilled to be your sounding board._

He reminded himself that Levy had no clue who she was. "I agree, you're giving her a chance, a chance on a nobody, but I'm just saying if you're going to keep using her...I don't know, judge her and pay her based on what she's contributed. And when someone else tries to snatch her up maybe she'll keep that in mind."

_"Are you kidding me?"_ Levy laughed on the other end. _"I don't run a charity here. Government funding and good intentions aside, this is a business like any other. You know that." _

David sighed a second time. It was a lost cause. And the irony of it all was that, a few years ago, he would have reacted the exact same way. If he had an eager young researcher desperate to break through the ranks, willing to give him something for next to nothing, why not take advantage of it? _He_ was always more than willing to reap in the acclaim and the glory. "You're right," he admitted. "You did me a favour and I found out what I needed. You deserve whatever you get out of it."

_"Exactly." _

David ended the call with a frown_. Sorry, Alex. I tried._

He really should have given her a call too. To let her know he'd told Dimitri her whereabouts. But he wasn't sure he was ready for _that _conversation. Or even whether Dimitri had done anything with the information.

David rubbed his temple. He used to be a firm believer that it was a dog eat dog world out there. That only the strong survived and that the sooner you learned that lesson, the better.

He walked into the living room and saw Maggie and Leah's faces etched in concentration, looking for the right pieces of the giant unfinished puzzle they had stretched across the dining room table. They moved the guinea pig cage into the living room too, so Ruben could join them.

_Or do we just spout clichés about it being a cruel world in order to justify our own cruel actions? _

He didn't want Leah growing up in that kind of world. He wanted others to treat her kindly and fairly. And for her to do the same.

Becoming a father had changed him. In ways he could never have imagined.

That was _his _family he was looking at now and it filled him with a contentment that was hard to describe. If only his brother was still around to see it. David had a feeling Leo would have adored his namesake niece.

Maggie raised her head to look at him. "Ooh...look at you. All handsome and all, with suit and tie and shiny black shoes. You almost make me want to switch sides."

David laughed. "Is that all it takes, a suit? Wait until you see me in a speedo."

"Oh god...stop it. I just ate." Maggie laughed. "I think _that_ might make Anna switch sides."

"She'd have to be here for that, wouldn't she?" David fastened his colourful tie. "Tell me again why I'm letting you stay here and eat all my food while you insult me all day long?"

"Because..." Maggie handed Leah a puzzle piece. "Because I'm family and you have no choice and I'm also an awesome babysitter."

"That you are," David agreed.

"So why the get up?" Maggie asked him. "Are you going on a date?"

"Funny."

"No, seriously."

"I have a consultation with a patient's family."

"Did Anna teach you to get all dolled up for that?"

"No, her sister actually. Alex used to believe that if you cared enough to look good for your patients, it gave them the sense that you gave a damn about their well-being too. She also believed that the more faith they had in you as a doctor the better their chances for recovery."

"Hmm..." Maggie pursed her lips, pensive. "I think I like that idea." She smirked. "Unless you look too good...then it would make me think my doc cared more about his clothes than me."

"It's hard, you know, for me not to look too good," he shot back with a grin. "It's one of the very few ideas I stole from Alex Devane. Compared to the many she no doubt copied from me."

"Of course. But aren't most of your patients out cold by the time you get to them?"

"I do see them before and after, you know."

"It_ is_ amazing what you do for a living," Maggie told him, with a sudden sincerity that surprised him. "You literally hold people's hearts and lives in your hands. I guess they do have to trust you."

"It's an incredible, beautiful job," he admitted. Sometimes it took someone like Maggie to remind him.

"Any word from Anna?"

"She called shortly after arriving in Kigali. To let me know she finally got there."

The phone rang right after he answered her question. David sat down to answer it, only to have Leah crawl up into his lap as soon as he did. "Long distance..." he told Maggie. "This may be a case of speaking of the devil."

"Anna?"

_"Not quite,"_ was the answer on the other end.

David smiled at the sound of Robin's voice. "Hi, sweetheart. How are you feeling?"

_"Much better. Thanks. It's amazing what a few days of doing nothing but sleeping and eating can do for you." _

"I'll have to make that a regular prescription then."

Robin laughed. _"You should." _

"Just make sure you don't let your mother cook for you. And make sure you don't tell her I said that."

_"David?" _

Her voice suddenly sounded serious. "Yes?"

_"There's something I need to tell you. Something I needed to tell Mom before I could tell you." _

David looked at Maggie, who was trying to follow the conversation by listening to his end of it and watching his reactions.

"What is it, Robin?"

_"It's going to sound crazy." _

"Are you _sure_ you're okay?"

_"Yes, yes...I'm fine. It's not me. It's...David, I don't know how to say this but...my Dad's alive." _

David grasped the phone a little tighter. "What?"

_"It's a long story...but I'll try to give you the short version. Do you remember Sandrine Mutanga in Paris, the WSB agent from the DRC who came to help Mom and Sean?" _

David's mouth felt dry. "Yeah...I remember her."

_"She was really looking for Dad, who'd gone after Faison thinking he'd kidnapped Mom. All this time, after the boat explosion, Dad had made this crazy deal with Faison that promised he'd stay away from us, if Faison promised to stay away from us too. But then, when Faison kidnapped Mom, well, it wasn't actually Mom, of course, but Dad thought it was, so the deal was off." _

Robin sounded breathless and David had a hard time following her. Had a hard time focusing on any thought but one.

_Robert Scorpio was alive? _

"What?"

_"I know it's all kinds of crazy complicated. But, what I'm trying to say is he's alive, David. My Dad's alive!" _

"Robert Scorpio's alive..." he mouthed, watching Maggie's eyes widen in response. He swallowed, composing himself. "Sweetheart, that's amazing news. I'm...really happy for you."

Robin paused_. "It wasn't exactly a warm and fuzzy reunion or anything. He had a lot of explaining to do. But the more it's sinking in, the more I feel like it's this incredible gift. One I'd never ever thought I'd get. Not in this lifetime anyway." _

"It is...incredible."

_"You understand then why I asked Mom to come here. I couldn't tell her over the phone." _

David took a deep breath.

_"David...?" _

"Yeah, of course, I understand, sweetheart," he lied. Truthfully, he didn't understand. Just as he didn't quite understand what he was feeling right now. "So, your Mom...she knows?"

_"Yeah, I just told her. She went to see him_."

"I see..." Anna knew already and it didn't occur to her to call him?

_"I wanted you to know as well, David." _

"Thanks, Robin. And..."

"_What?"_

"Will you make sure your Mom's okay?"

_"Of course."_

"Will you also ask her to give me a call?"

_"Sure. And David, I just want you to know...having my Dad back, doesn't mean I love you any less."_

David took a deep breath. "I know. I love you too, sweetheart. And...I'm really happy for you. This is incredible and you're going to have to tell me the whole story when you come back here."

_"I should go...I ordered some room service and I think he's at the door." _

"Robin... Take care of yourself too okay?"

_"Will do! Give Leah a big kiss for me!" _

David hung up and felt his shoulders slump.

"_Holy cow_!" Maggie exclaimed. "Did I hear what I just thought I heard? Did Robin call to tell your her Dad's alive? Robert Scorpio, big WSB hero who died when he tried to rescue Anna from the clutches of some madman?"

David raised his brows. "Yeah, that's the one."

"Wow," Maggie looked at him in disbelief. "That is crazy. Did she say..._why_? Was he on some super secret mission for twenty years?"

"Who's Robert?" Leah piped in.

"Robin's dad," David told her, holding her closer.

Leah giggled, as if he'd told a joke. "No...you're her dad!"

He didn't have to correct her. She was already pre-occupied as she caught the perfect fit for one of the puzzle pieces. Sometimes her five-second attention span was a blessing.

"What does it mean for you and Anna?" Maggie asked softly. "Robert being back. Wasn't she married to him when he, you know, died."

David shrugged his shoulders. He didn't want to know what it meant. Surely a marriage was void and null after the husband spent years playing dead?

_It's not the legalities I care about, it's Anna's reaction to it all._

"Things are cool with you and Anna, aren't they?" Maggie asked him, looking as serious as he'd seen her since she got here.

_Well, we had a big fight before she left for Africa. I hurt her when I found her sister and didn't tell her. She thinks that I'm trying to run her life and control her, when all I want to do is keep her safe. Oh, and she can't seem to muster any enthusiasm for our wedding which is coming up in a couple of months._

David held on to Leah, kissing the top of her head. "Yeah. Things are cool."

_Vancouver, Canada _

* * *

"Do you mind.." Dimitri winced. "Driving a little smoother?" The bumpy cab ride was more painful than he'd expected.

Maybe leaving the hospital wasn't the best idea after all.

_Who's to say she wants to see you after what happened this morning?_

He'd pulled the piece of paper with her address out of his suit pocket at the hospital and given it to the impatient driver who now jammed on the brakes and announced they were here.

Dimitri glanced at the fare meter and handed him a twenty.

"Thanks," he mumbled through clenched teeth. Getting out of the car would take a lot more effort than usual. Everything throbbed at this point.

The driver eyed him sceptically.

"I'll be fine," Dimitri mumbled. He held on to his side as he stepped back out into the rain. It was late and it was dark outside. The neighbourhood was deathly quiet.

'Please be home,' he thought. The idea of taking another cab back to the hotel made him shudder. But as he slowly made his way to the door he was starting to have second thoughts about coming here as well.

_What the hell do I say? Here I am. A mess. Please nurse me back to health. The way you did the first time we met._

_Is that why you're the only person I want to be near when I'm miserable? Because I trust you to take care of me? _

_I wanted to do the same for you, Alex. _

_But you wouldn't let me. _

He'd have made an effort to take a deep breath, but his ribs hurt too much for that.

He knocked on the door and waited.

It wasn't a long wait before Alex opened the door. She wore a trench coat and had an umbrella in her hand, as if ready to leave.

_At this time? _

"Dimitri?" She looked shocked to see him.

"Hi, Alex..."

In a gesture that took him by surprise, her hand reached out to the bandage on his face.

"What _happened_ to you?"

"There was a big pile up on the highway..."

"I know," Alex looked at him in disbelief. "I just saw it on the news. Twenty-two cars totalled, three people dead...all because of one drunken idiot."

"Mine was the first car that idiot hit."

Alex stared at him, as if trying to assess his condition under the porch light.

"Do you think..." Dimitri searched for the right words. Something he usually had no trouble with. "I could use a bed, I mean...what I'm trying to say is that I'd love to stay at a place that's not a hotel room."

"Dimitri..." she looked at him incredulously. "Why aren't you in a hospital? Has a doctor seen you yet?"

"I was...there was a wait. I couldn't stand it anymore. So I left."

Alex moved a hand to her mouth. "Tell me you're kidding."

"I'd really like to lie down..." He was starting to feel lightheaded.

"Jesus Christ...you need to have someone look at you."

"Tomorrow."

"I don't think so." Alex shook her head and made him put an arm over her shoulder. "Not tomorrow. Tonight. Do you realize you could be bleeding internally?"

She walked him over to the car that stood in the drive way, holding him steady.

"No hospital," he insisted. He didn't have it in him to go back to lying on a stretcher in some hallway that smelled of disinfectant.

"You need to see a doctor!"

"_You're _a doctor!" he tried as she helped him into the passenger's side of the car.

He expected anger and frustration from her, but the only emotion he caught on her face was concern.

Dimitri leaned back in his seat, convinced that if his body didn't hurt quite as much, he'd have given in to sleep long ago.

The car wouldn't start and Alex banged her fist against the steering wheel in frustration. Judging from the ample rust he'd seen even in the darkness he guessed the vehicle was overdue for retirement.

"Nice set of wheels."

Alex turned sideways, her eyes meeting his. "Do you want to walk?"

Dimitri shook his head, unable to help a smile. She was even more beautiful when her irritation was mixed with determination. "No."

"It'll start...trust me."

"Alex...come on," he reached for her arm. "Please, no hospital. I'm going to be fine."

"You don't know that, damn it!" she shot back. "I don't have anything at home to monitor your vital signs overnight and I'm not able to do a full examination here! If anything were to happen to you..."

She stopped mid-sentence when the car's engine finally roared to life and never finished what she was going to say, speeding out of the driveway in silence instead.

"Alex..."

"I work nights at a 24-hour clinic," she told him. "There's enough equipment there that they can have a decent look at you. If the doctor doesn't think you need to be admitted, I'll trust him on it, okay?"

Dimitri nodded. "Fine"

He was too sore and tired to argue anyway.

* * *

As always, big thanks to my two editors Kel and Annie for keeping the typos in single digits. :)


	17. Chapter 17

**I know, I know...it's been forever. Sorry! Summer has been getting in the way. :) Thanks for your patience and big thanks as always to my two editors, Annie and Kel. **

* * *

**Chapter 17**

_Vancouver, Canada _

* * *

"Of course it would be packed," Alex groaned as they entered the clinic. "The one night I need it not to be..."

Dimitri widened his eyes. The clinic's waiting room was full of people, some of them clearly intoxicated, others clearly homeless. "Are you kidding me, Alex?" he whispered. "Please tell me you don't work here."

"This is what you get for walking out of a hospital," she shot back. "I'll get you an exam room. In the meantime, sit down."

Alex saw Ahmad from the corner of her eye. She was early for her shift, but he was even earlier. Not that this should have surprised her.

"Ahmad," she approached him. "I need a room for someone."

The doctor looked at her as though she'd cracked a joke. "There are over two dozen people here that need an exam room!"

"He's really hurt," she tried. "He was in the pile up. I don't want him to have to wait an hour or more..."

"Alexia! Take him to an ER!"

"He won't..." Alex cringed. "He's...stubborn._ Please_? Can you just put him ahead of the others?"

For the first time since she'd known him, he looked annoyed with her. "No, I can't."

"Ahmad..." she lowered her voice, knowing she wouldn't give in until he agreed. "He's my husband."

"_What_?"

"Please?"

"Fine," he said through clenched teeth, clearly doing her the favour against his better judgment. "Put him in room two after Wing clears it."

Alex exhaled. "_Thank_ you."

"I thought I told you to sit down?" Alex said to Dimitri when she came back and deftly moved her arm under his, leading him to an examination room.

"Can we just leave?" he tried again. "There are obviously people here that need to see you more than I do..."

"I doubt that," Alex replied, pushing him towards an exam room. "Please..." she added, gentler this time. "Lie down and take off your shirt." She handed him a cotton hospital gown.

Dimitri groaned. "Is this _really _necessary?"

"Yes."

He looked pale and exhausted. Whatever adrenaline rush sustained him after the accident was long gone. He might have hidden it well enough from someone else, but Alex knew he was in considerable pain. Her first instinct was to do whatever she could. Whatever it took to make things right. Not because she was a physician and he was an injured body.

But because it was Dimitri.

What hurt him, hurt her. It always would.

"Are you in a lot of pain?" she asked.

"I'll live."

"Can I get an honest answer?"

"I've felt better."

She helped him take off his shirt, cringing when she saw his left side. His ribs were clearly bruised, possibly even broken. She helped him lie down, watching his face contort in the process.

_I bet you've felt better. In fact, I bet there weren't many times that you've felt worse. _

Alex reached into the medical cabinet, unwrapped a new syringe and took out an ampoule filled with liquid medication.

Ahmad was going to kill her for this.

But Ahmad might take some time before he got in here. And Dimitri Marick wasn't about to sue her.

She filled the syringe. "This will make you feel more comfortable until Ahmad takes a look at you," she told him, before injecting it into his arm.

"The_ other_ doctor? Why can't you...?"

"I don't practice here. Or anywhere. I check people in at the reception desk. It's where I need to be in..." She looked at her watch. "Five minutes."

"Alex," he'd grabbed a hold of her wrist.

"What?" She _wanted_ to take care of him. To do whatever was in her power to make sure he'd be alright. But she'd already pushed her luck, without needing to cement her chances of getting fired.

"Don't leave."

Alex bit her lip.

_He's hurt and exhausted. He came back to you because he crashed his car in a foreign country where he doesn't know anyone but you. That's all. _

She squeezed his hand. "I'm going to make sure you're okay. I promise."

His hand held on to hers. "I know. You always do."

She pointed to the empty vial of medication. "When Ahmad comes in to look at you, show him what I gave you, and whatever you do, don't mention that I'm a doctor, okay?"

"So are you allowed to...?"

"No, and he'll be livid. But I'll deal with that. Just tell him the truth."

He nodded and she could see his eyes close as the drugs started to take effect.

_Kigali, Rwanda_

* * *

"Your room is on the third floor. The top," the tall African receptionist told her, after taking the five twenty dollar bills he'd just been handed. "The stairs are past the pay phone, on your right hand side."

Anna Devane looked at her silver watch. "You'll knock on the door in six hours?"

"Yes, like you asked ma'am. In six hours."

"Thank you."

Anna wasn't convinced they actually would, but she tried to give herself some insurance. Just in case.

This hotel was vastly different from the one Robin was staying at.

Everything about it was run-down, from the cracks in the wall, the peeling wallpaper and the pervasive smell of stale cigarette smoke.

There was a dimly lit bar in the lobby with four single barstools, two of which were occupied. Two pairs of dark eyes that leered at her as she walked by them. The last thing Anna wanted was to stop next to the bar's patrons, but there was no soda machine anywhere in view and, in spite of the front desk clerk's reassurance, she wasn't convinced the water coming out of the taps in the room was drinkable.

And after walking at least a mile in the midday heat, after leaving Robert's house, she was parched.

"Three bottles of water, please," she told the woman standing behind the counter.

"Twenty dollars," was the reply.

Of course no one but a dumb, rich tourist would pay that much. It was an invitation to barter.

But Anna could care less about that.

Anna clumsily took the three plastic bottles from the woman's hand and handed her an American twenty dollar bill. She wasn't in the mood for games.

Anna used the last of her energy to walk up the stairs and made a face when she opened the door to her room. It too reeked of cigarettes and at first glance the mattress on the bed was so well-worn she could see its lumps and indentations, through the thin blanket that covered it.

She debated going downstairs to ask for another room, but then scratched the idea. As if it would be any different. Instead she yanked open the window in an attempt to let in some of the hot, stagnant air from outside.

Aside from the bed, there was no space to sit, so Anna sank down on the floor next to the bed frame, leaning against it as she pressed a cold bottle of water against her cheek.

Since regaining the bulk of her memories, or at least the bulk of the ones that she thought mattered, Anna had never pushed herself to remember more. Mostly because of the physical toll that came with trying to remember, and partly because some things were better left forgotten.

_How wrong I was._

There were times when she debated going to see a hypnotist. Someone with a soothing voice who would help her piece together those final fragments while she'd be lying on a comfortable couch in a candle-lit, lavender-scented room.

Anna looked around her uninviting surroundings and managed a smile. "Not exactly what I had in mind."

Maybe it wasn't the Ritz, but it gave her the one thing she needed right now, privacy and solitude. This was something she needed to do alone. Away from her daughter's concern. Or David's need to protect her.

Or Robert.

She sighed at the thought of him.

_I still can't believe you're alive. Can't believe that I just spoke to you._

"Argued with," she corrected herself.

Anna finished drinking most of the water, before reaching for her purse. She pulled out the container of the prescription medication that she'd used in Rome, debating what to do.

Remembering was going to hurt. That much she knew with certainty, even if she couldn't explain why.

The pills were good on the days when her headaches were unbearable but they were also strong enough to cloud her mind. It was a double edged-sword.

The last thing she needed was for the pain to make her lose consciousness. Not that it had happened since she lived in Canada with Bart. But her mind also needed to be clear and coherent, or else she wouldn't be able to trust what she remembered.

She put the container away.

"Let's wait and see and then go from there," she decided aloud.

Anna took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

It was time.

Time to remember everything. Not just the time right after the explosion, or the moments that occurred right before it happened.

But many long days and nights before it took place.

Days and nights she hadn't wanted to go back to ever again.

_Did it never occur to you why you didn't want to remember that time? _

Anna bit her lip, angry with herself. Angry for not doing this sooner.

_Coward. _

It was hard at first. To force her mind to not only go back in time, but to force it to focus on specifics.

_How did I end up on that ship? What were the events that led up to it? _

She remembered Robin and school. Impatiently waiting in a principal's office with her daughter.

_Why? _

Robin had been suspended for fighting with a boy. A fight she didn't start.

Anna recalled her anger and indignation. Not because she was bothered by the idea of Robin being in a fight, but because she knew her daughter well enough to know she was telling the truth. It was the injustice of it all that bothered her. The knowledge that she was being framed somehow.

_Except it wasn't Robin who was being framed, it was me. _

That too was coming back to her. In muddled bits and pieces.

The boy's parents never showed up at the principal's office. What was his name again? Frankie? Stanley?

They'd left the school together that day, with Anna being far more irritated than her daughter.

_Already back then you were the old soul, the calm one. _

She, on the other hand decided to storm off to the boy's parents' house alone. It was one thing for the boy to accuse Robin of instigating a fight, another for his parents to not even give her the courtesy of defending her child.

_Where was Robert during this? She remembered that he was out of town, but she couldn't remember where or why. _

A woman answered the door. Anna had been fuming and the boy's mother seemed indifferent. She'd asked her to wait while she got his father.

_Except it wasn't his father who appeared. It was Cesar Faison._

The hair on her skin bristled at the sight. He'd insisted they talk about their future. Talk that made her feel sick to her stomach, until she couldn't stand to listen to his mad ranting anymore.

So his elaborate ploy to get her alone worked. But she wouldn't give him the satisfaction of taking his plans seriously. She got up to leave the house.

But he blocked her way.

It was only then that her anger and repulsion were suddenly replaced by genuine fear.

It was no longer a game.

She'd tried to fight him off, but it had been a long time then since she'd last gone to a karate class. She wasn't just the weaker of the two, she was woefully unprepared for the steps he was willing to take. She felt like as though she was in a stranger's body.

His arms were around her before she even made her first strike.

A needle was pushed through the fleshy part of her upper arm before she even realized he'd pulled a syringe out of his pocket.

And whatever he'd given her took effect at lightning speed. She couldn't even remember falling into his waiting arms like a lifeless rag doll.

Back in her hotel room, Anna opened her eyes and pressed a hand against her forehead. Her heart was racing and her head was starting to hurt.

She took a deep breath and reached for another water bottle. She opened it and drank from it, waiting for her nerves to calm. Her recollections had so far come with surprising ease and the accompanying pain was manageable.

_So why was I always so hesitant to go there? Why does the idea of going there terrify me? _

"Because of what happens next..." she whispered aloud.

The words sent a chill up her spine and Anna drew up her knees. She was still sitting on the floor, leaning against the bed frame.

_Why would I say that? What happens next? _

Anna swallowed another sip of water, before closing its top and setting it down next to her.

She closed her eyes and forced herself to focus again.

_It was time to go there._

"That's it, darling. Time to come back. For good this time...I was starting to worry."

His was the first face she saw when she woke up from what felt like the longest nap in the world. The sight of it made her feel sick. Or so she thought, until she realized she really _did_ feel sick. Literally.

She fought back the rising bile in the back of her throat to check out her surroundings. Just pushing herself into a seated position made the room spin around. The furnishings were simple and bare, more functional than anything else. And everything seemed oddly and inexplicably narrow and small. The ceiling too, was much lower than she'd expect in a normal room.

_"Where am I?"_

"You're somewhere safe. Away from everyone who is always trying to poison us."

Anna stared at Cesar Faison in disbelief. None of this was making any sense and she felt as though she was slowly losing the fight to keep the contents of her stomach where they were. "I don't feel so good..." she mumbled. "I need a washroom."

"Here..." he held out his hand, as if knowing that standing up was going to make her unbelievably dizzy.

He held on to her as she stumbled to the tiny washroom located just outside the room they were. Anna almost slammed the door in his face and could have sworn she felt the ground move beneath her. She barely had time to lift the toilet cover before she lost the struggle and threw up.

Afterward, she heard Faison pounding on the door. "Anna? Are you alright."

Anna ignored him as she set the toilet cover back down and sat down on it, bending over as she lowered her head into her hands. She still felt dizzy but otherwise better.

She waited several long moments before attempting to stand up again and brave a look into the mirror.

"Anna! Answer me! Or else I'll break the door down!"

"You do that," she mumbled, cringing at the sight of her as she turned on the water tap and washed her face. Her skin was deathly pale and her hair a tangled mess. But it wasn't the ghastly reflection that caught her attention, it was the round window next to the mirror.

She stood on tip-toes to catch a glimpse outside, gasping at what she saw.

Water.

An endless blue expanse of water as far as the eye could see. There wasn't a hint of land in sight.

She was on a ship.

Anna swallowed, feeling the same paralyzing fear she'd first felt at the house where Faison had drugged her.

"Where the hell did you bring me?"

Faison pounded against the door again. "Anna, answer me!"

Anna's fear mixed with anger and rage now. "How dare you..."

She yanked open the door and Faison almost came crashing in. The action threw him off balance and Anna wasted no time in attacking him. Clasping her arms together to administer a blow to the back of his neck that sent him tumbling to the floor.

It was time she remembered how to fight.

"Damn you," she heard him utter before striking him a second time.

This time he was the one who was unprepared.

She stepped over him and clumsily ran out of the room, unsure of where she was going. The corridor was narrow and there was metal machinery on one side. Anna saw a ladder leading upwards and climbed it.

It brought her to the ship's next deck, but she was still trapped inside.

She ran down another corridor. This one was neater and more elegant in its furnishings. She even spotted an oil painting hanging next to a closed door.

And then she spotted him.

The giant.

A huge man with a bald head that nearly touched the ceiling. He wore a black linen shirt with sleeves rolled up to elbows, revealing massive forearms.

He might have been a ship worker, but for his size. He was so large he would have made the average nightclub bouncer look small.

He glared at her and Anna turned around, searching for a way to get away from him. A way that wouldn't mean going back down the same ladder she'd just come up from.

When all she saw were closed doors, she tried meeting his eyes instead, pleading. "I've been kidnapped, against my will, please...you have to help me get away."

Seeing the hint of amusement on his face made her realize the ridiculousness of her pleas. The man no doubt worked for Faison. His very own human pit bull.

In a panic, Anna tried to open one of the closed doors when he started coming towards her.

It was locked.

Anna ran away from it, away from the giant. But he was surprisingly fast for his size and there was nowhere for her to flee.

He grabbed a hold of one of her arms and Anna managed to evade his grasp, which made him angry. He lunged for her and this time his grasp was tight and hard.

Anna spun around and managed to land her fist right on his nose.

_Bad idea. _

It made him angry.

His hands grabbed her sides and he picked her up with ease, slamming her against the wall so hard that Anna swore she heard something crack in her body.

Her legs felt like rubber and she slid down against the wall. She hadn't yet hit the ground when she felt the giant's hand slap her face with such force that she could see stars.

"Are you mad?"

Anna heard a voice yelling from what seemed far away.

She spotted Cesar Faison coming up the same ladder she'd climbed up.

He was kneeling next to her with a look of disbelief on his face.

"If you touch her again, it will be the last thing you ever do," Faison hissed at the giant, who then left her line of vision without a word.

"Oh Anna..." He cradled her in his arm. "What in the world were you thinking?"

'I clearly wasn't,' she thought.

He gently ran his thumb along her cheek. "Stop fighting me, my love." He gingerly helped her stand back up and this time she held on to him in earnest, afraid she wouldn't have made it back up on her own. Every bone in her body hurt. "Oh Anna..." he repeated, shaking his head like a parent, regretful that the lesson their child just learned had to be so very harsh. "Stop fighting me, Anna. You won't win."

_Stop fighting it, you're not going to win. _

Anna opened her eyes. She wasn't on the ship anymore, but back in her hotel room in Africa. And the headache wasn't manageable anymore.

She knew her memories wouldn't be pleasant, but she hadn't expected them to be so jarring and violent. Right from the start.

Anna reached for the container of prescription pills and took one out swallowing it with what was left of the water in the second bottle.

She felt a layer of perspiration trickling down to the nape of her neck, a reminder of how much effort she had to put forth to bring back a past she once wanted nothing more to do with.

Anna pushed herself off the floor and groaned when the gesture amplified the throbbing in her skull. It was time to call it a day.

No matter how unappealing the bed with its lumpy mattress was, she needed to lie down and sleep it off.

She picked up the phone and called the front desk. "I asked you to check on me earlier, please cancel that."

At least the pain wasn't bad enough to knock her out, or even mess with her vision, as it once did, when she was first started to remember years ago. While she might not have appreciated it right now, it was progress.

Anna set down the phone and pressed a hand against her forehead. She should text Robin again. Let her know she was alright. But hopefully her daughter would have believed the first message she sent her after leaving Robert's house.

Right now she didn't care if anyone worried. She wanted to fall into a dreamless sleep, before starting it all over again when she woke up.


	18. Chapter 18

What can I say? I was trying to set a new record of longest time between updates... ;) Sorry this one took forever. I don't even have an excuse as this part has been written for some time but I thought maybe if I posted this, it'd motivate me to continue. No promises though!

In case you don't remember what happened in previous chapters (even I didn't), here's a little synopsis: Robert and Anna finally reunited in Africa, but it wasn't exactly a happy reunion as Anna couldn't quite forgive Robert for playing dead all these years even if he did have (according to him anyway, lol) some very legit reasons. Upon reuniting with Robert, Anna also finds out that _she_ was the person who set the explosion on that tanker all these years ago. It's a revelation that throws her for a loop and, for once and for all, she decides to make a concerted effort to remember what happened on that ship, by taking off by herself to a motel room and forcing herself to confront her memories, no matter how difficult they are. Meanwhile, Alex dragged Dimitri to her clinic in Vancouver after his car accident and then stuck him in a cab back to her apartment to recover.

* * *

**Chapter 18 **

_Vancouver, Canada _

It took Dimitri Marick a long moment to remember where he was when he woke up, because absolutely nothing looked familiar, _especially _not the dark-eyed toddler that was standing at the foot of his bed, staring at him.

"Hi."

"Hi," the little boy answered back, not taking his eyes off him even for a second.

Dimitri pushed himself up and glanced at the clock on the bedside table.

_13:22_

_It's one twenty-two in the afternoon, I'm in a strange bedroom wearing a t-shirt that doesn't belong to me, and there's a little dark-haired boy staring at me. _

_And my body feels like it's been hit by a truck. _

He barely remembered much of anything after Alex told him to wait for the doctor at the clinic. He had a vague recollection of stepping into a taxi and speaking Spanish to an old lady who met him at the door and helped him into bed.

He winced as he sat up, trying to remember the boy's name. He remembered Alex saying it aloud when he first came to see her.

_I probably should know the name of my wife's son. _

He held out a toy train to him. "Thomas."

Dimitri smiled. "Is that your name?"

"No," the boy came closer, ready to climb up into the bed. Looking at him as though he'd asked a dumb question. "The train." His nose was running and Dimitri grabbed a tissue.

"Come here, let's fix that," he said to the boy, who looked at him sceptically. Dimitri hoisted him up onto his lap and wiped his nose. "That's better."

The boy made a face that told him he didn't agree, but he made no move to wriggle out of his grasp. In fact, he seemed pretty comfortable where he was.

A sudden chill went up Dimitri's spine. _Am I holding _my _son?_

"Liam, whatare you doing?"

Dimitri didn't see Alex enter the room.

She scooped the boy up into her arms. "I'm sorry," she told Dimitri.

"No...no... it's okay."

"You're hurt," she told him. "And Liam knows better than to cuddle with strangers."

"I'm a stranger?"

She gave him a lop-sided smile. "You are to Liam." She set the boy down and told him to go see Maria.

She looked tired and, as far as he could remember, she still wore the same clothes she did last night. "Have you slept?"

Alex stifled a yawn. "Not yet. I wanted to check on you after you woke up. I'll sleep after that."

"I'm fine."

"Let me judge that. Take off your shirt."

"I thought you said you didn't have equipment at hand to examine me."

"I have eyes and hands," she replied. "I can look...and poke and prod."

"Alex..."

"For god's sake. You had a car accident last night that could have killed you. Would you humour me, so I can go to sleep without worrying that you're dying in room next to me?"

"Well," Dimitri took off his t-shirt. "If you put it that way."

She'd already put on her glasses and he felt her fingers running along his side. "Tell me if anything hurts."

"Everything hurts."

"Anything _specific_?"

"Not at the moment."

He gritted his teeth when she started prodding his ribs. "Don't do that."

"Sorry. For what it's worth, you're lucky they're not broken."

"That's me. Lucky. How was your night?"

"Crazy."

"Did you get in trouble with that doctor for..."

"Yes," she answered before he had a chance to finish. "He fired me this morning. After we finished with the rush."

"What?" Dimitri looked at her in disbelief. "Alex, I'll explain...I'll tell him I insisted! That this wasn't your fault..." Then again, when he took a second to think about it, he wondered what he was saying. He _didn't _want her working there. Not in that kind of chaos or that kind of neighbourhood.

She took off her glasses and rubbed her eyes, unable to hold back a yawn this time. "Ahmad was right to do what he did. I'd have done the exact same thing. It doesn't matter...I'll find another job."

"Alex..."

Again she didn't let him finish. "I can't even imagine how sore you are." She pointed to a bottle of pills on the nightstand. "Ahmad prescribed these and I picked them up on the way home. I suggest you take one every six hours for the next couple of days, until you start to feel human again."

"I'm going to be okay."

"I know," she said. "But don't overdo it, the bruises you have are not minor. You're welcome to stay in bed for the rest of the day, in fact I'd recommend it. I can ask Maria to bring you something. She's an amazing cook."

"Where will you sleep?"

"Maria has a bed."

"I have a hotel room, I don't want to..."

"You can go to your hotel if you like. I won't stop you. But..." she paused for just a moment. Long enough for him to catch her hesitation. Or was it something else he caught in her voice? "You can stay here too."

He nodded, knowing already which one he'd choose. "Fine."

"I'll see you when I get up."

He swallowed, feeling a lump in his throat. What a routine thing to say: _I'll see you_. Words that usually went in one ear and out the other. They were so routine they'd long since lost their meaning.

_A few days ago, I would have given the world to hear you say them again._

In spite of his soreness, he felt a contentment that he hadn't felt in a long time.

"Goodnight, Alex."

* * *

_Kigali, Rwanda _

"Dad?"

Robin Scorpio opened the door of her hotel room, surprised to find her father on the other side.

"What are you doing here?"

He gave her a quick hug before looking around the room. "Did your mother come back here?"

Robin hadn't missed the worried look on his face. "No. Why? What happened when she went to see you?"

"Did she call you?"

Robin shook her head. "No. But she sent me a text."

"A text?"

Robin held out her cell phone. "Here, read it for yourself."

_Might not be back at hotel tonight. Some things I need to take care of alone. Nothing serious, don't worry. I'm fine. Love you. xo _

Robert looked at it, unconvinced.

"Dad, what's going on?"

Robert didn't say anything and his silence alone annoyed Robin.

"Dad...I'm not thirteen anymore. Tell me what's going on."

Her father was on the verge of pacing around the room but he stopped himself. "Her coming to see me...it didn't go well."

"What did expect?" Robin prompted. "Did you think she was going to agree with your decision to play dead all this time for the sake of our protection? If you do...you really don't know her anymore. This is Mom we're talking about."

"It's not that, luv," he tried to explain. "It's when I tried to make her understand why I did it. I didn't realize that she might not have remembered..."

"Remembered what?"

"That she set the explosion on the boat."

Robin sat down at the desk in her room and frowned. Her father was right. There was a good chance her mother wouldn't have remembered that. It wasn't something she'd ever mentioned, and it had been news to Robin when her father first suggested it to her.

_And it's not like we got a chance to talk about it since she came here..._

"I assumed she had her complete memory back," Robert explained.

Robin's frown deepened. It was an assumption her shouldn't have made. One among many. "Was she shocked?"

Her father ran a hand through his thinning hair. "You could say that. Robin, there's something else too. Something I didn't tell you..."

_Of course there are more secrets_. Robin stopped just short of rolling her eyes. "What?"

"I don't think your Mom had any intention of getting off that ship alive when she set those explosives."

"What?" This time she did roll her eyes. "That's one hell of an assumption, Dad."

"I also think your mother realized that was the truth and that's why she ran."

Robin put her hands on her hips. There were too many feelings assaulting her now. Shock. Anger. Indignation. Disbelief. "You know what I think, Dad?"

"Luv, I'm not trying to..."

She wouldn't let him finish. "I think you have no clue what you're talking about. That it's pretty arrogant and presumptuous to think you can read Mom's mind after you spend, what ten minutes with her, out of the last fifteen years?"

"So where _is_ your mother right now?" he asked her softly.

"I don't know," Robin admitted. "But I know that no matter how much the truth might've hurt her, she's not about to fly off the deep end because of it. If you think it is, then you really don't know her anymore."

Robert raised his hand in a defensive mix of anger and defeat. "Look, I get it. I don't know you anymore. You or your mother. I missed too much of your life for that. And I deserve every jab you're throwing at me right, but can we look past that for a moment and focus on your Mom, and make sure she's okay?"

Robin bit her lip. Maybe her reactions to his concern were a little more insolent teenager than rational adult. But still, this time she wasn't about to back down.

"You what else I think, Dad?" she said softly. This time her voice was level and there was no hint of bitterness. "I don't think you can play dead all this time, then come back into our lives and feel like you suddenly have a right to know what Mom's up to when she's upset. Leave that to me." She took a deep breath. "You're not our protector anymore."

This time there was no mistaking the sting her words left on him.

"I see." He took a step back, acknowledging defeat this time around. "So what do you want me to do?"

"I want you to go home. And when I've heard from Mom, I'll give you a call."

Robin could almost see the effort it took for him to relinquish the control he was so used to exerting.

"Fine, luv."

He left her hotel room without another word and Robin slumped down on the bed, exhaling.

Then she picked up her phone and dialled her mother's number.

"Mom...Dad was here. He thinks you're about to do something crazy and is ready to send the cavalry after you. I told him he had no idea what he was talking about." She took another deep breath. "Please call and tell me that I'm right!"


End file.
